A failure to Jyze.

by

Because I had a guest poster bail at the last minute I give you one of my fave posts.

Second only to Failure to Jyze: Part 2 in how hard it made me laugh.

Please to enjoy.

It is with a heavy heart Im here to announce I hath failed you.

This post was supposed to be a Tuesday Testdrive (review) and, instead, Im here to wave the white flag oā€™surrender.

(cue mournful music)

The culprit?

The product I wholly & utterly adored the promise of?

The Jyze.

(Iā€™ll wait while you click on the link.Ā  You simply must.)

People, I had visions of my Jyzing all around town.

Jyzing as I chased the toddler about the yard.

Jyzing as I wandered the aisles in my local grocery.

Jyzing as I did my morning interval training on the recumbent bike.

Jyze. Jyze. Jyze.

Alas, it was not to be.

Yes, I can admit I was partially attracted to the silliness factor (fits perfect into my philosophy of PLAYouts) yet more than that I loved multitasking opportunity the Jyze offered.

The promise of burning more calories through the addition of an upper body component to my cardio? WHATā€™S NOT TO LOVE?

ahhhh.

Whatā€™s not to love?

For me it was the Jyze.

*sigh*

To know me is to know how I hate to give a negative review.

This isnt a negative review, however, to the extent this MizFit never Jyzed an inch.

Now, the Jyze is *thoughtfully* sent to consumers prewound so I must emphasize that, were you not proud Mama to a Tornado who ā€˜helpedā€™ & UNwind the device for you, you may quickly & easily have gotten to Jyzing.

Me? Not so much.

After the Tornado unwound the device, I grabbed the explanatory insert & commenced what I thought would be a quick rewind.

And I struggled.

And I twistedturnedlooped&tugged.

I grabbed my laptop & clickclicked over to the Jyze site where they explain three different methods to rewind the product.

Method one? FAIL. (interspersed with shouts of COME ON JYZE! Dont fail me now! Youā€™re up on Tuesday!)

Method two? FRICK! This thing is killing me! Didnt work.

Method three: CRAP! Couldnā€™t quite master it either.

And believe me, Im not conveying well, either, how silly slap happy I became toward the end of attempt number three.

In all honesty, I received a pretty damn good core workout whilst laughing at myself & my lack of Jyze winding skillz.

Was I frustrated? Yes, but mainly because Iā€™d be so eagerly anticipating hitting the streets of my ā€˜hood, Jyzing to my hearts content & seeing what the neighbors had to say.

Would they laugh? Would they long to join in? Would I grow fatigued? Would I be able to carry on a conversation wilst Jyzing?

All these questions were forced to remain unanswered.

Being the patient woman I am I called my husband at the office & pestered him until he came home waited until the Ren Man was free and sought his help.

Suffice it to say he didnt appreciate the fact I almost wet my pants laughing at his Jyzeā€™ttempts.

He, too, read the insert, watched the video & then constructed his own method of winding involving his chin & some tape.

No (it didnt work) no (I didnt get it on film. I tried, believe me.) and NO (DICE with the winding).

Much to my chagrin, I was still 100% Jyze-free.

Now, in defense of the company their customer service is amazing.

When I emailed saying I was having trouble figuring out how to wind the device mere moments after hitting send I received an emailĀ  response.

The individual gave me two other suggested tactics (didnt work for me) & an offer to call if I still couldnā€™t wind the Jyze.

I didnt call.

I havent talked to some family members in months itā€™s so freakinā€™ hard to make a call with the Tornado underfoot.

So thatā€™s really it, people.

I give you the Tuesday Testdrive that never was (and, perhaps, the Jyze if you make a really good case & willĀ  pay for shipping.).

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11M-MboJz2E

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Comments

  2. Oy, what a name! I can imagine this as something I use once and then unwind and, like you, never manage to get it back together. Thus, it would sit in the corner, where I would glance occasionally and swear to use it before distracting myself with something that did not need winding.

    I kinda wish you’d managed to show us how to use it but your tale of woe is very entertaining!

  3. LOL, I have been around too long as I remember the first post – loved it then.

    Jyzing is up there with hoolas for me too šŸ™ – but I CAN juggle, ha!

  4. OH
    MY
    GOSH!
    This is so hilarious and I think I like the second post you linked more.
    Their email??
    Your video??

    Made my day, Miz.

  6. Oh Miz this is one of my favorite posts too!
    As is the second one.

    That company realllly wanted you promote their product šŸ™‚
    I always wanted a third post where the owner came to your house…

  7. This is so hilarious and I think I like the second post you linked more.

    I like the second one more too, but couldnt post that without the first. I laughed so freakin hard making video #2 it WAS a workout šŸ™‚

    I always wanted a third post where the owner came to your houseā€¦

    I need to search for the READER who made a HOMEMADE JYZE and got it to work (& sent me a video)—THAT was impressive…

  9. I am a newish reader and had missed this.

    Does it make me a stereotypical male that I now want to offer to buy it from you so I can “make” it work??

  18. Hehe good ol’ Jyze. I think they should give them as freebies at the next blogging conference and everyone can walk around Jyzeing-it-up. It would be great.

  24. TOO FUNNY
    I have to agree with whomever said it abouve, however, that the second post you link is way funnier!

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