Once upon a time, I was offered an AMAZING OPPORTUNITY.
I couldnt believe it.
I was excited.
I looked at my
stack of post-it’s fancy formalized mapped out schedule and deduced I could not say yes.
I was committed (kids stuff). I was busy with deadlines (work stuff). I could not fit another thing in.
I remember sharing the above my husband and his responding:
You should never be so busy you’re incapable of adding another thing. You need to build in space so if a cool opportunity arises you can say yes.
I knew he was right when he said it.
I made the opportunity work—but not without significant juggling.
I knew he was right when he said it—-yet for some reason his phrasing didnt spark an AH HA! moment.
Flash forward a few years (ahhh MizFit. will you really be 6 next month?!) & I found myself in the same position:
Impending move. Stressed out child who needed more FOCUSED her-time with a PRESENT mama. Work deadlines.
I was backed into a corner as the phrase goes.
I assumed this was simply how life was was meant to be.
I had lolloped along at an ok pace until
life threw extra stuffs my way and I became immediately overwhelmed.
A wise, wise friend remarked to me:
You need to learn to leave margins.
I needed margins.
That was my AH HA! moment.
That was the phrasing which resonated with me as I already knew I tended to fill spaces.
Literally (we’ve chatted about my clutter problem) and metaphorically (it took an entire counseling masters degree program for me to learn to SIT WITH SILENCE).
MARGINS, as a writer, was phrasing I understood.
It immediately brought to mind how, as a child, Id write stories on unlined paper and have nary a white speck left by the end.
My friend was right.
- I needed to leave virtual margins in my life.
- I needed a SPACE between my load and my life.
- My life demanded a GAP between my load and my breaking point.
My husband had said essentially the same thing years prior, but as with so much in life, I needed wording which clicked with me to FINALLY get it.
And get it I did.
Since we’ve touched down in Oakland Ive committed to looking forward /not obsessively checking my rear view mirror.
Im also committing to living life INSIDE THE LINES (admittedly a bizarre notion for me).
Im drawing margins in Sharpie (just like my boundaries) & building myself a cushion between living and overload.
Im treating my life PRECISELY like I view fitness (what took me so long?!):
Im doing LESS than I am capable of each day so I can greet the *next* 24 hours with joy, excitement, ability and SPACE to do more.
- Am I the last to grasp the notion of life needing margins?
- How do you maintain SPACE or MARGINS in your life?