Jyze: wind up fit!

by

It is with a heavy heart Im here to announce I hath failed you.

This post was supposed to be a Tuesday Testdrive (review) and, instead, Im here to wave the white flag o’surrender.

(cue mournful music)

The culprit?

The product I wholly & utterly adored the promise of?

The Jyze.

(I’ll wait while you click on the link.  You simply must.)

People, I had visions of my Jyzing all around town.

Jyzing as I chased the toddler about the yard.

Jyzing as I wandered the aisles in my local grocery.

Jyzing as I did my morning interval training on the recumbent bike.

Jyze. Jyze. Jyze.

Alas, it was not to be.

Yes, I can admit I was partially attracted to the silliness factor (fits perfect into my philosophy of PLAYouts) yet more than that I loved multitasking opportunity the Jyze offered.

The concept of burning more calories through the addition of an upper body component to my cardio? WHAT’S NOT TO LOVE?

ahhhh.

What’s not to love.

For me it was the Jyze.

*sigh*

To know me is to know how I hate to give a negative review.

This isnt a negative review, however, to the extent this MizFit never Jyzed an inch.

Now, the Jyze is *thoughtfully* sent to consumers prewound so I must emphasize that, were you not proud Mama to a Toddler Tornado who ‘helped’ & UNwound the device for you, you may quickly & easily have gotten to Jyzing.

Me? Not so much.

After the Tornado unwound the device, I grabbed the explanatory insert & commenced what I thought would be a quick rewind.

And I struggled.

And I twistedturnedlooped&tugged.

I grabbed my laptop & clickclicked over to the Jyze site where they explain three different methods to rewind the product.

Method one? FAIL. (interspersed with shouts of COME ON JYZE! Dont fail me now! You’re up on Tuesday!)

Method two? FRICK! This thing is killing me! Didnt work.

Method three: CRAP! Couldn’t quite master it either.

And believe me, Im not conveying well, either, how silly slap happy I became toward the end of attempt number three.

In all honesty, I received a pretty damn good core workout whilst laughing at myself & my lack of Jyze winding skillz.

Was I frustrated? Yes, but mainly because I’d be so eagerly anticipating hitting the streets of my ‘hood, Jyzing to my hearts content & seeing what the neighbors had to say.

Would they laugh? Would they long to join in? Would I grow fatigued? Would I be able to carry on a conversation wilst Jyzing?

All these questions were forced to remain unanswered.

Being the patient woman I am I called my husband at the office & pestered him until he came home waited until the Ren Man was free and sought his help.

Suffice it to say he didnt appreciate the fact I almost wet my pants laughing at his Jyze’ttempts.

He, too, read the insert, watched the video & then constructed his own method of winding involving his chin & some tape.

No (it didnt work) no (I didnt get it on film. I tried, believe me.) and NO (DICE with the winding).

Much to my chagrin, I was still 100% Jyze-free.

Now, in defense of the company their customer service is amazing.

When I emailed saying I was having trouble figuring out how to wind the device mere moments after hitting send I received an email  response.

The individual gave me two other suggested tactics (didnt work for me) & an offer to call if I still couldn’t wind the Jyze.

I didnt call.

I havent talked to some family members in months it’s so freakin’ hard to make a call with the Tornado underfoot.

So that’s really it, people.

I give you the Tuesday Testdrive that never was (&, perhaps, the Jyze if you make a really good case and will  pay for shipping.).

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11M-MboJz2E

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Comments

  3. Okay, that comment of mine got really messed up! Before I hit post, a delivery arrived at the door. I suspect my own toddler tornadoes had something to do with my previous comment being posted (and messed up) before I got back to my computer.

  5. We need to get someone to help you with that because I want to see you Jyzing around your neighborhood.

    That would be a video!! LOL

  6. You are too nice Miz.
    Complimenting their service on an item you couldn’t get to work 🙂

    I’ve seen this around on the internet and no one has gotten it started without troubles.

  7. Aw Miz. Well at least you got a core workout. In my house the Jyze would have become a flying object as I flung it across the room. There probably would have been some cussing invovled! 🙂

  8. I think this has to be one of my favorite product reviews of all time!

    You tried so HARD to be nice to it! You gave it every chance in the world. C’mon little Jyze, you can do it!

    Being a lazy-assed product reviewer, I can’t imagine spending that much time trying to get a product to work.

