Tuesday Tip: Eat Cake.

by

Once upon a time MizFit bought a book as a gift for a friend’s birthday.

Then, as luck would have it, she stumbled upon the *truly* perfect gift for aforementioned friend and said book fell to the back of her shelving unit (if by shelving unit you mean floor because that’s pretty much how the MizFit rolls—–which I do)

Flash forward a few years when the MizFit finally had time to read again (cue joyous music/bookstore gift cards falling from the sky) and for some reason she chose this book.

It wasnt a book to which she’d normally be drawn (being more the baking of protein bars type than the whipping up of fancy cakes) but lo and behold she loved it.

DEVOURED it if you will.

And, while doing so, learned more than a few things about BEING PRESENT and living life.

Eat Cake (by Jeanne Ray. Link at top of page…click MizFit Recommends) was really surprisingly good. Lemmie give you the book’s description:

Married life is not always bliss, as Ruth, a married mother of two, is finding out. (ok the MizFit mightcould relate to this) Her normal life with a hospital administrator husband, surly teenage daughter and son at college is quickly disappearing as, within a year, Ruth’s mother comes to live with them, her husband loses his job and Ruth begins to wonder if her life is ever going to be happy again (not my idea of escapism. Im all about the blissfully happy characters as there’s enough struggle in my real world). The situation goes from bad to worse when Ruth’s father, who has been estranged from his family since Ruth was two years old, calls to announce he has broken both of his wrists and needs to move in with them while he recovers (again, cry me a river. the MizFit wants a more happy book if it’s fiction).

(The piece of resistance?) Ruth feels helpless, and the only thing that makes her feel better is baking cakes.

Simply reading the description it’s easy to see why the book lolled about on my shelf:

semi-depressing character circumstances + a woman whose escape is cake baking + a MizFit who is more about the laughter/cake ORDERING= not a must read.

yet I was wrong.

I knew it early on in the book when the main character describes taking a stress reduction course and tells how the instructor told them to, essentially, go to their safe place.

she continues describing how her classmates had the standard calming places (beach scenes etc) yet hers, which she was too embarrassed to share, was the inside of a warm hollowed out center of a cake. This isnt a food fantasy, the character clarifies, it’s all about scents, warmth, and the comfort of the cake-cocoon.

She continues taking about how the turning down of cake has become a virtue in our society.

That we now revere the discipline of the woman who declines dessert and how sad she truly finds that.

The character notes that cake isnt every day, but that it is the happiest of days: special meals out. birthdays. weddings. family gatherings.

In her mind, the cake decliner isnt one to be revered as having will power but one to feel sad for as s/he has lost touch with the joy in life (please to note that Jeanne Ray says this all far more poetically than I).

The story unfolds & I was riveted by the authors description of the mother/daughter dynamic.

In one scene, where the main character/mother is paralyzed by life-fear, she surrenders to her daughter and, essentially, hands over the reigns to her world.

She marvels at how confident her daughter has become and wonders to herself if she had that same confidence at 16 and if life had taken it out of her.

For some reason this book just resonated with me now.

It wont change your life.

It might not even cause you to ponder things such as being present, being supportive, the importance of family, and the *importance* of supporting said family even if you think their passions/ventures are crazy as it with did me.

If nothing else it will give you the tiniest of pause the next time cake is proffered—-whether you accept the confection or not.

My tip of the day? Eat Cake. Both kinds.

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Comments

  1. This post resonated with the Bag Lady today, having just gone through a rather traumatic medical scare with family member (which turned out well, thanks). Made the Bag Lady realize that one needs to live more in the moment, appreciate the little things and stop trying so hard to be someone else’s idea of perfect. So what if you are carrying a few extra pounds? If you lose a loved one, will your memories be of the good times you had together, or of the fun times you passed up because you were on a “diet”? That’s not to say we shouldn’t all try to be healthy and in reasonably good shape, but that we all need to Eat Cake once in awhile, too.
    **getting off soapbox now**

  2. It’s interesting what books resonate with us at different times in our lives! Normally I don’t read fiction (probably the reason why I am the geek that I am) but I will look this one up on your advice. Thanks for the tip!

  3. BagLady? So glad youre the first comment and that you entirely GET IT.
    (glad the scare was just that.)

    and C?
    *sigh*
    the MizFit now knows it is wholly NOT HAPPENING that she’s as smart and well informed as the GFE.
    She hearts the fiction.

    all under the guise of (FQ) research (unFQ) for her own work—but we all know she’s lyin’

    M.

