Please to enjoy Tricia.
I was a long time lurker on her blog before I commented and subsequently lured her over to our neck of the woods & Im excited to have her here.
I spent a large part of last week slathering lotion on my sunburned and peeling skin. I’d love to show you a visual at this point, but my husband assured me nobody would want to see a picture of it. So you’ll just have to use your imagination.
Why was I slowly shedding my skin? Because I had spent a few days in The Keys which of course entails bathing suits, sundresses (appropriately named apparently) and only a thin obligatory smear of sun block on my shoulders and nose.
Meanwhile anytime my son goes swimming I spend 30 minutes applying a thick coat of sunscreen and make him wear this:
What does that tell me? That I spend a lot more time and energy focusing on my sons well being than my own, which is a demon I thought I had conquered.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think its a bad thing to take care of your loved ones. But I do think it is just as important, if not more so, to take care of yourself. This is a lesson I learned the hard way.
When my son was born I vowed to be the perfect mother. As an infant he only had breast milk and then as he moved onto food I only allowed him to eat organic. Meanwhile I lived off of Taco Bell and Wendy’s.
I obsessed over whether or not my son was getting enough “tummy time” (the baby equivalent to exercise), meanwhile the only form of exercise I got was pacing the floor as I bounced and rocked my son to sleep. Oh yeah…I guess those trips to the refrigerator should count too.
In fact I spent so much time devoted to worrying about him that I remember asking his pediatrician how much light he needed in the house. I was consumed with the fear that our lights were too bright and they were bad for him. So I switched out the bulbs and then I was worried that the house was too dim and his eyes wouldn’t develop properly.
All of that and I never took the time to worry about my own health and visit MY doctor.
Finally when my beautiful baby boy turned one, we both had checkups. HE was perfectly healthy and advanced developmentally. I however, was morbidly obese and had high blood pressure.
He was ready to run, and I couldn’t keep up.
I had both succeeded and failed in being the perfect mother.
Shortly after I changed that “perfect mother” vow to another pledge; I promised myself that I would take control of my life. I would be healthy.
A year later and it was time to see our doctors again. Once again, my son was deemed healthy and advanced developmentally. At my appointment I was no longer morbidly obese, but very happily in the healthy weight range.
And my blood pressure was completely normal.
Guess what I found out? I am able to take better care of my family now that I am taking care of myself. I can’t claim to be a perfect mother, but I can without a doubt claim to be a HEALTHY mother. I set a good example, and the gift of health is one of the best things I can pass along to my son.
Are you ready to put yourself first?
Who will you share the gift of health with?
Jaimie says
June 17, 2010 at 2:16 amawesome post and oh so true! =)
Michelle@Eatingjourney says
June 17, 2010 at 3:25 amI love this woman. She is my daily inspiration for YOU CAN DO IT. The whole idea of breaking down your life into mini-goals and focusing on the now..to get to the future..is so helpful. I adore her.
Jamie says
June 17, 2010 at 4:33 amThis is exactly what I’ve been telling my girlfriend, who is one of the most giving and selfless people I know. She has trouble with putting her own needs before the needs of others. But when you care for yourself, you’re better able to care for those around you.
In the book of John (you know, in the Bible) there’s a story where Jesus talks to a Samaritan woman who’s drawing water from a well. He tells her that people who drink his (metaphorical) living water will never thirst, because they’ll be wells of living water on their own. I know, I know, Bible lessons from the militant lesbian feminist (although I’m not really *that* militant). But hear me out: My point is that when you take care of yourself, you make yourself a deeper well. Put time and energy into your own care, and you find that you have more to give to your family, to your significant other, to your friends, to any cause or person about which (or whom) you’re passionate.
Thanks for setting the bar for all of us, Tricia; you’ve learned this lesson well.
Carly says
June 17, 2010 at 4:35 amGreat post! Tricia I love your story.
Katherine says
June 17, 2010 at 5:16 amGreat post; I always enjoy your site so much. Mind, body and spirit all need to work together.
To be really lame: he is a cheer from high school that makes me think of endurance: let’s get physical, get rough get tough get mean! let’s get physical and roll right over your team! ((I know it’s irrelevant but when said in beat, it gets me pumped))
Joanna Sutter says
June 17, 2010 at 5:48 amYou are awesome! What a great example for your family, other mothers, and single chicks like me!
Shelley B says
June 17, 2010 at 6:12 amTricia gets it – and I love that she made these changes so soon in her son’s life. Great post!
