Everything I never knew I always wanted.

by

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Oakland is one of these things.

I’m a movie person.

I should probably say was—motherhood got a hold of me and changed me from a 2 movies a weekend-woman to 2 non-child movies a year mom–but during my intermission I decided to change that.

One of my realizations last week was I need to reintegrate lost pieces of my self-definition and shed those which aren’t working for me.

But I digress.

I’m a movie person.

I’m believer, ala Steve Martin in the piece of cinematic wonderment known as Grand Canyon, answers to all life’s questions can be found in film.

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I’m a movie quoter.

Quoting makes for fantastic instant connection (You loved Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure, too??).

Quoting makes for people thinking I’m crazy (What do you mean “Now, the lady will have the linguini and white clam sauce, and a Coke with no ice.” I don’t understand.)

Regardless, it’s who I am.

Some movies adore upon first viewing and never reflect upon again.

Others may not be Oscar-worthy, yet their quotes immediately invade our family-speak and become permanent fixtures.

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Motherhood is one of these things.

The Matthew Perry AKA Chandler Bing AKA Alex Whitman movie Fools Rush In is an example of such a movie.

The movie was pretty bad, however, 20 years later (!) I still discover myself quoting it in conversation.

Some immediately immediately know the reference (I’m thinking of this woman) and others merely nod in agreement unaware I’m stealing words from Isabel Fuentes.

One of my fave quotes from Fools Rush In is this:

You’re everything I never knew I always wanted.

It’s obvious. It’s perfectly phrased. It’s something I also hear others say to me. They may use different words, but the sentiment is the same.

I was reminded of the line when Kristine Beeson left a comment on a Facebook posting of mine.

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 …reading comment threads gives me things I didn’t know I was looking for.

It was the best compliment ever and the reason I’m still blogging, writing, social media‘ing.

That’s how I define success.

That’s what I aspire to do and to spark in others.

That’s something I freely admit is pretty rare yet, when it happens to me or to others because of me, I rejoice.

You’re everything I never knew I always wanted.

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Moving to Guatemala is one of these things.

The intention I set for this year is to be more silent.

I’d hoped it would help me see the everything I never knew I always wanted around me and to appreciate it.

Kristine’s remark was a needed reminder we already have everything we require—we just need to be open to seeing it/our world that way.

I’m recommitting to viewing my life through that lens for the remainder of 2015.

I’m reminding myself to be silent, keep my eyes mind wide open so I see how, even when life unfolds NOT as planned, it can be everything I never knew I always wanted.

Now you.

  • Have you been surprised by experiences being everything you never knew you always wanted?
  • Can you name the movie from which the “linguini and clam sauce” quote originates?

 

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Comments

  1. I’m not a huge movie person but I do enjoy seeing a good movie. I was shocked to learn that my BFF hadn’t seen ANY of my childhood classics – from Wizard to Oz to Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

  4. This has come to me with aging, Carla.
    I “knew” what I wanted in my youth and if it turned out to not be what I wanted I wouldn’t admit it.

  5. I do that all the time with movie quotes and occasionally get “the stare” but it’s so great when there’s an instant connection!! I haven’t a clue what movie that quote is from but I love that you used it 🙂

  6. So much of the best of my life could fall into everything I never knew I always wanted: Marathoning, my husband, my blog, coaching,
    but they complete me.

  7. fools rush in was 20 years ago? eeek! wow, time flies. But i get it, i and i love it. and I adore your focus. It’s needed. Silent but thankful. You are so wise. as always friend

  8. LOVE LOVE LOVE
    Lately I have been looking at my life and feeling much the same. Where I am today is not where I expected to be. But it is so filled with happiness. So sometimes you just have to enjoy the ride

  9. I’m not really a movie person in general, but there are definitely a few movies that years and years later I still quote.

    I love that quote. I know I’ve felt that sentiment before. My husband definitely fits into that category – he’s not at all like the type of person I expected to spend my life with, but he’s exactly the person I need to spend my life with.

  11. I do this with movie quotes as well as TV shows. I guess I’m a pop culture junkie. But you’re right, sharing movie quotes is a great way to connect with people. I mean, when we go out to eat and someone orders a steak, it isn’t just a steak it’s “the old 96er”…. and you didn’t eat the whole thing…”what about the fat and gristle?”

  13. I find this happens to me frequently, but I haven’t ever captured it this way.
    I don’t see many movies 🙂 I am, however, thrilled when something is everything I never knew I needed or wanted.

  14. I am SUCH a movie person for the same reason. I love that there is so much you can take away from movies!

    (…and will be pondering this line for the rest of my day now…)

  15. “When it comes to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV.”

    Or something like that. I’m more of a song quotes but I loved that movie (my era..I went to school with someone who had to be the inspiration for Spicoli).

  16. Well, what a thought-provoking post! I’d say EVERY day is everything I never knew I wanted (love that quote – I think I’ll give it to my character – with reference to the movie of course – in the new book I’m writing). Each day I think I know what I’m going to do, who I’m going to be, how I’m going to feel. And at the end of each day, I’m surprised that I did more, felt more, was more ME than I ever expected. I’m trying to now appreciate that surprise, each day.

  17. I’m a big movie person too – there’s a lot of quoting that goes on in our house. I always loved that quote from Fools Rush In – as I get older I think I’ve become more in tune with it’s meaning. Has it really been 20 yrs?