    And the video ending was perfect, you made me laugh out loud.

  9. I would think at this point you’d get as much out of it as passsing a slinky from hand to hand.

    Is it possible that the entire exercise is trying to rewind this device?

  10. I want to try the Jyze.
    Would you really send to me if I paid shipping?

    Love this post and adore your honsety, MizFit

  11. hahaha- well at least you got a workout trying to get it to work?? What a bummer. Hope today goes well 😉

  13. How can a review be not a review yet provide a review?

    Your example is spot on.

    Mine would have become a projectile, and my boy’s vocabulary would have been expanded by several expletives not even invented yet.

  14. The Jyze looks like a toy that I used to love from my childhood – no wonder you were so excited to try it…a TOY that you can workout with?!? Awesome!

    Your video? Made me chuckle. I “unwound” a salad spinner once and it pretty much looked like that trying to get it to work!

  15. I could imagine how funny it was trying to get it work! Too bad it’s stuck cause I’d like to hear what you think. I think it looks silly, but who knows!

  18. & I seriously had no idea how much I disliked waving that white bandanna of surrender.

    The Jyze is still on the table & I’m still periodically messing w/it 😉

  19. I’m a little behind so THANKS for the sets and repetitions video.
    I was one of the people who emailed you asking for clarification.

    No Jyze for me.

  22. OMG – this post cracked me up!

    The jyze people should send you another one just because you were so nice in your review (and you can send that one to me – I’ll fix it and send it back! Or burn it for you, whichever….)

    Loved the video.

  24. Seems to me that have a very good marketing team behind them and are selling a false promise.

    Just too bad. One clue that it’s not such a ‘great’ product: ALL of their testimonials only give first name & last initial. No last time, no website, not photo — nada.

    Just saying…

  25. I echo most of the other comments. Kudos to you for persistence. Frustration and I don’t make a good team. Your video was the perfect expression of patience sorely tried in a very patient person.

  26. oooh Dinneen I love that!

    My new MIZ goal is to BE THE PROMISE w/out a marketing team.

    Much better that way!

  28. An exercise in futility.

    (loved the video)

    But if you are the exercise queen and can’t get this contraption to function, how would a ‘normal’ person use it?

  29. Bwah ha ha ha! You could probably hit the ol’ Home Depot and string together a couple of bungee cords for the same workout effect! Sorry it didn’t work, but it made for a great story!

    You need to look into the TRX suspension trainer (http://budurl.com/m2xd) you would LOVE it!

  30. How much do I love that you called Ren Man at the office?

    Thanks for showing you are human as I always think of you as superwoman 🙂

  31. You need to look into the TRX suspension trainer (http://budurl.com/m2xd) you would LOVE it!

    YOU KNOW I SO WANT ONE OF THOSE.

    Need a few more writing gigs to come my way (hello Law of Attraction!) to afford!

  32. Oh no! I remember your excitement over this! And if anyone could have worked that thing in style, it would have been you! Although I have to say I’m leery of a product that can be undone by a toddler but can’t be fixed by two intelligent adults. Methinks they need to work on that.

  35. “Jyze can help make walking even more effective”: okay, this walkerhealthgirl NEEDS the Jyze! Sounds like my cup of tea.

    Until then, I’ll have to get in my exercising by dodging the tuk tuks and motos that threaten to run me down. Phnom Penh isn’t overly walker-friendly (I’m on a mission to change that ;)).

    PS You make me giggle!

  36. When I was a kid, we used to make a smaller version with thread/string and a button or a cardboard circle.

    To wind it, we’d hold one end of the string loop in each hand and whirl the button around and around until the string was wound.

    Sorry the jyze didn’t work for you!

    • and nita you KNOW that was one of the tactics I tried. May try again. Today. And film. COMEDY. GOLD.
      (if you can tune out the swearing)

      waves excitedly at Fitarella!!

  39. Maybe you should give it back to the Tornado and she could accidentally fix it for you? Stranger things have happened!!

  40. hahaha! I secretly wish you could’ve gotten it to work because it seems like a silly device that I would’ve loved to use as well!

    But alas I won’t spend my money on it if you couldn’t get it to work.

    The sad little video is priceless. 🙂

  43. You even manage to make a frustrating experience hilarious. Thanks for all your efforts Miz! Has anyone noted that Miz rhymes with Jyze?

  44. ok… I have to laugh a little at this.

