Blogging malaise—you got it?

Please to grab some water, a protein-rich snack & commence skimming this waytoolong post. Id blame you (as it’s a response to many emails/tweets Ive received as of late) but it’s probably my own fault for not being merciless with the editing. You’ll have that.

I recently joked on twitter that blogging is like the  mafia: just when you think you’re out—it sucks you back in.

Blogging is a funny, funny thing.

In my experience most of us begin with nary an expectation and somewhere along the way lose our path.

I like to joke that my life as a blogger is a cautionary tale (to steal a phrase from this uber talented writer) as in only ten!short!years! Ive grown from paid-blogger (or online-journaler as we were called then) to blogging for free.

(aside: Obviously Im not motivated by money or there would be a bazillion products & affiliate links here. That said, I was curious if people would be offended by my highly honest “I like to say EVERYONE LOVES MIZFIT…for free!” They were not. It appears people assume “EVERYONE” refers to everyone *but* them.  In-box still duly slammed.)

I was feeling a lot BloggingMalaise’y…and then I went to Fitbloggin.

Prior to leaving town Id written/slotted an April 1st blog post essentially saying Im all done, People.  After 3 years Ive shared all the info I have and it’s time to just hang WITH YOU & READ YOU and await the next chapter in my life.

Fitbloggin was amazing.

I’ll admit to being a smidgetad befuddled by a few of the attendees who blog less and earn more (seriously, who wouldnt covet that?) yet the overarching sentiment of being at a FAMILY REUNION & among friends who truly *get me* was so powerful I deleted the post on the flight home.

I was feeling a lot BloggingMalaise’y…and then I STOPPED, SLOWED DOWN, & read my in-box.

Not my hand-held (as I typically do) but from the computer screen.

And I am not embarrassed to say that I hit PRINT on many of the messages, folded them & placed em in my purse for perusal when I need an boost.

For rereading when I begin to meander down the path of questioning what on earth I’m doing (here. in general. in the big picture does my life have impact way).

As I experienced these mental-shifts a solution to my own malaise began to formulate.

But, before I share my cobbled together may or may not be a help to you blogging problems/solutions, I feel compelled to shout out to some bloggers who helped me (knowingly or not) generate the thoughts which follow.

I imagine they are people you already know/blogs you already read—-but if not please to drop by and show em some love:

Baglady

Eating Journey (now private) turned Sugarwand (now closed)

Charlotte of The Great Fitness Experiment

Workoutmommy

Quix

Cranky Fitness

Fitness & Spice

(Pasta Queen also started my bloggingwheels turning with her recent post about Ghosts of Past Bloggers)

MizFit Blogging Problem #1:

I recently came thisclose to snapping at the Tornado for interrupting me while I was struggling to think of a funny witty snarky thought-provoking mind-blowing post for what was essentially a pretty crappy giveaway.

Solution: There will be far, far fewer gives up in herre. Initially I said YES to the majority of the offers because the economy was in the proverbial crapper (is in the crapper? tomato tomaaahhhto).  I really adored being able to play MizFitOprah & toss free treats your way.

Sadly the strings attached to aforementioned free treats frequently morph into ROPES and the back & forth with PR reps has simply become too time consuming.  Specific words needing to be linked.  Certain turns of phrase must be used.  Revisions requested *after* the posts have run and Ive moved on to other things.  My own personal irrational need to make the posts NOT just “hey lookie here! you can with this thing!” but heartfelt.  It all conspires to be writing about which Im not passionate and, when I reflected upon why I blog, its because Im passionate about you & my soul is nurtured though writing. Im as passionate about some companies—but they are few and far between.  I need to remember that & always blog with a joyous heart.

MizFit Blogging Problem #2

My daughter woke the other night and called for me.  She was afraid of a thunderstorm.

As I rubbed her back in an effort to soothe my hand wandered down to her little four year old legs.  As I massaged them gently I felt the presence of teenytiny leg hairs emerging.

While it sounds like a ‘nothing’ encounter this was an amazingly powerful  moment for me.

She’s growing so quickly & will be in kindergarten soon.

As much time as we spend together (see fulltimewriterbyday & cross-reference under lack of childcare) I dont want to look back and wonder how much of that *seemingly* endless time was spent with “Hmmm, if at MizFit I tried…” lurking in the back of my mind.

Solution: Since work is a non-negotiable (I like to eat & have a roof over my head. Until the grocery takes Fitbloggin swag or free product as barter Im gonna stick with the  working part of my day.) Im going to change things up here.

Im not even sure that will translate to fewer posts a week (as I adore writing/blogging) but merely a shift to shorter posts.

MizFit Blogging Problem #3:

What are my goals? Why do I blog?  What on earth is the point?

As a woman who possesses multiple mission statements/an elaborate vision board the fact I didnt immediately know these answers surprised me.

solution:  Stop. Step back. Think about it.

I think for some of us blog malaise is merely a manifestation of being too busy with the rest of life and feeling an obligation to maintain our blog for our readers.  I think for others of us there was hope when we initially started blogging (a book? a tv show? moneymoney? a weight-loss transformation? The answers are as varied as there are bloggers on the net) which hasn’t yet come to fruition.

Most interesting to me is when Ive responded to emails from bloggers mired in malaise they frequently dont realize they even possess this ‘hopedream’ until we dig deep into their blogging motivation.

I spent lots of time pondering this question and, I think, have come up with my answer.  An answer which doesnt involve anything greater or more earth shattering than a simple desire to create a community where, together, we are greaterSTRONGER than the sum of our parts. For me there is no loftier goal or bigger point than that.

Oh People.

Seriously.

If you’ve made it to the end of this far too long post you, in fact, should receive a give away of sorts.

Ive wandered and rambled and meandered and ended up precisely where I started three years ago:

I blog because it’s an important part of expressing who I am & without it I’d feel as though I were missing a piece of myself.

And, for me, there’s no solution for the malaise stronger than the the realization of that.

(*whispers* here’s where Id ask for your thoughts/opinions if I hadnt already sucked up so much of your time. Skimmers? Speed readers? Skip-to-the-enders? please to find it in your hearts to hit us all up below…)

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Comments

  1. says

    Wow my head is swimming after reading this post. It turned out so well :) I struggle with these thoughts all the time and many times I think after nine years of DG what is the bloody point and who am I actually doing this for? Should I put some ads!?

