How letting go of dieting is crucial to self-love (guest post).

by

sensualappeal

Hello! My name is Kammie and I am the blogger behind Sensual Appeal – where everything is delicious, mindful, and happy. I’m honored to have the opportunity to share my story today with you. Big shot out to Carla – you’re awesome!

Today, I wanted to share my story from last year that had the biggest impact on my life thus far. It created a huge shift in my perspective and outlook on life.

You see – I’ve been a chronic dieter for many years. I restricted and exercised obsessively followed by periods of binging and feeling sorry for myself. The weight went up and down like a roller coaster: it was rapid, it was overwhelming, it was discouraging.

For years, I’ve let my diet struggles define me. For years, I’ve internalized the failed diets I went on, thinking they were always my fault – that I wasn’t strong or motivated enough. I called myself a lazy failure and gave up. A week or two later, however, I’d be at it again – motivated again with the vicious cycle starting once again.

This went on for years until my psyche was torn down and exhausted. I was sick and tired of the incessant pain I was causing myself. Despite all the things I kept telling myself about my good intentions, I was still ridden by guilt, shame, and desperation.

Then, a shift happened. I gave up.

I stumbled upon a book that changed my view on dieting forever. Upon learning about Intuitive Eating, it made so much sense to me – I knew there was no way in hell would I ever be happy with the way I was treating my body and my mind at the time. If this went on, I would only get worse and worse- my mind, body, and spirit would continue getting a beating and the recovery time would get shorter and shorter.

I couldn’t bear another diet. I couldn’t bare more shame.

I embraced the IE practice and let it take over my life. This shift happened in March 2013. The process has taken many months and it is still in the process of finishing its course but it has made a profound impact on my being.

I went from chronic dieting to accepting myself for who I am and how I look like, regardless of my weight and cravings.

I started focusing on self-love rather than shame and guilt.

I started learning what foods I actually like and dislike – being more mindful while eating and throwing away the notion of “good” and “bad” foods, thus starting to truly live a balanced life.

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I focused on being happy and joyful.

The change was a huge one and I couldn’t be happier for having made it.

While I am no longer the size I was when I was in the midst of my disordered eating patterns, I also longer feel as miserable as I did then. While I had my good days and proud days because of the way I looked – I now can smile at myself in the mirror regardless. I have the courage to ask for help when I need it. I have taken the time to really get to know ME. Who I am deep inside and I’ve started to work on personal development that is deeper than an issue of dieting or weight loss.

I’ve begun to learn about myself so that I can continue to grow in the many years to come.

And my story is till being written.

Thank you again to Carla for the awesome job with the blog.

I hope this post inspired you to reflect on your own situation and realize that regardless of how crappy you might sometimes feel, there are better days ahead – no matter what. 🙂

If you liked what I said, I’d love for you to check out my blog at Sensual Appeal Blog.

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Comments

  1. The “right” weight is so overrated! Happiness is definitely more important 😉 And I love the looks of that pizza!

  2. Kammie! I love you <3

    I didn't know you were into IE – we could have had so much more to talk about in Chicago! I became an IE counselor in 2012 after the book changed my life. I slip up at times and get caught in diet mentality again, but overall that book was a life saver.

  3. My weight loss story is similar to yours. I scoffed when people suggested I stop dieting, but when I finally couldn’t take it any more and “gave up” things really did fall into place, and I am healthier than I’ve ever been. I hate to say this to others because I never believed it myself, but maybe if enough of us spread the word ….

    • Yeah dieting can really be a vicious cycle and I’m so glad to hear you’ve “given up” as well – mental health is so important and being healthy in the mindset usually will lead a healthier body as well. It’s all about respect – for the body, the mind, the soul. Thank you for reading xo

  5. I’m amazed at how many people have been in the same disordered eating/over-dieting/unhealthy place. I never realized it when I was there myself. I still struggle with not being the same size I was then, but I’m so much happier and healthier. Great post, thanks for sharing your story.

  8. Great job getting to a healthy place with food and diet. The constant dieting cycle can be so destructive on many levels. I think your story is a great one to share and inspire!

  9. IF you are still talking about weight/food (even tho you say you are “over” dieting, and making bad choices) then you are still being controlled by food -writing about it, thinking about it, taking pix of it. All part of a disorder if you ask me. Oh, you didn’t, but I can still have my opinion.

    • I will have to respectfully disagree. I do agree that if we constantly talk about it, then we do feel consumed by the thoughts of food and food still therefore has control over how we feel and how we live. However, I don’t think “taking pix of it” and talking about it has to be disordered. I love food. There’s no reason to pretend I will someday forget to love food – it is a life source and it deserves to be recognized as such. However, I think it’s different to have it control your life where you constantly talk about it and think about it (Which is not the case for me anymore) AND having it be a part of your life and you embracing it and living with it the way it deserves to be recognized. (I think this is the way to do it, respectfully).

  10. Amen! I was recently criticised on my blog by promoting yogurt due to the sugar content in it. My feeling is that there is no BAD or GOOD food. It’s important to understand moderation.

  12. Jeez, that pizza looks so good! It’s totally ok to treat yourself every once in a while. I mean, it’s true that there is no number on happiness. Eating something delicious IS enjoyable. But also there is moderation. You know your limits better than anyone else.

    Eating very unhealthy (even if delicious) can also result in unhappiness just as much as dieting too much. If you gain 30 pounds, you probably won’t be very happy. I know because I’ve done it, eating fast food 3 times a day. It felt great to eat better and healthy.

    I knew that I was overeating. That was the problem 🙂 Now I’m making natural juices and enjoying trying out new recipes and new veggies. While at the same time pigging out every once in a while.

  13. It really is amazing how easy it is for one little number to have so much power over us. I love the sentence “I focused on being happy and joyful”; isn’t that really what it’s all about?
    xo

    • Indeed it is, but it’s so easy to forgot that! Focusing on the wrong things, the things that aren’t that important but they feel so crucial at the time… happiness is what stays with us as we age, and that’s what should have the highest priority, imo 🙂

  14. I have always been on and off with diets. I have learned through the years that you got to live it up and accept and love yourself. Thanks for sharing!

  15. My story was similar — 30 years on that roller coaster, beginning at age 12. Then, i decided, i’d had enough. As i began to see food as a way to nourish myself, and eat only when i was hungry and what i knew my body loved and needed, the cycle stopped. That was 8 years ago this summer, and i’m healthy and at a good weight.

    Keep preaching this, it needs to be heard.

  16. I see so many working to find what works for them vs. “dieting.. a happy thing to see!

    For me, some may say I have a diet but even when I lost weight way back when, it was never a diet for me, it was a change in the way I ate & what was going to work for me long term.. 🙂

  20. Great guest post Kammie, you made a great point and I am sure that this post will touch many readers and have a positive effect on their lives.
    While I had no idea there was an actual book about this, the concept of intuitive eating was quite familiar to me. Like many of us, I’ve also had my fair share of crash dieting, starving and binging, but fortunately soon enough, I realized that it’s the way it was always going to be, again and again, so I decided throw away all those thoughts and try to be more gentle with myself.

    Thank you for writing this!

  21. I love this guest post! I am working on IE as well. It is hard being in the fitness industry and we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to eat a certain way, look a certain way, and the pressure adds up. This year I am working on “nourishing” my body and mind and to take better care of myself. Thank you for sharing your story!

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