Last month I surprised the Tornado with a day of YES.
Surprised being the operative word as I kinda surprised myself when the announcement exited my mouth.
The day before had been filled with no’s.
- NO you cant ride your bike in the street—cars are coming!
- NO you cant place the stool on top of the chair to reach a mug—you might fall!
NOs which were mainly about safety—yet nos none the less.
As I watched her come downstairs the next morning I spontaneously decided we BOTH needed a *fun* day.
A YES DAY.
“Yesterday was rough,” I said. “Lets make today a Day of Yes!”
“AWESOME!!!” She shouted and broke into a full-body smile.
“You know what that means?” I asked, surprised, as Id thought Id just created it.
“No!” She answered immediately. (I love kids. They completely vibe off us/our moods. The mere fact *I* was excited about YES! Day filled her with glee.)
I explained to her the rules
whilst simultaneously making them up.
- Everything was a yes! as long as it was safe (May I ride my bike without a helmet? NO!).
- Everything was a yes! as long as I could make it happen (May we see the movie Turbo right now??? No. It’s not showing right now.)
And our day began.
Mama may I watch TV while I eat? (yes)
Mama may we go to the playground right now EARLY? (yes)
It all unfolded like that.
I’m not sure what Id anticipated she’d ask for (a pony? the Barbie Dream Domicile?) but her requests were stuffs it seemed we typically do together anyway.
YES! to opening the ‘graffiti thing’ in the gift-closet which was intended to be a gift.
YES! to barefoot-on-playground (with NO! added where I feared a tetanus-shot).
YES! to RedBox & a big slice of cake after dinner.
In the middle of YES! Day a friend asked if the Tornado wanted to see a movie.
I dont, Mama. I only want to go over to her house and play. Will you ask? (YES!!)
It was in that moment I realized I’d assumed YES! day was solely about fun & gratification. I hadnt anticipated it would serve to remind her of the power of asking for what she wants.
On days other than this one the answer may be no—but if she doesnt *ask* she’s guaranteed not to receive.
It amazed this mama—when given *free* reign—what the Tornado wanted.
Sure she added a smidgen of sugar—but for the most part she simply wanted my time and permission to remove her shoes where she’s normally forced to have covered feet (ahhh 7).
Later that night, as we said our prayers, the Tornado’s was short and simple:
Thank you G-d for my mom did not say no today—she said yes.