    But just when I want to stop some thought will pop into my brain that I feel compelled to spew out to the world.

    Gotta say though, starting the podcast with you has brought the magic back into this nerdy habit :)

  2. says

    Im glad you’re sticking around!! I feel a bit ‘malaisey’ at the mo – good to be reminded that I want to actually LIVE my life rather than just write about it – however inarticulately and infrequently! I also want to be more than all about weight loss/healthy lifestyle…but then I can’t shake the fact this is a massive part of my life and has changed my life (i hope) irrevocably – and the blogospehere is a huge part of that….hmm….things to ponder….thanks miz! x

  3. says

    I, too, am so glad that you’ve decided to stay on. I don’t comment often, but read every post and want to let you know that you make a difference in many lives, my own included. I’ve felt that malaise off and on for a while – even disappeared for a while – and want to thank you for giving me a lot to think about! You’re awesome, Carla!

  4. says

    I’ve been feeling the same way lately – trying to figure out what it’s all about and remind myself what the point is. Glad to hear you’re sticking with it.

  5. says

    Glad you’re sticking around! I’ve definitely been in a blog slump most of the year. Life has been very busy, and when I have had time to write, I just wanted to relax instead of having to think.

    I do love when people take the time to read & comment when I blog. I love giving a voice to my thoughts and getting feedback from my readers. Perhaps I also need to examine my blog intentions/motivations again to rekindle my own passion for blogging.

  6. says

    I adore you, Carla. You are such an incredible mom, a wonderful writer, and a thoughtful and caring individual. I admit that I am very, very happy that you deleted that April 1st post – from a purely selfish perspective I would be greatly saddened if your presence were to be missing in the blogosphere – and I think you have come up with some excellent compromises to keep the parts of your life that you love in harmony with one another. I applaud you!

  7. Terrie says

    Holy long post MizFit :)

    Many of the reason s you mention are precisely why I am a reader and not a blogger.
    A few of my friends are big bloggers in the foodworld and the pr onslaughts really are a beating to them many days.

    Since I am not a blogger I guess I don’t grasp why they do not just say NO?

  8. Fitness Blogger says

    Hi Carla,

    I was one of those you mention who had not realized she was bitter about not “making it” as a blogger until you gently pointed that out to me.

    I wanted what I perceived others to have (an income from the blog, “status,” a book deal) and it began to make me resent my blog.

    Thanks so very much for your time (with me and in writing this post).

  9. says

    I think that the most important thing is being honest with yourself…and…if you decide to leave it…do it when you’re having fun.

    But I have to agree with you..a little part of me…loves a big part of blogging.

  10. Katie says

    I quit blogging after a similar experience to what you described with your Tornado.

    It was intruding on my life too too much and for now I am just a reader.

    A selfish reader as I would be heartbroken if you stopped.

  11. suganthi says

    I read all of it and I hope I understood it right. You are here for a bit.. right?
    I love coming to your space and reading whenever I can. I started tearing up at #1 and know that I have missed several magic moments as my children were growing up. I try to be mindful with my 10-year old, but I feel I need to do more. I am looking to move to a more 9-5 kind of job where I can come home and just focus on my family.

    Thank you for all your wonderful posts. Thanks to all bloggers who blog for whatever reason they chose to. They lift my spirits up when I most need it.

  12. says

    Wow, Mizfit giving up blogging! Noooooooooooooooooooo! I’m so glad you changed your mind. Yours is one of those blogs that you just know will always offer you something in return for the time you spend reading it (and no, I’m not talking about giveaways, because even if they weren’t all “USA only”, the other value from the blog is just worth so much more). Sometimes it is exercise advice, sometimes a new idea, sometimes it is just a little laugh, but mostly it is that huge dose of positivity that just exudes from your blog.

    To be frank, those readers (if there are any which I really don’t think there are) who are only reading for the giveaways, are not the important ones. Those giveaways are not life-changing, but the effect you have on people’s spirits and lives through your own “unapologetically myself” attitude is life changing – that is what your blog is about.

    The idea of making money from blogging is foreign to me – if you can do it, you certainly deserve it, but surely it is the “nurturing of souls”, yours and your readers is what makes it worth it.

    I also understand your comment about it interfering with family life, my blogging does too sometimes and mine would be a lot less time consuimg than yours, but to me, as I think yours is to you, blogging is some of my “me time”, and we need that. Balance is what we need.

    Shorter posts. Less frequent posts. Good responses. But stay, we need you.

    I agree 100% with your reason for blogging, it is mine too. As I said in my Two Fit Chicks contribution it is definitely about feeling a part of that community of like-minded people, and also feeling like your contributions are valued by that community. For me, and maybe for you, the feeling I get from those “healthy livers” on my blog and theirs seems all that more powerful than I get from some real life communities (work and social) I am a part of.

    A piece of myself. How true. For me, a very important piece.

    Carla, we love you, please don’t go anywhere. You are one of our rocks. You are one of our guides. You are one of our inspirations.

  13. Miz says

    peeking in as I start my day….please don’t make this about me and my blogging as I really do want to hear your thoughts/laments/and solutions.

    Don’t know about you ;) but I’m waaaay sick of me!

  14. says

    Miz.

    You know that as a person and a mother I would never begrudge you time and away’ness’. I love your writing, your comments and your etc.

    But, you do what you gotta do girl.

    You are (be)loved, and you always will be no matter what. Your time is so precious. Thank you for using it to make me and so many others feel better.

  15. says

    I know that I am another blogger who has whined your way about blogging.

    Now that I think back on that it is a little silly. I am not sure what I hope to gain from blogging and yet some days if I am honest I resent the time.

    I always love when you do the living not blogging posts.
    Maybe I need to do more of that.

    Helen

  16. says

    I contemplate it all of the time. I went from posting every day, to posting a few times a week to just posting when I feel like it.

    I read other blogs and the free stuff is really what is turning me off of blogging. I don’t want to read about giveaways. It’s not a community then. That’s just the big PR machine. It’s not genuine. It’s not real. It’s not human.

    Stuggles are what brought me here, are what keep me here and are what keep me writing. Since I can’t figure out my weight loss thing completely, I’ll probably always be around in one form or another.

