Hello! My name is Kammie and I am the blogger behind Sensual Appeal – where everything is delicious, mindful, and happy. I’m honored to have the opportunity to share my story today with you. Big shot out to Carla – you’re awesome!
Today, I wanted to share my story from last year that had the biggest impact on my life thus far. It created a huge shift in my perspective and outlook on life.
You see – I’ve been a chronic dieter for many years. I restricted and exercised obsessively followed by periods of binging and feeling sorry for myself. The weight went up and down like a roller coaster: it was rapid, it was overwhelming, it was discouraging.
For years, I’ve let my diet struggles define me. For years, I’ve internalized the failed diets I went on, thinking they were always my fault – that I wasn’t strong or motivated enough. I called myself a lazy failure and gave up. A week or two later, however, I’d be at it again – motivated again with the vicious cycle starting once again.
This went on for years until my psyche was torn down and exhausted. I was sick and tired of the incessant pain I was causing myself. Despite all the things I kept telling myself about my good intentions, I was still ridden by guilt, shame, and desperation.
Then, a shift happened. I gave up.
I stumbled upon a book that changed my view on dieting forever. Upon learning about Intuitive Eating, it made so much sense to me – I knew there was no way in hell would I ever be happy with the way I was treating my body and my mind at the time. If this went on, I would only get worse and worse- my mind, body, and spirit would continue getting a beating and the recovery time would get shorter and shorter.
I couldn’t bear another diet. I couldn’t bare more shame.
I embraced the IE practice and let it take over my life. This shift happened in March 2013. The process has taken many months and it is still in the process of finishing its course but it has made a profound impact on my being.
I went from chronic dieting to accepting myself for who I am and how I look like, regardless of my weight and cravings.
I started focusing on self-love rather than shame and guilt.
I started learning what foods I actually like and dislike – being more mindful while eating and throwing away the notion of “good” and “bad” foods, thus starting to truly live a balanced life.
I focused on being happy and joyful.
The change was a huge one and I couldn’t be happier for having made it.
While I am no longer the size I was when I was in the midst of my disordered eating patterns, I also longer feel as miserable as I did then. While I had my good days and proud days because of the way I looked – I now can smile at myself in the mirror regardless. I have the courage to ask for help when I need it. I have taken the time to really get to know ME. Who I am deep inside and I’ve started to work on personal development that is deeper than an issue of dieting or weight loss.
I’ve begun to learn about myself so that I can continue to grow in the many years to come.
And my story is till being written.
Thank you again to Carla for the awesome job with the blog.
I hope this post inspired you to reflect on your own situation and realize that regardless of how crappy you might sometimes feel, there are better days ahead – no matter what. 🙂
If you liked what I said, I’d love for you to check out my blog at Sensual Appeal Blog.