Loving my aging body (shopping days till 42 announcement)

by

(why YES. I am that goober who RUNS toward her birthday each year!)

People, there are officially twenty days until I turn 42.

And, as trite as it has become, the Great & Mighty Oprah didnt lie: our forties ROCK.

Completely.

Utterly.

Piriformis booboo and all.

Gone is the insecurity & uncertainty of my 20s.

Vanished is the use of other people’s yardstick to measure MY successes of my 30s.

I dont have a big facebook presence,  but when I do reconnect with people from my past many of them remark I look younger now than I did when they knew me.

The veracity of that statement aside, I do know the more I love myself (& my aging bod) where I am *today*—the happier I become.

If that happiness translates to looking younger on the outside, well, that’s just the proverbial protein-icing on the flaxseed birthday cake.

Join me at Fit Studio where Im talking about precisely that: LOVING MY BODY AS IT AGES IS NO LONGER 20.

Hit me up below with your questions, comments & musings on how we can LOVE ourselves through the inevitable changes aging brings.

Whatever you choose just get to focusing on the  loving.

STAT.

Life is waaaay too short not to.

 

**photograph by Kristina Kennedy

 

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Comments

  2. This is really inspirational to read. I’m coming up on 37, and anything that doesn’t try to treat me like a washed up old woman is great to read.

  3. Oh Miz this gives me hope.
    Lately I have felt as though I am fighting gravity and I am 30!

  5. I adore you Miz, but isn’t it easy to love the aging process when you look like you do?

    How about those of us who do not!!

    • OH Id LOVE to discuss this too. I know for me, as I yammered about in the weight loss maintaining post,the moment this journey ALL BECAME about more than the vessel/the bod it ALL clicked into place.

      At that point I still had 30 pounds to lose but, while I still wanted to shed them, it all became less important physically and more about LIFE and living longer and quality of life.

      I loved myself and my bod where I was in that moment. Make any sense?
      (Im on decaf.this morning :))

  9. You people are awake early!
    I need to shed fifty pounds and am about your age Miz.
    I know I can not love this body where it is until I lose weight.

    That and aging is killing me 🙁

    • it is a lot a mental thing up in herre these days too (hello booboo mentioned in post). A daily CHOICE to love the aging and not stop to lament.
      for me I know when I STOP powering onward and lament–it is a downhill lamentation slide 🙂

      xo

  12. I think I am finding my way to this level of comfort and happiness.

    I would not want to go back – for real yo!

    I will take my aging body and be happy with me!

    love you C!

  13. Great post! You’ve tought me so much over the years!

    I love your comment about “not using someone else’s yardstick to measure your success”! So true!

    I look forward to aging and I hope by the time I am 40 (3 years) that I’ll face the next decade with a healthiest body ever as well 🙂

  14. As a freshly turned 40 y.o. I TOTALLY agree. I look and feel better than I did at 30 – yikes!

    Truthfully, I don’t know if I’d be in such a positive space if I didn’t CHOOSE to take care of myself daily. Eating right and exercising. Being in such a healthy space definitely affects my confidence and happiness.

    Kudos for this post.

    Winks & Smiles,
    Wifey

  15. The only thing that draws me out of the depth of hating myself, binging, etc…is the simple word

    Nurture

    We forget, so often, to simply nurture ourselves. Nurture. Is that food gonna nurture? Is the sleep in actually going to nurture? is the working out going to nurture? is the mental talk nurturing me?

    Nurture

  16. Hey, good news Miz:

    The 50’s rock too. Seriously, I never woulda thunk, but so far, every decade seems better to me than the last. Yeah, things break down, but there are work-arounds and the wisdom/peace of mind thing more than makes up for it.

  18. Thank you for responding.

    I’m trying though I do know I would be better if I rocked your arms 🙂

  19. Nurture is a great word/theme/mantra, Michelle. I’m 43 and truly the healthiest physically, mentally and spiritually than I’ve ever been. There are choices I make every day that reinforce all that, but now they are the choices I *want* to make, not the choices I “should” make. Another great thing about getting “older” is that I seem to have more friends who are even older and showing me that I can be fit and active at 50, 60 and beyond. Bring it!

  21. Carla – you are always so inspirational! Honestly, my bod was pretty decent to me in the 40’s. I liked the 40’s a lot! I think I looked my best in my 40’s. It is the 50’s that are crushing me right now – way too many changes that are hard to handle & the emotions are whacked! 😉

    You look amazing!

  23. I think that mentally, I’m in a better place in my 40s than I was in my earlier years…but physically? Things are starting to go wonky for no reason, and that’s annoying. Hard to embrace it sometimes when you wake up with a pain that came on overnight. WTH, body?!? And to hear the medical profession blaming those pains on “well, you’re getting older” now (better than “well, if you’d just lose some weight” but still) – it just makes me want to shake my cane at them!