    I hope you will be too.

  17. Bea says

    I agree about the free stuff.

    Some posts when I read them I think “is this an advertisement??” (and I have opften wondered if bloggers are getting paid for those? how would we as readers know?) yet there are others where I read them and they ring authentic and I want to try the product.

    I do not read blogs for free treats and it depresses me a little when I visit blogs and see millions of comments and only on giveaway posts.

  18. says

    Ohyes, I’ve been suffering from a little blog malaise as of late. I have a million obligations, and often ask myself, “why am I blogging when I should be doing thisthisandthis?” But the same answer always comes up – I LOVE IT. My day-job is as a writer for an institution, but I don’t get to write about the things I love. On my blog, I do. And the daily interaction I have with the people out in blogland fills my heart up and makes me happy.

    But I always say – a happy blogger is a happy reader. People don’t want to read forced posts, they want to read something the blogger put some thought and heart into :)

  19. says

    I am only now discovering the importance of having a blog vision. I am struggling with mine, because I want to increase my traffic. Of course it would be nice to make money off of the blog, but I honestly want to increase traffic because I want to reach out to people. I want to build a community. So I keep just blogging and seeing where it goes, and trying to read and comment on other blogs as often as possible, and I hope that translates one day into a real Skinny Sushi community.

    If only I could get paid for my real passion, my book writing…

  20. says

    So glad to hear you’re in a better place and are figuring out a way to to fit blogging into your life! You are so inspirational and really have changed so many lives for the better. Everyone would miss you terribly if you stopped.

    (I’ve been, and will continue to be after this comment, in “lurk”mode–my relationship to blogging and the online world got so messed up I had to Just Say No, so I don’t even comment on my favorite blogs anymore. Some day maybe I’ll return to the blogging community–perhaps when I figure out how to balance life & blogging as well as you do. Twitter just ain’t the same).

  21. says

    I’ve been blog malaise-y here and there over the 1 1/2 yrs. that I’ve been blogging. My blog started as accountability for myself. As it grew, I got emails and comments from readers saying how they could relate to my struggles, how they enjoy seeing what I eat and liked that I gave them new food ideas. That’s when it got tricky. The people- pleaser in me cannot let people down. So in my very small blogging universe, I began to feel responsible to these readers. If I didn’t post, I felt like I let them down. It’s a strange feeling because honestly, I don’t have a big ego. I don’t think that people are hanging on my every word and anxiously anticipating my every post. Yet, when I didn’t post, I would always start my next one with “I’m so sorry I didn’t post last night/the pastcoupledays, etc.” I realized that is kinda dumb. I don’t need to apologize! I usually “explain”, but stopped apologizing. Readers understand. They’re just as busy and feel the pull of life in the real world, too.
    Okay, to end this novel I am writing in your comments, my solution for my blogging malaise was to post when I can, take off when I need to (pretty much weekends are blog-free), don’t worry about traffic (I finally realized I am just one in a sea of bloggers!) and ENJOY LIFE!. Blogging is a huge part of my life and very fun for me, but REAL LIFE is way better ;)

    I know you’ll find what helps you! This community would NOT be the same w/o YOU!

  22. says

    MizFit! WOW! The heart of blogging struggles, just like weight loss and exercise! The importance of family, community and PEOPLE! But it is also the struggle of parents. How to pay the bills AND enjoy family! You often speak of meditation. My meditation is my writing. It takes me to another place AND it is blogs like yours, that give me my daily motivation to become a better person. In the long run, that is what parents teach their kids. Discipline, family is important but so are those individual pursuits and self- accomplishments! Thank you for deciding to stay!

  23. Lori says

    Glad your sticking around! I don’t comment much, but I do read your blog all the time.
    I can’t even imagine how much time blogging must take up. One of the reasons I don’t comment more is the whole time factor. I have a few blogs I like to read daily. I read them while I have my morning coffee before the kids get up. After that I want to get on with my day and be out living, not tied to my computer (though it does happen!). So, thanks for sticking around and starting my day off good!

  24. A Blogger says

    You nailed it for me when you mentioned stores not taking product as payment.

    It is not a money thing for me (I am fortunate that way) it is a RESPECT thing.

    I have stopped accepting product or even responding to PR inquiries because I felt companies wantd me to be GRATEFUL for free product when I felt they were by far getting the better end of the deal.

    I blog with as you say a ‘joyous heart’ now.

  25. dragonmamma says

    What, no give-aways? I’m outta here…April Fools!

    I’ve checked out blogs for the first time because of give-aways, but that’s not why I stick around. For the time-suck involved, I doubt that it’s worth it, for either the writer or the reader.

  26. Aubry says

    I think your answer to people being malaised is that its 5am and you have so many comments.

    As others have stated that’s why I do not blog.

  27. says

    Bottom line–Do what YOU want to do. Forget about your readers. Your family and yourself are the lot God has given you. If that lot is tended and you have the time, energy and heart desire to reach out and help others then and only then do it.

    You run your blog the way you want–no compromise.

    If you want to take a blogging break–do it. Forget about your readers. They will wait until you are ready to return to blogging. They–we–I–am not worth the investment you place in us over the investment you place in yourself and your family. You only have a few short years on this earth–never forget that.

    Does that sound selfish? It’s not. It’s wise. No one can be all things to all people. And if you try, you are in trouble.

    We live in a world that is becoming increasingly ridiculous–the technology will suck the life out of us if we let it.

    Here’s a test I use: I compare what the tongue in my mouth says to the tongue in my shoe. The shoe tongue never lies. If it says ‘RUN AWAY”–I heed it.

    What is the tongue in your shoes saying?

  28. says

    Blogging sure does take on a life of it’s own after awhile. There have been many atimes when I’ve been ready to push delete – and it has only been 2 years. Yet somewhere in the process, I am reminded I blog for the community I get from blogging. I am reminded that I blog for the thereputic expression I get. And I am reminded of the amazing people I meet – like you.

    Thanks for such a thought-provoking post today lady! Make this blog what YOU need, not what we need.

  29. says

    Yeah, I’m sitting here reading blogs right now while my 2 year old and 7 year old are fighting over who loves Curious George more. Umm, if I didn’t have blogging, I’d go insane.