    Oh and the linguini quote – Fast Times at Ridgemont High, right?

  18. I feel movies can be an art form and a friend. No question, movies have impacted my life. In my first week of med school, I was pretty depressed and I just happened to watch, “The Blues Brothers.” The message in that movie, if you remember it, connected with me, became my mantra, and everything worked out 🙂

  19. Interesting thing to ponder. I’ll be honest, most of the time I am so overwhelmed with life… that I don’t have time to sit and ponder if this is everything I always wanted. BUT… there are some moments in my chaos where God gives me a glimpse that brings me to calm down to enjoy the moment… to where I know that I am blessed and this is exactly everything that I never knew I always wanted. 🙂

  20. I am stumped. I love your concept!My line form a movie I use all the time: “Look at me, Look at me”Can you guess?

  23. I’m a movie lover, too. Thankfully I *finally* have a job where I can write and share reviews of them! 😀 My husband is the movie quote in our family, though many (most) are from The Godfather. Or Back To The Future.

    I love that phrase: “everything I never knew I always wanted.” I want some of that… and will now seek it, because of you. Thank you.

    Best wishes in Guatemala! Wow!

  24. People on ‘ludes should not drive.

    I know along the way I’ve shared that quoting a comedy routine sealed my love for my husband. He got the quote – NO ONE had ever picked up on it before. We quote movies, TV shows, and comedy routines quite frequently.

    Also? He LOVES Fools Rush In. Makes me laugh. Admittedly, part of it is his uber crush on Salma Hayek.

    As for everything I never knew I always wanted – my whole adult life but also marriage. The second time. I never wanted to get married. I never wanted to have kids. I most certainly never wanted to be a stay at home mom. I wanted to be a high powered attorney in a city with a cool apartment and cool friends but no real attachments (even Freud could figure that one out after 5 minutes glancing at my childhood lol). Instead, a social worker/counselor turned married stay at home mom. I’m not a mom by accident either – I worked hard at both children (adoption and a really difficult pregnancy). Some days I look around and wonder what happened to my life and the me I remember. But I think back on the thousand small decisions that led me here and realize I very deliberately made this life that i never knew I wanted. And most days I’m very happy with it. As the girls get older, I’m struggling to reclaim pieces of the old me but have been to forced to admit that some don’t fit anymore so I’m trying to figure out what the next thing is that I never knew I always wanted.

  25. “Clear your mind. Think of something happy and pleasant .” Enter the Stay-puf marshmallow man.
    My favorite movie is Ghostbusters. It has everything I need. Plus laughs.

  26. I grew up a serious movie person, I remember watching my favorite movies back to back to back when I was in collage. I also agree some of the best quotes come from movies, you have inspired me to be true to myself and watch more movies. I have no kids so I don’t have any excuses.

  27. I am going to have to think about what my word should be. It’s funny I wasn’t a movie at all when I was younger, but now that I don;t have a young one anymore and I have dates with my hubby we go top movies a lot and I just love to escape and laugh. Can’t handle the serious stuff!

  28. This might sound odd, but I’ve had a very difficult time lately and it’s been an experience that I would never, ever have wished for. However, I am seeing the effect that it is having on me as a person. I’m seeing personal growth and it has helped me become the person that I’ve always wanted to be- even though it has been so hard. So I guess in a way it is everything I never knew I always wanted… in a different way than the quote was probably meant. 🙂

  29. One specific aspect of my LIFE right now = everything you never knew you always wanted, and I am enjoying every second… And I am about to continue to do so… RIGHT NOW!

  30. Yes! I am ALWAYS thinking of movie and TV quotes and things. I suppose that could mean that I have compiled too many hours of staring at a screen, but hey, I like it. 🙂

    Also, things do come to me that I never thought mattered before. I do wonder if that’s an aging thing…I mean, as you get older you appreciate the things in life more as you hear when you are a kid.

    If you told me I’d be where I am doing the things that I am doing right now when I was 17 or 18 years old, I would have laughed and thought you were nutty. Life is unpredictable and fun like that.

  31. While i don’t see many of them, a few movies have made an indelible impression.

    There are a good many things i have now that i never knew i wanted or needed.

  32. It’s not When Harry Met Sally, is it?

    I’m a movie person, too, but like you, not so much anymore–unless it’s a family movie. I need to get out more!

    My biggest surprise in life–being a mom, hands down. Never thought I wanted to do it and it goes beyond saying that I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

  34. I love Fools Rush In! I thought when I saw the title of this that you were going to tell me to follow my heart on HUGE career changing that’s been weighing heavily. But you didn’t. Maybe I’m just looking for someone to tell me. I need a little push sometimes. 😉

  36. I love that you love to quote movies…One of my favorite Steve Martin movies was “Dirty Rotten Scoundrels”…I used to be able to quote that one all the time! 🙂

  38. Not sure about the experience thing (in terms of experiencing something I never knew I wanted). Probably the last few years of my life have been the best in many ways. (So it’s interesting I spent so much time studying for my degree and MBA and working diligently to get ahead when it seems I wanted none of that!) Maybe the thing I’m surprised I love is yet to come.

    PS. I can’t quote from movies or books. I can barely remember what I read earlier this week let alone remember a line from it. Although… I do have those comfort movies which I watched again and again and I’d probably remember lines from those if pressed!

    Deb

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