  24. Tomorrow I’ll be 52. This morning I stood in front of my mirror naked and took assessment of my body. My conclusion? except for the loose skin…

    damn I look good! A lot of my friends and relatives talk about it being “too late” or being “too old” to change their diet and exercise routines.

    I’m here to testify that it’s NEVER too late.

    Because more important than LOOKING GOOD, is the fact that I FEEL GOOD for the first time in decades.

    oh, if I only knew then what I know now…

    BTW, I don’t know if you’d read my hair drama a couple months ago, but I’ve grown out my gray just to see what it looks like… and it looks GREAT. It looks like subtle highlights and the color is just perfect now. There is a lot to embrace about our aging bodies… despite what the media messages are that we’re being bombarded with!

  25. Way to embrace it!! I’m 44 and definitely I think I feel and look younger than my 30s, or maybe it’s because I’m just happier having discovered my inner athlete in my 40’s (and I’m having a blast!). I also have lots of folks in their 50s and 60s and beyond who inspire me with their youthful attitude. I also know some grumpy “old” folks in their 30s.

    Age is truly a state of fitness and a state of mind. Happy Early Birthday!

  26. I totally agree that 40’s are great as far as how I view myself and life in general. One thing I could do without, the hairs that are now growing on my chiny, chin, chin! That ain’t right at ANY age!! 😉

  28. I have a handful of years on you and am actually looking forward, thanks to that dear Oprah, to being fabulous at 50! One thing I can say, in my 20s I had not yet discovered exercise. Without a doubt I am more fit at 48 than 28.

  29. I am healthier now than I ever was as a teen. I treat my body much better and as result it is stronger, leaner, and can perform many physical feets so much better than it did than when I was in my teens or 20s. I think we should focus on what our body is capable of. It’s inner strength. I plan on treating this body well enough that I can be one of those women who completes an ironman in her 90s! 🙂

  31. I’m loving my body more in my 30’s than I did in my 20’s. Because I’m caring for it better, and seeing all the amazing things it can do.

  33. You are such an inspiration to me 🙂 You make me 100% look forward to my 40’s. Turning 30 was tough for me, but with each year I love myself a little more and look forward to what each year has to bring!

  34. I remember hearing you say in a video once your life changed when you no longer looked to others for validation and looked inside you.

    That changed my way of thinking.

    Happy early birthday!

  35. Miz, you think 40’s rock, wait till your 50’s! You may not believe it but (even Oprah said) it is the best decade! You are suddenly, wonderfully liberated from all the anxiety about what other people think and it’s so FREEING! It’s FABULOUS and you have more FUN!

  37. I’m 43, morbidly obese, don’t look nearly as good/thin as I did in my teens, but I still love my body. If you love LIFE, how can you not love the vessel that carries you through it, literally? I’ve nearly lost both parents to cancer and heart disease, said goodbye to my husband as he departed for far-flung parts of the globe knowing I might never see him again, and lost a dear work friend while he was shooting hoops after a long day of meetings. I’ve had to learn the truth that putting anything off – especially body self love – “until” means you’re willing to risk it never happening. And now, in my 40s, I’m no longer willing to accept that risk. If I never lose a pound, I will still love my (now aging AND fat) body.

    • STANDS AND APPLAUDS. and yeah. Im so thankful I got to meet your badassSELF at Fitbloggin

  38. It’s hard to love your body at any age…13, 20, 30, etc. It’s funny now that I think about it, but when I was in high school I actually thought I was fat. I despised my huge warlocks (boobs for anyone not familiar with that term) and my ba-dunk-a-dunk. What I wouldn’t give to have that high school body now. I was fabulous in high school. And NOW, people pay for to get some warlocks and a cabosse like that, well like this b/c I still got em. I wish I had someone tell me back then that my body was beautiful, maybe I wouldn’t have so many body image issues now.

    I am going to be forty in 3 years and you best belive I will be brining it in with a bad a** banging body. As Lil Wayne says, “I’m going to be badder than a three year old.” LOL @ myself.

  39. THIS:
    I wish I had someone tell me back then that my body was beautiful, maybe I wouldn’t have so many body image issues now.

    WE HEAR SO SO SO OFTEN HUH?

    (take heed younger readers 🙂 listen to us oldies)

  41. Amen, mama!! But I could have told you this, ahem, quite a few years ago. I’ll let you know about the next best decade in about 18 months…

    Rock on!

  42. I am 36 and I know how you feel. The 20’s were fun, but confusing at times. My 30’s are awesome so far and I expect my 40’s to be even better.

  43. LOVE this. You are such an inspiration to so many.
    I remember feeling nothing to look forward to on my 25th birthday, loathing my 30th birthday, and this year…jumping for joy on my 35th. It’s been an attitude shift brought on by changing my mindset and changing who I hang out with (less negative nellys more mizfity types). And, I actually feel like I look better right now than I have ever. Is it perception or reality? Who cares! lol.