    I don’t have balance when it comes to writing. I know, it’s terrible, but I don’t. It’s a priority of mine every day to put finger to keyboard. And throughout the day I tweet or answer email from my phone. And the worst part of all that is, I don’t ever EVER question it. It’s just part of me right now to be connected to my writing and my followers. I multitask a LOT.

    But, I am also present a LOT. You have heard me say things about unplugging, putting down the phone, taking a day off. And sometimes my kids are a part of it all with me; they appear in VLOGS and give me things to write about.

    The bottom line for me is that in my heart of hearts I am no so good at this stay at home mom biz. My love for my kids knows no boundary, it’s not that. I just need to mix it up with other stimulations. I don’t spend hours on facebook, I hate talking on the phone, and I don’t get a sitter everyday so I can be a lady who lunches. But I do reserve a couple of hours every day to write and tweet and connect. For now, it works.

    ANNNNND, I would hate it if you stopped. I have not had enough MizFit yet.

  30. says

    The question of “why I blog” is a curious one to me. It’s surprising how many bloggers start saying that it’s taking up too much of their time or that they don’t know what to write about etc etc… I don’t know, I guess I feel that if blogging seems like a CHORE, then why do those people continue to do it? To me it’s a delight. Sure, it would be great if I could get paid to blog, but at the same time, it’s just FUN and, like you say, it’s about building a community and sharing ideas and knowledge. That, to me, is what it’s all about. And when bloggers feel as though they’re “forced” to blog even when they don’t want to, I wonder if their posts are as sincere as they used to be.

    That’s just my $0.02.

    I’m really glad that you’re still going to blog, Miz, and that you were able to take a look at the obstacles and figure out solutions to them. Thanks for sharing all of this! We all appreciate it and are HERE WITH YOU.

  31. says

    I am really happy that that swan song was not sang! (and yes I am truly aware of the grammatical nightmare that is)

    I also totally get the whole premise about stopping the blogging bit and getting sucked back in. Then my realization hits me yet as again, as did yesterday, why I blog and I will not allow myself to get sucked into the whole swag, sponsorship thing…I blog for me!

    xoxo

  32. says

    It would really be a sad day if we lost your blogging skilz.

    When you mentioned to me a few months ago that you were questioning your blogging direction/motivation, I felt your pain. My blog is small, I don’t have many readers, and there have been many times when I’ve wanted to quit. I’ve had many “who am I, and why am I doing this” moments.

    Each time I feel this way, something is sparked inside of me that makes me excited to blog again. Just before Fitbloggin, I considered shutting my whole site down. I was over it. Then, I went to Fitbloggin. Since then, I’ve begged for a bike (didn’t happen, but I found a cheap one instead), identified my next LOFTY goal, received a sweet offer from a company to do something really cool (hello, vague!), became a Hollaback Health blogger, and posted videos of myself swimming. More has happened in my Bloglife in the past 3 weeks than has happened over the previous 1.5 years.

    The unity of our little niche of health/fitness/weight loss bloggers at Fitbloggin inspired me to think outside of the little box that I was in. The togetherness made me want to stop being comfortable and start getting the STUFF that I wanted. But also, you pushed me to do that. Courage and confidence is not innate to some of us. We need others to give us that extra ‘youcandoit’ push. You are that push for so many of us, and although I’d support any decision that would make YOU happy, I’d be really sad if you left Mizfitonline!

  33. Karen says

    I am stuck on your answer about if you stopped you would miss a piece of yourself.

    I do not blog.
    I wonder if this is the piece I am missing?

  34. says

    I started blogging for connections. Connections to like-minded people who care about living a healthy life. I’ve made those types of connections but sometimes I wonder why I do it especially on those days when I hear crickets in the comments section.

    I get no financial compensation for blogging but it is very rewarding. We agree on that, don’t we?

    I will not blog when it’s not fun anymore or when I’m missing out on life.

    Reality checks in all areas of our lives are important. Even blogging.

  35. Karen says

    especially on those days when I hear crickets in the comments section.
    ——————————————————
    I’m back and quoting from your comments section LOL

    I know I always assumed you would never feel malaise as you call it because you get comments.

  36. says

    We have discussed this A LOT, so you know how i feel. I am so glad you will be continuing with Mizzy, cuz we love you.

    I TOTALLY get all the points you mentioned, I have struggled with the same on Fitarella and have decided to make a few changes of my own :) Thanks for putting this out there. xoxo

  37. says

    I think you should only continue to blog if you think you are getting as much out of it as we are. If it’s not fun, or if you feel obligated to do it, then you should stop and have something that will make you happy.

    With that said though, I’m glad you’ve decided to stick around :) My blogging experience has become so much more than just talking about my weight loss, and you are a big part of that growth.

  38. says

    MizFit, I don’t comment on your blog much because I don’t like to comment for commenting sake. But I’m commenting to let you know that you do make a difference. You inspire people. To improve. To better themselves. To run marathons.

    I’m glad you write because you put yourself out there. For people to hate, for people to love, and that’s just naked truth right there. It’s inspirational and respectable. So I’m thankful you’re sticking around :)

    Keep the posts coming! Maybe less, maybe shorter, change it up. Make it like a work out, a writing work out.

  39. says

    Let me just get this out of the way and chime in with I’m glad you didn’t throw out the baby with the bathwater! Stick around and make this work for YOU (and not just because I’d miss you if you didn’t blog).

    That said, I don’t blog every day – most of the time it’s M/W/F, and that’s enough for me. It was tough at the beginning of the year when so many giveaways hit my inbox and I said yes (never again) – HAVING to write a post on something that I was not incredibly enthusiastic about, yet thought might make one of my reader’s day by winning, got hard very fast and I felt a little resentment. And YES, I have had to work in specific phrases and links (hello, CSN and your dumb barstools link)…never again, unless the product thrills the hell out of me. Shoot, I got so bored with one product I was trying out that I never wrote about it!

    And I’ve found that while there are blogs who have a lot of giveaways (and I’ve bookmarked them specifically for that reason), those aren’t the ones I read for content. I need content more than giveaways, and I’d much rather read what you have to say about life over a product (unless said product is spectacular).

    (That said, I am stunned and envious by the bloggers who get major kitchen appliances and CARS for free!)