  4. It sounds like a great book, I will add it to my *floor* as well. 🙂

    and many thanks to the bag lady for an awesome response. “so what if you are carrying a few extra pounds? If you lose a loved one, will your memories be of the good times you had together, or of the fun times you passed up because you were on a “diet”?

    for some reason, that just hit extra hard this morning and helps put me back in reality. 🙂

  5. Sounds like a good read and your description was definitely thought-provoking. I’m adding to the list for my book club. We’re actually reading 1000 splendid suns right now – talk about putting things in perspective. The ding in the door of my Pacifica isn’t really bumming me out anymore (well, to be honest – it never really did – but you get the point).

    I also have to comment about your statement regarding “enough struggle in real life – don’t like reading it…” or something to that affect (whatever you wrote was obviously more eloquent). I KNOW. Seeing movies has become very hard for me – so much anxiety, violence, sadness… and I’m paying $16.50 to sit through it?! And reading the book I just mentioned – PAINFUL. I appreciate it. I get it. I’m learning from it. But, good lord – it is heartwrenching. Is this really a good stress reliever or hobby for me? I wonder.

    I think I need some cake.

  6. I was totally with you after reading the initial description. I was thinking that life is too uncertain and difficult at times to read someone’s fictionalized troubles. Then as you continued the description (especially the mother/daughter relationship – something I’m struggling with from both sides), I was won over. I’ll add it to the pile on the kitchen counter.

  7. Mmmm….cake.

    Seriously, though, Bag Lady, nice anecdote. I think we often need to remind ourselves that life is too short to deny ourselves good fun and great memories.

  8. I have to say it sounds intriguing.
    I was right with you all along the “fiction should be less depressing” part, but I really love the idea of enjoying the moment Right Now. If that means having a piece of cake, so be it.
    I’ll look out for this book — thanks!

  9. Ooh, sounds like a good read! And I do so love a good read. I think I have a copy of it around here somewhere (in a windowsill…we (read: Joe) put books in the windowsill to keep em off the floor) and I’ll have to dig it up.

    And I echo the above comment: “mmm, cake.”

  10. I’ll have to check it out. I am a huge believer in the healing power of making (and eating) home-baked goods. If you’re going to eat cake, let it be one made with your own hands with wonderful, fresh ingredients, that absolutely makes your head spin with glee. I always am tempted to preach to the ladies staring at all of the cake mixes on the baking aisle. I want to spread the joy of baking a cake from scratch. Nothing can beat it.

  11. I will add that book to my list. Thanks for the suggestion.

    Oh, and you’ll be happy to know that I was thinking of you this morning as I was doing tricep dips at boot camp class. I could feel the burn and I thought “Mizfit would be so proud of me!” 🙂

  12. okay, so i’d have to tell the estranged father with the broken wrists to go take a hike…..call me mean…………

    And if you’re living in Austin town, head over to the upper crust bakery and buy an Italian Cream Cake……..what a deal for 25.00!!! I am an avid baker but my oven is on the blink. Had to “order out” for a party last weekend………The cake was awesome……….first rate………i’ll never bake again! We ate on it for a solid week……a tiny bit in the morning with coffee and then a tiny bit more later in the day……..

    good times

  13. forget the cake, well I mean I would eat pie and ice cream over cake any day! I do get the point though. Its like giving up things “forever” as soon as you do, you want it. With things like cake, I find I might pass on it sometimes, but not always! I think its better to eat the cake and take a walk later than dream about cake for a week!

  14. GREETINGS MARY OF LOTTSA YOGA WISDOM,

    thanks for the caketip and feel free (*hint*) to email me about doing a guest yoga guru day or guest chef post!

    M.

  17. Oh gosh! I did just this today – eat cake! But then I got the sugar buzz. That sent me into La La Land!
    BUT I do agree with the book’s message of enjoying the little things in life, living life to the fullest.

  19. Rarely do I say no to a piece of cake. Hummm, I need to stop baking them! Two birthday parties this week for 4 year olds? Nope, I’m gonna enjoy the faces of those little boys and my little girl while they have a good time with their friends and we all enjoy cake! Life is precious.

  20. Can’t wait to start the book! I love both fiction & cake, so the combination should be fantastic 🙂

    My tip for cakes: make it, eat a piece, send the rest to work with a loved one.

    I do this more often than I should, probably.

  23. I made a cake today for one of my co-workers birthday. We had a lunch picnic and I forgot the forks, so not only did we eat cake, we ate it with our fingers and had a great time!

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