Two Guest Post Tuesday: The Famous Leslie & the Infamous Tornado.

by

Hey Miz –

I wrote this for you while stranded in JFK’s Delta Terminal (shout-out to Smoothie World!) I actually typed it out on my handheld, which was probably extremely helpful for my carpal tunnel, bulging disk and various other writing-incurred repetitive stress injuries. But you and the Bumbling Band? So worth it.

PS If you can help me spread the word about my new website name, I’d be SO grateful. The Weighting Game is now going to be found at iVillage’s brand spanking new site, NeverSayDiet.com I’m one of the body image bloggers and I begbegbeg all of your readers who are interested in all things muffin top, airbrushing and bicep curl to bookmark me here. – or if they already read me at Weighting Game, simply switch over the link.

Thanks for letting me guest post! I shall now sit back and wait for the mania that is the MizFit Commenting section commence.

XO,

leslie

Accidental flashing at 24,000 feet

You board your aircraft and you think you’re safe. The air smells appropriately stale, the pilot looks reasonably sober, and there are only minimal milky stains on Seat 14D. Sweet. You get yourself all buckled in and tray tabled-up, the plane goes fly high in the sky…and that’s where the problems begin.

First, if you fall asleep, you risk looking like a moron to anyone who walks by and sees you passed out cold, your mouth big enough to swallow a bacon double cheeseburger whole. Then one of those embarrassing hynogogic jerks jolts through your body, your hand flying up like a bat outta hell and possibly slapping your next door neighbor. Then the waitress airline attendant brings the cart by and offers you those delicious butter cakes known as shortbread cookies, and in two bites, you’ve totally undone your smart airport food court choices (low fat fruit and yogurt parfait; skim latte).

Next, your legs start to ache from being compressed in a seat clearly made for an infant, so you go to stretch. Little do you know, your jeans have stretched out from all that sitting, therefore exposing your entire “Kiss Me, I’m Sweet” thong to the priest sitting behind you. Be careful opening the overhead compartment, as waistbands may have shifted during the flight.

I don’t even want to talk about the sanitary issues happening in a bathroom the size of a coffin, or the neighbor who murmurs to himself as he “reads” his girly magazine, or the two women behind you who have been softly singing hymns from the Bible for the past hour. Once was nice but c’mon, now you’re just making people nervous.

And that nasty, Sahara-dry air? Even a pimply teenage boy’s forehead would turn to sandpaper after two hours. But no way am I schlepping an Evian mister on board. You do know what “Evian” spells backwards, right? “TOO MUCH MONEY FOR WATER.”

Of course, once you land, you’ll likely smack your head against the ceiling as you stand up, or find yourself staring into the armpit of a sweaty fellow passenger reaching for their luggage, or forget your barely-read magazine in the seat pocket. As you deplane, parched for liquids and ready to devour anything with the word “chicken” or “stick” in it due to in-flight meal deprivation, you’ll promise yourself, “Next time, I’m flying first class. I deserve a little champagne and a comfy, clean, hair-free blanket and a seat that reclines more than five degrees.” But you won’t, because that seat costs $5000.

Not that all of this happened to me yesterday on my flight from Chicago to NY or anything.

(I hope that sound I hear is all of you clicking and bookmarking. oh, and returning here for the continuing rambles below.)

Our second guest today is the blog-free wonder known as the Toddler Tornado.

Even though we’ve recently discussed core exercise (& beaten *that* fitness horse to death) I requested she demonstrate for the Bumbling Band the exercise we do together to strengthen our core.

Please to enjoy and please to note the outfit.

It’s a mismatched hodgepodge hastily thrown together when Texas plunged into frigid (read: 50 degree) temps.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFzT-RxzDV4

(and no, Im not kidding. if she were able to balance the camera then *I* would have demo’d merely so you could hear her scream GO MOMMY! GO!! when my belly thwacks the swing as I land.)

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Comments

  1. Mmmmm… no matter how fun it looks, and I am always one for fun, I think I will stick to assorted planks, crunches an Swiss ball exercises. Of course, not having a toddler of my own, I would be hard pressed to figure out where ther are swings in my living area.

    As for Leslie’s remarks on flying? I can relate to basically every single item. I can only hammer in my water bottle trick again: bring an empty bottle through security, fill it in a restroom on the other side. Now I am absolutely dreading my next flight which is on Sunday.