    I started blogging to remember my journey. I am so glad I can look back and see where I was and how I felt about certain things, and it’s helped me get back to what works for me when I get a little derailed. And the support, the blogging community? Priceless. I’ve come to depend on it.

    Alright, wordymcworderson will end this now. Have a wonderful day, Carla!

  40. says

    As others have said, the giveaways actually turn me off most of the time. As the companies are often telling the blogger how to promote the product. I’d prefer it be something the blogger LOVES and totally believes in, no strings attached.

    I think when it stops being fun or gets in the way of living life with your family it is good to take a step back. Folks will still have you in their Google Reader and cheer every time you do a new post…. as it will be because you WANT to, not because you HAVE to…. cause those ones you want to do are often the best ones. :-)

  41. says

    I’m still so new to blogging that I haven’t experienced this (yet). But I do appreciate your post. For one, I’m glad you didn’t quit. Secondly, it’s good to know that even the greats get burnout. I’ll have to save this for that day in the future where I’m questioning my own motives.

  42. Laughing Lindsay says

    You never realize how much you’re learning at the time until a little pearl of wisdom pops into your mind as you’re going throughout your day. So many things you’ve said on your blog literally make a daily impact on me, and so many others.
    Your knowledge that you’ve shared has helped me though an eating disorder, making healthier food choices (realizing I CAN eat and still be lean) and development of a new self love with vision boards, boxes under my bead, and time for myself, and quick visits to the gym.
    That being said, the giveaways have not impacted me at all. I typically skim them or don’t read the post.
    If those take valuable time away from Tornado, my opinion? No loss at all. Take the time with her and never look back.
    Shorter posts make sense as well. Your daughter needs this time with you, and vise versa. Embarrassing to admit but, I’d honestly feel a little lost if you left your blog, but it ain’t about me. So a compromise sounds perfect.
    HUGE HUGS Miz….. you are incredible.

  43. says

    Blogging saved my sanity and helped me through a rough patch in my life. I am still amazed at all the wonderful people I’ve met and connected with through this online community, and am grateful every day for people (like you!) who continue to come to my blog and make comments on even the most mundane of my (ever-decreasing) posts.

    This was a terrific, thought-provoking post, Carla, and touched a chord in me. I started blogging because I was feeling isolated and alone, and it provided me with a whole new sense of belonging and being a part of a community. Thank you for being a part of that, and for being the caring, intelligent, thoughtful, incredible person you are!

    As my “real” life becomes increasingly busy, my blogging life has slipped a little, but I would miss my blog-buddies too much to quit completely, so I have been trying to balance everything as best I can. I may not be managing it all that well, because I haven’t always got time to make comments, but I do try to always read and stay caught up with most of my blog friends.

    (Thanks, too, for linking to my little blog!)

  44. melissa says

    As long as you’re writing from your heart and doing what feels right to you, you will always have an audience. No one’s reading you for the freebies.

  45. says

    unfortunately FitBloggin did the complete opposite for me, I’ve become even more turned off by this “community”. I felt a lot of people were there to promote themselves so that they could take themselves, their blog to the next level. since then i’ve cut back on Twitter and blogging.

    or perhaps it has to do with the fact that I am living life more now that I’ve gotten some of my baggage out of the way.

    I guess only time will tell.

  46. says

    I started my blog for me and me only. I allowed the world in on my thoughts and feelings. It was never for commercial purposes and likely never will be. In fact, I’m really still mystified as to the process to monetize my blog even if I wanted to. That being said, my blog is still really for me and me only. I am; however, deriving great satisfaction that my journey is meaningful to others and ultimately if I can become more popular, it would only be for the greater satisfaction of helping more and more people.

  47. Annie says

    I would love to say that the longer I blog the more great people I meet.

    The oppositge has been my experience in a way.

    Lots of shamless self promotion and not real people.

  48. says

    I’ve been toying with writing a similar blogging malaise post for weeks now. I feel like I’ve gotten roped in with a “crowd” in the blog world in which I don’t belong, and am feeling a very large “why bother” because well, I don’t fit in. Which is part of why I think you and I get along so well!

    I’ve had a realization though: my readers will stay my readers whether I post every day or not… so I’m opting towards not, and just having better posts when i do.

  49. says

    You were thinking of leaving us??? nooooooo! Thank goodness for fitbloggin to keep you here! My thoughts for you would be to blog on less of a schedule. Do it when you can, spend time with your lovely little peanut and man when you want! We will be here to read when you post :)

  50. says

    I think it is time to take your blog to the next level and make some serious money for your efforts. Your message is the best in the industry. People need to pick-up more of what you are putting down. Getting people to think and find solutions catered to their needs and wants. To be healthy you are going to have to make some sacrifices, but finding solutions that make sense for them individually.

    I say more meat and make people pay for some of it because you are providing a service to them.

  51. says

    This post made me think a little more about something I had already been thinking about. Blog post coming soon.

    That said, your motivations can get messed with. The competitive side of me, which I do not cater to, sometimes wants more comments just for the sake of having more comments.

    Loved Shelley’s comment, especially her sign off ‘wordymcworderson .’ I actually think that is why a lot of us blog–we have too many words for our husbands/friends/family/co-workers.

  52. says

    Oh my dear Miz whom I adore, I feel your pain. Even though I don’t comment daily anymore, I still read you daily (and don’t feel bad, I have cut waaayyy back on all my commenting because I could literally spend all day commenting) and even if there were never another giveaway or a post longer than a dozen words, I would still read you because you are my friend (virtual or otherwise) and I always worry when I don’t hear from my friends. I’ve become invested in the lives of Miz and the Tornado and even the RenMan!
    You do what you need to do and if that means one post per week, then so be it. We will all be here once a week if that’s what it takes. :) XOXOXO

  53. says

    Very good. You have a talent and much insight to offer, BUT you are right. If blogging is starting to get annoying it is time to cut the annoying parts. I have found that *most* companies who want to give away stuff respond pretty well to my response: “Sure, I will review your thing and giveaway your stuff, but it will be an honest review, within 6 months, and that’s all.” No special linked words or guarantees. Maybe that’s why I have less giveaways but this way, it doesn’t *affect* me.