Laura Jane says
June 17, 2010 at 6:14 amGreat post! It is so true that sometimes we focus on everything else so much that we forget about our own health. And even when it comes to help others like spouses and children our own example is so important. Here’s something I recently decided that may not sound like much but it was a big step for me: I love, love, love to bake and I make sourdough bread from scratch each week – super cheap, extra delicious, and I never buy bread from the store. My husband (who doesn’t need to watch his weight) loves the bread and I, of course, say that I’m making it for him. But it’s fairly high in calories and it’s one of my “trigger” foods, and I just have such a hard time staying away from it. I worried that if I stopped making it he would miss out on something that is okay for him to have just because I don’t have perfect self-control. I finally decided he would certainly prefer a healthy wife over some delicious bread, so I’ve stopped making it.
Tracey @ I'm Not Superhuman says
June 17, 2010 at 6:23 amI love your site Tricia because even though I don’t have kids I can relate. Oh, and putting everything else first? Guilty. I hope one day I can be the mom you are.
keila says
June 17, 2010 at 7:02 amGreat post! I so needed to hear this now. It’s kind of one of those things that I know in my head, but in the hassle of day to day I kind of get off track from time to time.
Thanks for helping me realize this and getting me motivated!
Katdoesdiets says
June 17, 2010 at 8:06 amTricia, you are so beautiful inside and out. I think this message of us being better moms when we take care of us needs to be shouted from the rooftops!
Sagan says
June 17, 2010 at 8:10 amI think that to an extent, if we don’t properly take the time to care for ourselves, we will not be able to take care of others in the long term. Like you said, your son was able to run, but you wouldn’t have been able to keep up with him: if we work on ourselves, then we will be even MORE capable of being there to ensure the good health and happiness of others!
So nice to read your story and I hope your skin isn’t hurting too badly from the sunburn 🙂
Christine says
June 17, 2010 at 8:15 amLovely post, and I love the photos! You seriously lost 20 years when you lost weight. You look fantastic (and so does your son!) Happy!
Retta @ RunRettaRun says
June 17, 2010 at 8:54 amWhat a wonderful post! I also found health after having children. Happy and healthy mama means a happy and healthy family!! 🙂
messymimi says
June 17, 2010 at 10:01 amThis is a lesson I learned when my kids were a bit older, but still young enough to catch it.
I still have to be reminded of it now and again, thanks.
Jill says
June 17, 2010 at 10:29 amBe thankful you learned this lesson early – my oldest is 13 years old and I’m finally realizing that I deserve to be cared for as much as they do!
Excellent post! 🙂
deb roby says
June 17, 2010 at 11:22 amLove this. Women need to learn that putting ourselves first is better for everyone.
Cassie @ A Very Busy Mind says
June 17, 2010 at 12:00 pmOooooooh BIG FAN of Tricia. I used to do an “Inspiration” feature on my blog, and she was the first person I had guest post. That girl just puts a smile on my face, and makes me want to get out there and attack life!
Nice choice, Miz!
SeattleRunnerGirl says
June 17, 2010 at 2:00 pmI could not agree more! Part of why NOW is my time is that I haven’t had kids yet. I want to be a good mom, and part of that for me is being HEALTHY, for myself and for them. Awesome to hear from Tricia here!
Patrick says
June 17, 2010 at 6:31 pmThanksfor sharing Tricia’s site, her 150 pound loss is amazing. Going back for some more reading.
Jenn says
June 17, 2010 at 10:32 pmAwesome story!! I’m off to check out your blog Tricia!
charlotte says
June 17, 2010 at 10:33 pmI love this lesson! It’s one I’ve had to learn over and over again as a mother. (PS> I also love your black and white print dress! ADORBS!)
Christina @ A Beautiful Mess says
June 17, 2010 at 11:54 pmWOW! What a transformation, you are such a huge inspiration :O)
karen@fitnessjourney says
June 18, 2010 at 6:07 amChildren have a way of making you think about your future. I used to order something called “the giant burger” at a local restaurant while I was pregnant with my first. The second I laid eyes on him I knew that I needed to be mindful of how I took care of myself so I could be there for him.
Jenn says
June 18, 2010 at 2:21 pmI could have written this post – it is my story but I am two kids later and not at my goal yet… well on my way as you can see in my blog or my twitter feed @66Days. Thank you for sharing you story. It is so encouraging!
Heather says
June 21, 2010 at 8:08 amReally great post. This is something many moms can relate to I think…I’ve recently realized that I can be a good mom and do things for myself too. thanks for sharing your story, it is inspiring.
Linzi (Destination 26.2) says
June 21, 2010 at 11:14 amBeautifully written Tricia! It’s amazing how we tend to worry about everyone else and forget the most important person, ourselves. I do this same thing, and it’s a great reminder that we need to worry about us first so we are in good health to take care of others. Thank you!!
Hanlie says
June 24, 2010 at 4:23 amI love, love, love this post! Thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m sure many mothers fall into that trap, but not many get out of it the way you have. Well done! You are an inspiration!