  2. HILARIOUS POST! I can totally relate!! ahh, flying is a nightmare and seeming as how all my flights these days seems to be 9+ hrs long, you can only imagine how parched/frazzled/sandpaper-y I am on the other side!!

    Toddler Tornado is ad-or-able! I’ll get my husband to try that one out first 😉

  4. Indeed first class is not just a better seat. It’s a better life. Okay, off to add the new blog to my RSS feed 🙂

    The Tornado and I must be soul mates too. Dig the camo poncho! I used to do that swing thing all the time in my Garanimals when I was a kiddo. That’s how mom made sure we matched. Even had a few resulting face plants. Need to go try that with the triplets 😀

  5. yes the flying story makes me less fear the onslaught of family this week as at least Im not flying to get them (see tomorrow’s post for my plans :))

    and Stephanie? you crazy. and you must get the triplets doing that on film! we’ll send it to joel mchale at the soup!

  6. hahahhaha she is so freaking cute! I wish I could swing on a swing like that allll day! Love the guest post- laughed through the whole thing.

  7. That child is wonderful. The Boy and I shall tighten our cores in similar fashion this afternoon in tribute 🙂

    Great video!
    Shelley

  9. FGF? the Tornado entirely agrees.

    especially with regards to Sour Patch Kids and chocolate.

    she hath been known to r-e-a-l-l-y strain (yes I said it) to do her bidness on the potty to gain access to the aforementioned bellyfilling treats.

  11. I enjoyed the post (both posts. funny video!) but do not like that the site is called neversaydiet.

    are they trying to get people who are looking for diet tips to come there by the name?

    it feels exploiting to me for some reason.

    was it for google hits?

  14. and a special prize to the first person to go to the park/playground, videotape their core experience, upload to youtube and send it my way.

    for reals.

  15. I haven’t flown in years. Just this morning there was a thing on the news about $3 water and $15 per suitcase. Yikes!

    I don’t think I FIT in a swing!! LOL

    Leslie’s blog goes to page not found! 🙁 But ew to the model with no belly button. LOL.

  16. Looks like lots of good information on NeverSayDiet.com. I like the workouts section – good to take a look through and see things you haven’t done for awhile. Like medicine ball plank hold. Hhhhmmm, guess I should add those in again…
    My kids used to always do that on the swing, now they do other things that always make me think we will be heading to the E.R.!

  17. HUH. I thought I doubletriple checked the linkage.

    Will fix when I’m at computer.

    And check out the navelfree model.

    And lori? There are other more ER-inducing things? 😉

  18. I checked out Never Say Diet last night like a diligent little Leslie-ette! It looks great, I’m really looking forward to reading more.

    I always fall for the shortbread biscuit routine. They just smile so NICELY it feels rude to say no…

    (am SO doing the swing thing. and videoing it. and sending it. looks like MY kind of core workout)

    TA x

  19. I know that flight. I’ve been there too, (although not with the thong showing) where you also have that flat a__ syndrome. This is where those wonderful padded seats turn you posterior into a packed position that you can now iron shirts on. Then there’s the get to know social gathering at the luggage carousal where everyone goes out of their way to make you feel welcome at you new destination.

  20. I fly to San Diego twice a year, and I’ve never had any of those horrible/amusing things happen to me that other people always seem to experience. The worst I’ve ever had to deal with is an extremely talkative six year old who wanted to tell me about every movie he’d ever seen in his life.

    I do have the one good story about when the plane was late and I had to make a mad dash for the bus stop across two terminals while wearing my Superman-logo t-shirt.

  23. and annette? perhaps the tornado CAN film I just won’t let her since I do my (fingerquotes) core work (unFQ) whilst wearing a helmet.

    Amen natalia.
    And I ‘fixed it’ last night too….

    Zipping home to fix.

  24. got husband to do it 🙂

    does leslies NAME now go to her new site?

    if not, it gonna be a while…SORRY.

    Miz

  25. Fortunately, my thong has never been exposed during a flight. However I regularly pas out with my head against the window and drool! Which is odd, because I don’t drool at home :-/

    The SoG

  26. ahh flying.

    dreading the flying….except through the air like the Tornado.

    I shall try that after thanksgiving dinner to burn calories. not.

  27. My travel experiences haven’t been that bad.

    Although BK once was reading a book on a plane, and the narrator started talking about people joining the mile high club, which made him giggle.