    That said, we come here for you, not the giveaways :)
    Although everyone does love a good giveaway, that’s not the main attraction!

  54. says

    ” blog because it’s an important part of expressing who I am & without it I’d feel as though I were missing a piece of myself.”

    This is very important (see- I made it to the end!). Blogging is such a personal venture. I think if people start a blog thinking they are going to make money, or that it is really easy and they will get tons of followers find out in very short order that is not the case.

    Blogs that speak from the heart are the successful ones that I love to read day in and day out. They don’t have to be full of giveaways or facts or even fun. Sometimes the best posts are where a person is meandering around trying to form thoughts – like the one you just posted.

    That said, there are times when we just put too much pressure on ourselves to fit some perceived entity that we need to be for our readers, when all we have to do is be ourselves.

  55. says

    I am where I am today, moving up to 50 pound dumbbells on Monday, because of you MIZ!!!! You have given me that lift when I need it. Your comments, your emails, all have been sooooooo much appreciated.

    I blog for accountability, I have a rather boring blog but I can’t help but think that if one person takes a look at my before and after Pics or hears me talk about my lifting, or my walks or my bicycle rides that it might help to get them moving. If they read about my mistakes in my food choices and how I just move on and try harder, that just maybe it might help them.

  56. says

    Ditto.

    Huge ditto.

    Ditto with an exclamation mark!

    Sometimes I just don’t know. But I can’t quit. I love it. Blogging helps me. It’s my expression. It’s great. It also helps pay the bills. Not sure if I’m sad or glad about that.

  57. says

    I am fairly new to blogging and for a long time had no idea that blogging could be a “business.” I still don’t understand that and am probably better off not knowing.

    I started blogging to have somewhere to write down my thoughts about life, how to change and improve my life and failures and successes with weight loss. I was very surprised when other people started reading it and commenting.

    I read a lot of blogs and I love them all, people are so different and everyone has a story.

    Loved reading your insights into why you do this, what wasn’t working and how you are going to change it. Great job Carla!!!

  58. says

    First of all, I am honored by the link love. :) To be on that short list makes my Friday.

    I had a sort of blog-altering event when two months ago work went from “bleh-I’m-overqualified-for-this-and-wanna-get-out” to being asked to step up and take things over. Before, I was trying to figure out how to work this writing thing into a career because damned if I couldn’t stand where I was at professionally. It just took a few key things to happen to make me realize that it wasn’t the career path I resented, it was the specific situation I was in. Once that went away, the love came back.

    Now, I’m just doing all I can to not fade away. I still have plenty to say, and honestly? It keeps me accountable to my goals and training and progress to put it all out there. I feel cleansed to sometimes spill my guts. But for now? A professional I’ll never be. I’ll work on my novel in the background and I’ll blog about fried chicken and running and those damn last x amount of lbs and not worry about it.

    Now Miz, I would read your blog even if you never gave away another damn thing and plastered viagra ads on the banner bars to keep food on the table. What you say is powerful enough to shine through that.

  59. MizFit says

    ok, so I read every.single.comment as they come in (I adore my handheld for that) even when I dont immediately jump into the fray.

    Quix? I read your comment as saying:

    plastered VAGINA ads on the banner bars to keep food on the table.

    I almost fell over.

  60. Nikki says

    Thanks for sharing!
    We all come here and enjoy your blog for a reason and mine is because you are real! I know not everything can be shared but you(& others) share what you can about your life and your wisdom, your adventures and your struggles…and it’s empowering! I leave feeling normal yet stronger and most times with a nugget of wisdom for the day.

    My advice…do what you can, when you can and the family has to come first! I and I’m sure everyone here understands where you’re coming from. A lot of times, LESS is MORE!
    Cheers

  61. says

    >plastered VAGINA ads on the banner bars to keep food on the table.

    Those too. Although…gotta say that would be a little more distracting. And hey – you might be able to expand your readership… ;)

  62. Karen says

    I almost don’t get the point of blogging when it isn’t all about you!
    I used to blog and loved it and my blog was all about my family.
    I would want to be paid if I were just blogging about general stuff.

  63. Kate says

    I just started reading your blog and would miss you if you stopped blogging.

    However, this is your blog so you need to make sure it fits your life. No use driving yourself crazy or making yourself miserable–blogging should be fun!

    We’ll all be hear to read what you write no matter how many times a week you update!

  64. says

    I think we all have moments like this of thinking are we spending to much time here but I say we need what makes us happy or we can make the people around us happy. Sometimes it does mean limiting blogging more but stopping, I couldn’t imagine it. Glad you’re going to hang in there with us it just wouldn’t be the same without you.

  65. says

    Do you realize how many woman/men you just encouraged to get out of the ugly part of blogging to stay in the happy zone? You have set a fine standard here.

    My family is first – I have a coloring book date with my son tonight.

    And those damn gives. Aaargh! Yes. very irritating some are. I have cut back too. My last one was of my own design – funded & supplied by ME. No PR product involved. I like those much better.

    P.S. I admit to being a skimmer speed reader sometimes, but this post had 100% of eyeballs attention. All the way to the end…. kaBOOM!

  66. Stacey says

    I think you should sell more stuff. Would you feel better if you made money?

    I’ve found affiliate marketing to be kickass for my sites.

  67. says

    Carla, you were the first blogger to write back to me a personal email when I first started commenting on blogs. Crap, it made my day! MizFit is huge & she is writing to me!!!!! I was so happy!

    I don’t care if you blog less or shorter.. whatever is right for you & that you can handle “for you” & nobody else. As long as you stick around somewhere. Saying that, if it is one day not right for you, you have to follow your heart too BUT I would read you know matter how short because even your shortest posts have more meaning in them than you can know for us out here.

    Do what feels right for you. Who cares about the giveaways. Yes, nice to win stuff but I am reading the blogs for the great info & THE GREAT PEOPLE out there!

    I will take you in any form you choose to be in! :-)

  68. says

    I think I read this post before – (from numerous sources though also from you) it may have been a couple of years since your malaisia post.

    I’ve noticed that the creative urge/spark comes and goes. When it feels like work and you aren’t getting paid, it sucks wads. Creativity shouldn’t feel like work. It’s supposed to be fun. Creativity in and of itself can be enough pay. I’m down to two posts per week. I can’t find much more creativity than that and if I felt forced to write daily (due to audience demand), I’d have to stop. After all, I have my own leg hair to consider.

