This post is not sponsored.
It’s an outgrowth of a Facebook status which prompted a flurry of questions about the procurement of our Squatty Potty.
We potty purchased ourselves.
There are no affiliate links below.
La Di Da Di, we like to SQUATTY.
We don’t cause trouble we don’t bother nobody.
We’re just two girls who’re…on the pot.
When we need to poop you KNOW how we SQUAT.
Once upon a time there was a Queen and a Princess.
They both ate a LOT of fiber rich super foods
And yet? Our Princess still struggled on the royal…throne.
(We wont even talk about the Queen. Her love of hemp hearts et al made her highly regular)
(insert NSFW image here of said Princess upon “throne.”)
The Queen oft considered procuring a Squatty Potty.
She assumed, however, her Princess would royally refuse to recline upon it.
Our Queen presumed incorrectly and, once she ordered (ecco 7″),
the two lovelies were hard-pressed to decide who was more excited for Squatty’s arrival.
Upon unboxing our Queen was shocked by Squatty’s simplicity.
And yet, while her royal court might have been right
and she *may* have been able to create a Squatty on her own,
she knew the Princess would be exceedingly excited by the snazzy contraption.
Our Queen plopped the Squatty in its place of honor
then showed the Princess precisely what to do
(chants of KINKED COLON, OPEN COLON! could be heard throughout the land)
And she departed the royal lav. planning never to utter the word Squatty again.
Oh my how our Queen was mistaken!
Not only did Squatty change the household position on pooping
Our Princess pronounced the Squatty to be life changing.
Princess Kinked Colon.
Princess Open Colon
And our Queen, no longer fatigued from waiting outside potty door for Princess to produce,
Lived happily, SQUATTILY, ever after.