  31. Some day I will learn how to add all of these fabulous links to my blog. Another great one in Leslie.
    Toddler (superstar) always entertaining, and far too cute!

  34. Funny story Leslie, and my bookmark has already been changed. 😉

    TT is too cute. I would have loved to see video of you doing it while she screams, “go mommy!” I love how kids get all excited like that. I don’t think I will try that particular core move. It looks like it may make me want to puke.

  36. i think if you doubleclick on the video it opens in youtube.

    i agree about the bad airplane experiences. certain airports/airlines are worse than others…

  37. THANKS S (what would I do without you and yer info?).

    Although can you see where to click, Sagan?

    Ill be back to link in a bit….

    (My vids are in youtube under chickenbus2006)

  38. Love, love, love the video.

    And I can so relate the airplane story. I love to travel but really don’t enjoy plane rides. BTW – didn’t get the MizFit link in my inbox today…but I remembered anyway. Happy Turkey Day (Week)

  39. Ooh ooh I found it! (So exciting for computer illiterate little me:)).

    Swings are so much fun. That’s my kind of exercise!

  40. debra? I’m not sure why that’s happening.

    **Anyone have any insight for me?**

    On a DIFFERENT note I finally saw the Richard Simmons commercial everyone kept refering to after my grocery store workout.
    Too funny.

  41. I think I was on Leslie’s flight Thursday night.

    Love the flying tornado exercise. Especially how it looks like she’s totally going to go a little wide… but then she somehow pulls it off and doesn’t land on her face. Good stuff. 🙂

  42. You can always get sick, puke on yourself and get upgraded to business class on a European flight. Have a massive German lady standing over you to give you water and a shot in the butt in the galley…Lovely. This really did happen to me.

    As for the swing- all kids are great at that, arent’ they? I’ll stick to a plank for myself because I would look like a fool doing that!

  45. I can relate to the airplane ride! I love flying, but hate the cramped seats and all the people packed around me. The worst was the guy directly in front of me who snored incredibly loudly for the duration of a 4 hour flight.

    Love the tornado! So cute!

  46. Love it! Flew for the first time ever last month. Substitute granny panties for thong and you’ve got my experience in a nutshell.

    Love the tornado footage. Somehow, when we’re kids, we just make exercise fun instinctively!

  47. My best workouts are always when I’m babysitting toddlers!! Its cardio, weights, stretching…all in one! Thanks for the great posts!

  48. *sigh*
    I cant lie to you, People.

    I am STRUGGLING.

    if you have a vision board please to slap up a picture of Miz and affix next to it some kind of workSOMETHING.

    an agent calling me.
    getting a sitesponsor.
    another writing gig.
    ANYTHING.

    I love my labor of love (uh, this :)) but need more labors to pay the bills.

    thank you.

  51. haha, 50* outside? Goodness, if it were that warm here you’d find me decked out in a t-shirt, shorts and flip flops. But I’m the person who wore flip flops last night for a 10 min walk in 25* weather.

    but anyways, you do know that an eclectic style is coming back into fashion (to my knowledge…) especially when it gets cold and you put on all of the layers you can fit on your body while still being able to move.

  52. May I suggest a massive vision board with all kinds of wonderful people and wonderful work offers? (me, too, please?)

    Reading Leslie’s flight post makes me glad I’m not flying too soon. But I so want to join the Tornado is flying on a swing! Dare I tape it?

  53. fun post!
    my boys LOVE that core exercise…think i migh hurt myself if i tried to join in!
    i do usually use the playground time to get me some squats, lunges, tri-dips and push-ups in….even though i feel a little silly and sometimes even feel like i’m being glared at by the “what are you trying to prove’ stares from the other mamas!!

  54. I hate to fly and am always sensing omens of disaster with every bump, noise or flight atttendants stressed look. So the hymn thing would have TOTALLY freaked me out.

    And the Tornado rocks! Great “guest” workout video!

  55. Miz? not that I don’t believe in the vision board but maybe we should do something a bit more proactive?

    love the guest post.

    love leslie!

  56. I was on Leslie’s flight too. I’m the one with the mouth open wide enough to fit a bacon cheeseburger. Why does that only seem to happen 35,000 feet in the air? I don’t sleep like that at home! The post was funny. I checkedout neversaydiet.com – great site.

    Lil Tornado is a cutie. Love the purple pants and running plop on the seat. I’m not sure I’d fit on a swing these days, but I remember doing this when I was younger.