  44. For me the way I say it is I am determined to be content in whatever state I am in. And that includes a rapidly aging body.

  45. As (I think?) you know, I work for a company called Growing Bolder, which is about ordinary people at ALL ages, doing extraordinary things.

    I’m 31 but featuring the men and women who are truly smashing stereotypes has given me new excitement and inspiration to get and stay healthy as I get older. And it’s also really made me LOVE each year that approaches.

  46. If you think the 40s rock -just wait until you hit the 50s.

    For those questioning whether you love the 40s because of the way you look, I only have to emphasize that the loving your age is because you pay LESS attention to the outside and LEARN TO ENJOY WHAT’S INSIDE MORE.

    You grow into your skin – no matter what shape that skin is in.
    THAT is the wonderful miracle of aging.

  47. I was a mess in my forties. I’m almost 52 now! And baby, you are not “aging” -you are a decade younger than me! I’m not aging yet! Still getting better!

  48. I’ll be 44 in October. Because I didn’t have my first child until I was almost 31, many of my his friends’ parents are younger. I see them at ball games & in other social situations & can’t help thinking THANK GOD I am no longer trapped by that need to always be right. I’ve accepted my body – faults, scars, limits & all. It’s not about the number on the tag anymore. It’s about being strong & knowing I can do whatever I set my mind to. I didn’t truly appreciate that until I entered my 40s. Can’t wait to see what the next decade brings.

  50. I would add this keeps you young,too.

    “just the proverbial protein-icing on the flaxseed birthday cake.”

    LAUGHTER!!

    Happy early birthday.

  52. I’m currently struggling with “other people’s yardsticks” for my 30’s. How did you get over that?

    • I’m 30 Lisa, and I struggle with it too. I’m actively taking time to remind myself of my own accomplishments and to reinforce the self-worth I get from the inside…even going so far as to make a list of ways I find self-worth..

      Sorry to butt in! I just want you to rock your 30’s too! =)

  53. I’ll be 31 in 6 days, and I have spent the better part of the last year trying to let go of the securities of my 20’s. And I’m trying to accept and love myself and the progress I’ve made now…I am trying to take heed! =)

    You are a rock star, and I hope to be as awesome, grounded and considerate as you when I’m 42..and when I’m 32 for that matter.

  54. Hi! I’m new to your blog! via twitter.
    what?! your turning 42?! Look at you, you seriously have the body of a 20 year old. Great motivation to continue to exercise and eat well!

  55. thank you Kenz for jumping in. For me it was everything from affirmations to mantras. And most importantly making the time to learn what my gifts are and OWN THEM.

    I know what I rock at and nothing increases selfesteem and selfworth more than that.

    It can be off putting to others sometimes (owning what you KICK ASS at) but the flip side (and I freely say this) is I know at what I suck and can list that too if asked 🙂

    Really the answer for me is TIME. Making time and the passage of.
    Hope this helps. I’m thumbtyping 🙂

  59. LOVING all the age loving going on around here…I think that for those who are still in their 20s and 30s they just have to wait until they reach their 40s and beyond. I realized that society may place a whole lot of whatever on “youth” but it doesn’t change the fact that it takes some living to feel more comfy in one’s (older) skin. My 40s have been my best decade and I am quickly closing in on 50 and I can’t freakin’ wait!!

    And to Nan who wrote: “I need to shed fifty pounds and am about your age Miz. I know I can not love this body where it is until I lose weight.” I say, NAN?? If you don’t love it now, you never will, so please please PLEASE do yourself a a huge favor and love yourself and your body right now…you might be super-surprised at what happens as a result!!

    I hope Nan sees this!

  62. Great post as always. I feel like I’ve destroyed my body from years of neglect but I still feel so young. I’m only 6 months younger than you. Here’s to feeling young forever!

  63. I’d love to learn more about how you realized you did not need other people to validate you.
    I really struggle with that/

  64. I do so agree! I turned 40 back in March this year and people that see old pictures of me tell me I look better than ever! I completely agree.

  65. I love the fact that I love and appreciate my body so much more at 42 than I did at 22. It kills me how much I used to pick at my imperfections. No I celebrate everything that is still young, strong and fit.

  66. Love ya girl! and I’m 43 1/2 now and loving it!
    Most people don’t realize I’m that old so that’s a bonus 😉

    and to those who haven’t heard it lately…YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL, each and everyone one of you! no matter the age or anything else…you ARE 🙂

  70. You know, I can totally believe this. Each decade has gotten way better than the last one. My 20’s were awesome compared to my teens. My 30’s (thus far) have been light-years better than my 20’s. And hearing you so enthused about your 40s (the part about ditching other people’s yardstick of your success really hit home with me) makes me really excited for what’s coming.
    P.S. I love that our birthdays are so close together!

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