    Don’t you remember having a toy like this as a kid? I had one. Next thing you know they’ll be marketing “fitness hoop” LOL

  47. Your toddler has done quite a service to the gadget buying public. Just think of how many countless dollars she may have saved people!

  48. The last thing I need is another challenge. Thank you for saving me the aggravation. Not convinced I could have walked and done this at the same time anyway!

  52. Please get this working Miz.
    Did you see those people on the videos?
    I must see you Jyzing.

    Jyzeing?

  56. What a disappointment! It looked like it could have been so much fun.

    I thought the same thing, what would the neighbors think? Would they want one too, would they be jealous about all the fun I was having!

    I hate when things don’t work out when you are so excited about them..

  57. Miz, do you not feel incredible about yourself? Who else could get 56 comments about a non-review? We all love you, and love hearing from you no matter what.

    The bungee strap suggestion intrigues me. I think I’d be afraid of getting hit with one of the hook ends.

    Oh well, my hands are full with the three doggies on my walks. Maybe if I allowed them to pull on their leads I’d get a better upper body workout?

  58. Have you heard back from the company?

    I love that we can rely on your honesty, Miz.

    One of the reasons I come here.

    The other? Your arms 😉

  59. Hmmm…products that annoying are a negative review in themselves. Glad to hear that they at least have good customer service.

  61. I had seen this product but never had the desire to try it. After reading your post, I “almost” wished it had worked, not only for me to try BUT for you!!! You wanted it to work so badly!

    Me, I just love my weights too much so I guess this did not entice me enough! Can they put weights on that thing!! HA!

  62. OOOH Jody. Actually there is a way to vary the tension through different level bands (as with dynabands) I just never made it that far 🙂

    and in reference to the comment above about getting hurt etc. there is a big big BE CAREFUL NOT TO GET YOUR HAIR CAUGHT IN THE JYZE note in the instructions.

    or
    in my case
    the DESTRUCTIONS .

  64. I am laughing laughing at your post and the comments. Getting past the point of grrrrrr-argggh frustration to hysterical laughter frustration is always a breakthrough. And I love the Ren Man method of trying to do it. My own guy always carefully reads the instructions, then looks at me, shakes his head, and proceeds to show me his “better way.” Frequently this works– I’m sorry chin + tape didn’t do it.

    P.S. Do you know how to juggle?

  65. It looks like it has potential! Oh well 😛 It reminds me of a kiddie toy though. I feel like I had one of these when I was little, ‘cept it was probably less expensive and they didn’t tell you it burned calories.

  66. Sayyyyy…..I think I had one of those toys in elementary school. Betcha you might find a replacement in a thrift store.

    And how do you pronounce it? I try to say it but it doesn’t come right. Is it like jive, but with a z? See, that’s not natural.

  68. HI-larious. I was thinking when I clicked the first link, wow, this is probably something I could do on the treadmill. Now…not so much.

    I am so far behind on your blog it’s not funny. Been swamped!! But I see you’re going strong.

  69. P.S. Do you know how to juggle?

    oooh Im intrigued as I just wrote a post about the jugglin’

    (answer? not well :))

  73. I don’t know what’s more hilarious, your struggles with the Jyze or the contraption itself!! I think I may have laughed equally at both your video and the one on the Jyze website 😛

  75. All I can see looking at how this thing works is how easily I could hurt myself with it…I don’t think it is for me 🙂

  76. Who came up with that name?? The demo vid on the site made me giggle. I can only imagine how great it would have been to have you Jyzeing (or Jyzing) around the grocery store.

    Also, this is possibly the nicest negative review ever.

  77. Loved this post. You’re hilarious! And seriously, I’m glad some other people commented on the name, glad to know I’m not the only one with my mind in the gutter….

  78. Hi Carla,

    Let me assure you, you are not alone! For some people (about 10-20% of humans), Jyze can be hard to use the first time. But, after a 2-3 minute maximum learning curve, and sometimes with a little coaching, I have not found one person that couldn’t use Jyze successfully.

    It’s like riding a bike your first time. Who got it with no help? And who can forget how once you’ve conquered the idea of pedals spinning and looking a few feet ahead rather than straight down at the ground. I promise, Jyze is much simpler but takes a teeny sense of rhythm.