  59. Funny post! Hate the wide (drooly) mouth sleep that only seems to occur on public transport. Why is that?
    The hymn singing? Would push me right over the edge. It’s up there with humming as the most Annoying Thing Ever.

    Cute Tornado!! Exactly how i use the swing!

  61. Love the Tornado video. She is so cute from the back! I wish I could strengthen my own core the same way. I’m with tisha on that ‘not sure I could fit on a swing these days’ statement. At least not face first!

  62. Thank you Mizfit for stopping in to ask me about my goals. I needed that kick in the rear!

    I also love this posts, I’ve added them to my list of blogs to perv on!

    Many thanks
    Tamzin

  63. don’t know if you remember me but we actually met at the park!

    tracked down your webste and couldn’t believe this was the post I found.

    funny. funny.

  64. don’t know if you remember me but we actually met at the park!

    of course I do! now dont give away all my secrets. you know, since you saw the coreworkout first hand and all….

  65. I hate flying. Once I got trapped in a window seat next to a blind evangelical (and his guide dog) intent on converting me. The flight attendant couldn’t bring the drinks fast enough.

  66. LOVE the tornado – that was hilarious! I miss the swings . . . there isn’t a park around my house that I know of . . . 🙁

    But Miz, I think I’d pay money to see you doing “core work” in your helmet! Maybe that should be your new endeavor: a new blog that we have to pay a monthly subscription for, where you and the Tornado try out all manner of wacky fitness exercises! I’m just sayin . . . 😉

  67. Leslie,

    Great writing! You’ve really got the gift there, I will definitely come check out your site.

    And Miz, your little Tornado is absolutely adorable! I used to be a little Tazmanian Devil when I was that age… miss those days.

    Thanks for the post!

    All the Best,

    Andrew R

  69. But Miz, I think I’d pay money to see you doing “core work” in your helmet! Maybe that should be your new endeavor: a new blog that we have to pay a monthly subscription for, where you and the Tornado try out all manner of wacky fitness exercises! I’m just sayin . . .

    you are so kind to say that, marste, and youd not be the first (the suggesting of charging part —to clarify—you are the first to say she’d pay :))

    Im just not about having a pay site for some reason (cue music alluding to the fact Im destined to die a pauper. whatevs).

    Im all about the free.

    and the do whatcha love and the money will follow.

    yes?

    YES?

    OPRAH YOU LISTENIN??

    Miz.

  70. Miz–just came over to wish you a very happy Thanksgiving (love the take-out BBQ you’re planning!)

    I am very thankful for the kindness you show to so very many people every day.


  71. woman? oh debby? you hath no friggin idea how much I needed this today and how close I was to tossing in the MizFit sweatsplattered towel out of povertyexhaustion.

    I am very thankful for the kindness you show to so very many people every day.

    thank you thank you thank you (and dont think youre getting off from reading tomorrows post. we’re getting all kinds of Fight the Familial DysFUNction up in herre!).

  72. Oh, airplanes, you make me feel less than human. If I’m lucky enough to be able to drift off to sleep, I’ll take it– who cares if I’m snoring/drooling/jerking around.

    Go Tornado Go on the swing!

    Speaking of TT, one of the sad parts of my own childhood was watching my mom do work that made her miserable and tired to try to support us. Maybe being destitute would have been worse (certainly it would have, thanks mom!) but (a) I don’t think those are the only 2 options and (b) you are a great role model for the little one AND for me…I’m cultivating courage to go after what I love instead of what I’m comfortable with…

  73. just stopping by in case I’m too rushed tomorrow (although now that i see you will have a thanksgiving family dysfunction post I may have to make time) to say thank you for all you do!

    have a great turkey day!!

  75. Thanks, eevryone, for all of your shout-outs and support! So THIS is what it feels like to get 70=plus comments in a day?! Awesome.
    TA – “diligent little Leslie-ette” – too funny.

  76. I think I’m going to have to make an appointment with the park, even if I don’t have kids yet. All the moms can stare at me like I’m crazy, I just might be anyway.

  79. The swings await!! Your TT is way ahead of the game, all the Kindergarteners do the same: launch themselves onto the swings, belly first. Makes my stomach hurt just watching them.

    I may just post my core move on YouTube for you, but I certainly won’t be the first to post. I’m just not that tech savvy — I’ll need help from the hubby.