  69. says

    I read lots more than I blog. Actually, love your comment section as a great tool. Who needs a post when you have awesome commentors?

    Very thought provoking.

  70. says

    You are the Queen of practicing what you preach!!! You took a step back and evaluated your “Why”!! I am selfishly happy that you stayed!! But please know, if you ever need a “Hiatus” WE love you enough to let you go!! You are such an amazing Mother/writer/blogger/podcaster/Friend!!! I am living “Better” in Large Part BECAUSE OF YOU!!!!!
    Love You Lots!!!!
    Dr. Mo

  71. says

    It’s funny you write this because I had a bit of the malaise-y feeling this week, so I took the Spring Break as a chance to kick back a bit.
    I’ll be honest – I like having readers. So I sometimes get stressed out about not having earth-shattering posts all the time. But I learned this week that it’s okay not to always be incredibly introspective. The people who love you and your blog will still be there after you have a week of “I’m off to the zoo today!” posts.
    That took a lot of pressure off me – which helped get rid of the malaise-y’s for me – which helps me get back to writing some (hopefully) earth-shattering posts!

  72. Tisha says

    Thanks for posting EXACTLY what I’m been feeling for six months. When I get home from work the last thing I want to touch is a computer keyboard. Blogging about gaining weight isn’t too much fun either. Combine them both and my symptoms are beyond malaise.

    What I *love* about you most Miz…is that you’re honest and you write about it.

  73. says

    I’m glad you’re stickin’ around. I love your style, you’re REAL. If we get fewer posts, or shorter posts, or lessfreestuff posts, then so be it. It’s YOUR blog and you can do what you want with it! Again, so glad you’re stickin’ around!!!

  74. MizFit says

    thank you thank you ALL OF YOU who have chimed in, shared agreed and disagreed.

    xo xo

  75. says

    Chiming in as comment 92!
    I love writing and sharing knowledge and insight with the world and reading others’ knowledge and insight.
    That said, sometimes it does feel, as one blogger put it, like “feeding the beast”.
    Maybe I am just tired at the end of a long week too…
    9 weight loss

  76. says

    I cannot even tell you how many times I have gotten caught up in the whirlwind of blogging.
    Lessons I have learned…
    It is only as big and demanding as I think it is.
    No one is going anywhere if I do not post all of the time.
    There are no expectations other than the ones I have for myself.
    My fab fatties blog getting hacked was a blessing in disguise. It made me have to get back to the basics and I am perfectly happy being basic ;)
    Great post Miz as usual! Have a wonderful weekend with that beautiful tornado.
    XO

  77. says

    I am only at the beginning of this blogging thing, but it has so powerfully affected my life. I feel like I am finding ME. This awesome community and wonderful friend/superhero/mentors like you have impacted my life in ways I cannot begin to express. I am glad you are sticking around, and yes that is probably entirely selfish!

  78. says

    Miz, love you like crazy. You’re HONEST and REAL and TRUE and one of the few blogs that really feels like you and your Bumbling Band is a true COMMUNITY.

    *mwah!*

  79. says

    Miz, love ya, read you in my email everyday and bottom line you should always write for yourself, no matter what it is. My blog is a living journal of sorts, I could never keep a paper one for some reason, I’d start…then years later pick it up (read what I wrote and laugh hysterically!)

    One day (maybe not so far away) we should meet. :)

  80. says

    what a wonderful, heartfelt post. i can see why you would want to walk away, but i’m glad that you stayed. you add A LOT to this community.

  81. says

    “I would read you in a box,
    And I would read you with a fox….”

    Carla, for as long as you’re writing and we can get access to your writing somehow, I’ll be reading and commenting. I wish I could just leave it at that, but I have to chime in with the rest: you’ve made a HUGE different in how I’ve come to approach health and fitness, blogging, and even life in general. What you’ve made here is special.

    I’ve had to become more choosy about my social media time. Between blogging, reading blogs, commenting, Tweeting, and using Facebook, social media overload was starting to make me feel scattered and stressed, even without the pressure to spin blogging/commenting/etc. into food on the table. I’ve cut way back on all of the above.

    But I don’t think I’ll ever give up participating in the health and fitness online community. It’s become my “third place”, “social surroundings separate from the two usual social environments of home and the workplace.” The act of blogging for me has become an open letter to good friends, a place to blather about things that would make my in-real-life people’s eyes glaze over, a place of accountability, and one way to participate in a community of people with similar struggles and triumphs. When I started, my “hopedream” was (1) to have a record to keep me accountable and to which I could refer back over time and (2) to put my experience out there and hopefully help others facing the double-whammy of disease and weight loss, if only to let them know they weren’t alone. Sure, I went through phases of wanting to make more of it, but with day job and family vying for a piece of me–as well as bloggers (not just you) I perceived as successful bemoaning how little one actually makes from blogging–that idea died pretty quickly. (Although it was probably the solicitation to promote some wacky weight loss pills on my blog–duly ignored–that was the final nail in that coffin.)

  82. says

    You are amazing. I read your blog all the time but rarely leave a comment, which is a real disservice. I adore you. :)

    The only reason I don’t comment…you get so many comments I don’t know how on earth you could ever read them all. Yet I usually feel guilty because you have such great advice and suggestions that have helped me personally to succeed at this.

    Simply put, you’re the best! I can’t imagine blog world without you…and I hope I never have to. :)

  83. says

    Hey Carla! The epitime of you, heartfelt, honest, loving.

    Could say so much, I love to read your posts. So glad you are out there lady. You are great.

  84. says

    I’m fortunate in that I didn’t have the pressure of trying to earn a living from the weight loss/maintenance blogging thing. I’ve considered putting up some ads (and may do it at some point if my unemployment continues), but my main focus has always been sharing my own experiences and trying to participate in the community in at least some marginally helpful way. If I had to get into the competitive, network-y aspect of it, I think some of the joy would be lost. (I’m not sure I would be as good as you are at getting myself back to center.)

  85. cammi99 says

    I consider each blog post a gift. Can’t imagine putting myself out “there” like you do, but I’m glad you do. Thank you.