    Hi, I invented Jyze. Well, just this version. The concept of a spinning disc on a string has been around for at least a century. Ask anyone over 70 if they’ve ever seen something like Jyze and they’ll tell you about finding the largest button in grandma’s jar of buttons, hooking a loop of string through two of its holes, and winding it up. Pull, relax, pull again. Not a big deal, right? My point? If generations of our ancestors could figure this out, keep after it for a few minutes longer and you’re sure to break through.

    So, let me try to walk you through this process of winding Jyze so that you can realize the much-promised benefits of winding up fit on your next walk.

    First, let me warn you of the most common beginner’s mistake: PULLING THE HANDLES WIDE APART AND WAITING FOR SOMETHING TO HAPPEN IS A WASTE OF TIME. It’s sort of like sitting on a bike and hoping it will take you someone. C’mon!

    Here goes:

    1) Unwind the Jyze disc and rope completely.
    2) Lay Jyze out on a table with the handles apart.
    3) Pick the disc up a bit and wind it 20 or so times IN THE SAME DIRECTION.
    4) Rest the disc on the table and read the next point before doing anything else.

    READ THIS IMPORTANT CONCEPT BEFORE YOU DO ANYTHING ELSE. Jyze only works when you do the work. It doesn’t exercise you. You exercise you! Remember, sitting on a bike won’t get you anywhere. You have to pedal. Remember pedaling a bike too hard and having your foot slip off the pedal forward as you came around the turn?

    Here’s the most important Jyze concept in more detail. When you start pulling, you’ll tug both hands wide apart and then let off by moving your hands a little closer together (by six inches or so) and WATCH THE DISC WIND THE ROPE BACK UP. As the disc slows, you’ll tug again, winding it in the opposite direction. If you only pull and then wait for something to happen for you, you’re out of your ever-loving mind. Stay with it for a few minutes and you’ll find the rhythm that makes using Jyze so powerful.

    Ready?

    5) Pick up a handle with each hand, leaving the Jyze disc resting against the table. (If you picked up the disc and it came unwound, start over with Step #1.)
    6) Tug the rope by pulling the handles away from each other. Don’t jerk it, yank it, but simply tug it smoothly. This should spin the disc with a smooth action.
    7) Immediately let off a bit (handles a closer together by six inches or so). Don’t slap your hands together. Just simply let off a bit.
    8) Watch the disc as it twists the rope back up. As it slows, tug again. Don’t wait for the disc to come to a complete stop before you tug again. Don’t watch it unwind in the opposite direction. You actually have to participate in this part!
    9) Repeat. As you get the basic action down, winding faster and pulling harder will come automatically.

    Now, if you’d asked me to teach you to ride a bike via blog, I think I would fail. But if you’ll believe that frontier children played with a button on a string long before you or I were born and island children today still play with something similar (I have no idea what it’s called), and you’re willing to try again, then you have a chance of being successful with Jyze.

    A personal confession? I struggled at first to get the darn toy that gave me this idea to stay wound. But why quit because you struggled a bit! Who of us gave up learning to ride a bike when the promise of fun trips down the sidewalk was so close? You can do this!

    Wind up fit!

    Brett Walker
    President/Owner
    JyzeFit

    P.S. I’m still willing to take that call (even make one!) if you’re not successful after this attempt to explain things.

  79. I feel just like you Carla.. I was SO EXCITED when I saw the ad for this JyzePro.. However when I received it, it was unwound, and first thing I did was log onto their site, reviewed the video’s, made a tons of attempts to wind it and get it to work, then got fed up and put it back in the bag. When my husband came home I had him try as well, same thing.

    I then noticed my bank statement showing a toll free number, and when I called the lady on the other end seemed like she was answering a residential line and proceeded to tell me they’re the one’s who actually shot the commercial for this product and are not affiliated with the product in itself. She gave me a toll free number and I called and spoke with a nice girl who apologized for the inconvenience and said would overnight a new one to me, along with return packaging for the nonworking one. That call took place mid January, it’s March and still nothing. I called my bank and canceled payment and sent this one back. Now i’m out postage, and alot of time!

  81. Llegué a tu blog y me gustó mucho el contenido que publicas. Me la pasé leyendo un rato largo. Agregaré la dirección a mi lector de noticias. ¿Tienes tiempo?, visita mi blog. Saludos!

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  2. […] Subtitle: Please, if you have not yet, take a moment and ready the first Jyze post. The Tuesday Testdrive which never transpired. […]

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