    Have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday in Austin. :>)

  80. oh you not getting off that easy, Conny.

    If you do a video email me.

    I’ll help you figure out the upload 😉

  81. No wonder my daughter has abs of steel; she loves that move!

    Every time I hear (read) do what you love and the money will follow, I think, “damn, can money be any SLOWER?”

  82. dude, swinging in general can work your core. brandon and i act like we’re 5 rather than 25 a lot and play on playgrounds when we get the chance. it’s awesome.

    as for leslie … LOVE IT. too true. but first class? only if it’s international first. or business. *drooooool*

  83. What a great post all around! The plane trip scenario had me in stitches 🙂

    And toddler tornado is such a brave girl! She totally throws herself into the swing. Babisodes on the other hand….the wind blowing an empty set beside her would be swinging higher.

  84. I’m a frequent flyer for work, so I have been through all of Leslie’s challenges and then some. My answer to it all was the Burton Sleeper Hoodie, which makes my world (high in the sky) a better place. Also, I dont try to eat healthy on “flying days” I’m all about the Swedish Berries all the time.

    I read a book while on the swing a month ago. It was a good 15min break.

  85. I hear ya. I keep waiting for people to throw money at me when I’m working-out, but gosh-darn it just hasn’t happened yet.

    Money isn’t everything; but it sure rises in importance when you don’t have it.

  87. Geeez, can’t wait to board our 3 hour flight tomorrow… it’s all true, but there’s a worse version of it when you travel with three small children! And speaking of, how adorable is Tornado? I do love swinging.

  88. kara? traveling with three kids? THAT might be the video I need to see.

    travel safely….and calmly 🙂

  89. Like so many others, I HATE travelling. But I’m
    2000 miles away from my wonderful family,
    300 miles away from my partner’s family,
    and take 2-3 trips a year for work…
    so travel happens.

    Anyone got tips for making flying less of a dehumanizing experience?

  90. Oh, this post made my month! Flying IS so degrading!
    And I’m so glad I have kids: it means I get to play on the playground without getting arrested.
    (The Tornado is adorable, BTW!)

  91. Wow, Love the name of the new website- it’s great to have a focus on healthy body image and a turn from ‘diet’ to healthy and happy lifestyle!

  92. OH. MY. GOSH. Miz! The idea of a post about ‘fight the family disFUNction.’ I need it so very badly. If only I can make it to a computer. (Because, of course, I can’t use my dad’s wife’s computer, she doesn’t trust me with it. And that is only the tiniest tip of the family disfunction going on around in here, as you say.)

    Hey, Miz, I have a kernel of an idea for ‘work’ that pays for you. It’s been on my mind for a bit. But I am running late for the ‘FUN’ so if I don’t email you when I get home, PLEASE remind me.

  94. YES. thank you for the emails or I wouldnt have known that the site was down this afternoon for a while…and has been sporadically recently.

    Im working on it…

    if by *I* you mean Im begging peeps for help—-which I do 🙂

  95. I just checked out BodyImage and loved it.

    Especially the part about the VS model who’s getting bad publicity for being a little healthy, or at least not anorexic. If VS is opening with her their either trying to follow Europe’s trends (who’s changed their BMI # for their models), or their doing a little reverse psychology…“is this what you really want to see public.“

    A little more muscle couldn’t hurt. But, who knows what’s real. Photoshop can fix just about anything. So how many women out there are aspiring to be like a digital image that doesn’t even exist.

    For me…it’s time to get real, and maybe go swing with the kids =)

  96. Fantastic guest post…and Exhibits A through E as to why I don’t fly very much. Okay, ever.

    Is it my imagination or has the Tornado had a growth spurt recently? She looks so much bigger than when I last saw her.

  98. Double our pleasure!!

    It’s two, two, two great posts in one!

    Even with all the horror stories, I really wish I could fly somewhere. Sad, I know. I have major cabin fever, and it’s not even bad weather here (yet).

    The TT is oh-so-cute, and I love the camo. However, I am more into imagining you and Mike Myers playing together on the playground in your helmets. ROFL!

  99. My, flying is a treat isn’t it? Loved the post. And the tornado is cute. My boys and I also have funky ways to strengthen our cores… Also, Utah is a great place for cross country skiing…

  100. cttytyqiamfugofiwell, hi admin adn people nice forum indeed. how’s life? hope it’s introduce branch 😉

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