  86. says

    I’m glad you are sticking with it but not allowing it to consume you. Blogging should be enjoyable.

    I love your real posts that teach me more about how to take care of my body and how much you love this community. I could care less about a giveaway :-)

  87. says

    Hey Miz! When I read the title, I knew I had to read it- what a great term “Blogger Malaise”. Should find its way into the DSM-V (or IV, I forget which one we’re on!? ha ha!)

    I am but a mere baby blogger and I’ve only been doing it since August, but I hear you on the commitment it takes. I have referred to it as a “the Blortex”. I love your analogy of the mafia. Made me LOL for sure!

    When I started blogging I set a limit on my blogging to every other day. Then a couple of months ago, I realized that I was going to be doing a bunch of traveling and I have some family health issues that are very uncertain right now. So I knew I’d have to cut back even more!! Now I only post every ??4 days perhaps. It’s better but I still find it hard to disconnect….I WANT to see what my peeps are up to, and I want to go and shout “WELL HEYEEYYYY!” and comment, but then I dive head-first into the Blortex again.

    So I’m still trying to work on the balance. I think that’s what we’re all striving for. Balance. We’re no good if we have nothing left to give those around us- whether virtual or live.

    Sending you happy vibes for continuing to feel the bloggy love. :-)

  88. says

    So (selfishly) glad that you decided to deleted your April 1st post!

    You gotta do what you gotta do, but I couldn’t agree more with the last line – I blog because it’s an important part of expressing who I am. LOVE.

  89. says

    Just stumbled upon your blog and clearly you’ve hit home with so many as seen in their comments. Hang around…..here’s one new follower that’s looking forward to reading your stuff. I’m a beginner blogger and I love to get new followers; feels pretty cool. Hope you feel the same!

  90. says

    i can’t even consider blog land without you.

    but i hear you on the oh how fast it goes. its not a cliche, its a big ole no avoiding it life lesson (says the mom of a very cool 14 year old – yes they do exist).

    stay..but on your terms. being apologetically you.

    cuz that’s why we love you

    xo

  91. Blogger says

    I have blogged for a long time now and my enthusiasm comes and goes.

    Now that I think about it for me it is all about the commenting.
    If I write a post and no one responds I feel frustrated and verging on angry.

    I am really surprised to read that you ever struggle with “blogging malaise” since you receive many comments!!

  92. says

    I was just getting over blogging last year… and ironically I’ve just started a new blog. Today! Then I read this in my RSS reader and remembered some of the reasons why I gave it away….

    …. it boils down to focus for me. I lost it – for the topic I used to blog about – because my life changed so dramatically and it just didn’t fit in. But now I’m taking a new, slower approach because I did miss some of the things that blogging did for me – like learning from others, sharing things I think are wonderful, and spreading positivity and support.

    I’m not too fussed about how often I’ll post on my new blog, and I’m happy to let it evolve (and die if necessary) but my first post is up and I’m ready to make it work for me and not against me.

    P.S. I haven’t quite ready the whole 113 comments above, but the handful I have read have been great food for thought (pun intended).

  93. says

    I kept reading and reading saying, “Please don’t stop blogging, how could you stop blogging, I just found you don’t stop blogging” all the while saying I just started a new blog and haven’t posted in a week, but I still have more to say, and why am I doing it?” Phew.

    I look forward to every word (including tomato tomaaahhhto) and am glad I get to look forward to more. And the podcast. Which I love.

  94. says

    Man oh man, how many times have we had this discussion together? Tweaking and evolving is always good, even/especially with blogs. I hope we both make some changes we love. :)

  95. says

    First – THANK YOU THANK YOU for the props. They mean so much to me coming from you:) I didn’t see this post until just today as I took an unplanned Internet vacay for the past 3 days. (It was lovely and yes due to the blogger malaise you so eloquently described).

    Second – Reading through your post and allllll the amazing comments/suggestions on here really got me thinking. About so much. I love the changes you are making. I love your honesty. I love that you are, unapologetically, you.

  96. says

    Oh my goodness, I feel this kind of “ick” a lot and I don’t have nearly the following you have.

    There are days when I feel like I’m talking to myself. And that can be discouraging.

    There are days when I shoo my own 4 year old away while I’m on the ‘puter. And that’s no good.

    More often than not, I feel like I have nothing of value to say. And that keeps me from saying anything.

    And then I’ll get a kick ass comment and that reminds me that I’m in this for community, not just to get millions of readers.

    I wish I was better at coming up with content though.

  97. says

    I’ve been gone myself for so long that I didn’t realize you were thinking of leaving. I’m glad you’re sticking around. (Also, don’t take this negatively, but I’m glad you’re easing up on the giveaways. I missed your VOICE. I can get my own STUFF, but I can’t go out and buy your voice, you know? ;D)

  98. says

    I’m very glad you have decided to continue blogging. Your posts are inspiring and I enjoy reading them.

    I think I’ve become addicted to blogging! LOL! But I must admit, I am not posting as often as I started out. Partly because, when I started, I was blogging about my weight loss, but now I am at a healthy weight that I am happy to be maintaining, so my journey (and my writing of such) has had to change. The other part of the reason is similar to yours in that I don’t want to feel as though I’ve missed out on any quality time with my children. They are so young now, but the time goes by faster than you can blink. (I know this because I also have teenagers, and I think all the time it took between them being toddlers and becoming teenagers was the blink of an eye.)

    But I realized something which is what has kept me blogging, even when I don’t feel as if I have as much to say. As the weight came off me, I realized something about myself, and that was that I was actually capable of achieving something that looked insurmountable, and I mostly did it through the strength of my own will. I found out I had a strength I had previously been unaware of and that empowered me in a way that felt new and fresh and immensely gratifying. And that’s what made me realize that I want to share this with others. I want other women to feel inspired and capable of achieving great things, because we all are capable of changing the world, of changing ourselves and of being STRONG.

Trackbacks

  1. [...] Occasionally, I read a blog that just screams at me. Today I was over at MizFit’s house and I let me tell ya first how much I absolutely LOVE Miz. I was super excited to meet Carla at Fitbloggin and she was just as amazing in person as she is on her blog.  Anyhoo…I swear Carla wrote today’s post knowing it is exactly what I needed. Go read her post. [...]