I’ve been thinking about what it means to be brazen since Carla’s original post and call to action to live brazenly alongside her.
Why do so many of us – as was seen in the comments – think of brazen as bad?
To live boldly and without shame?
To work in a way that’s “unrestrained by convention?”
To be unapologetically ourselves?
I read those words and my heart says, “Yes! Yes, that’s what I want.”
So?
Why I am not accepting the challenge yet?
Because there’s nothing bad about brazen, until I find myself in a position to be it. And I cave.
I become shy about what I think. Meek when invited to express my honest opinion. Shamed by small mistakes I may have made or words I used and since thought better of.
Why?
There’s certainly a feminist case to be made, though it’s not my particular area of interest or expertise so I’ll leave that case to be made by someone else.
My area of interest is observing and understanding the human condition – then I write about it. I do this so I can understand why we are the way we are and how I can live a life I want, and not the life others want for us.  I strive to live my life with intention which is why I’m troubled by how negative we all consider the word brazen.
As if, the “good” way to live is cowardly and with shame.
Restrained by convention.
Constantly apologizing for ourselves.
Good or bad, this is how most of us live day to day.
I know this is how I live to day to day, even while I am working on being powerful, loving and compassionate.
You know why?
Because I’m afraid.
It’s that simple.
In order to be brazen, I need to be willing to accept potential consequences I am not willing yet to accept.
I am willing, however, to perform brazen acts.
To write boldly.
To shamelessly and unapologetically mother my children.
To be unrestrained by convention in some ways, but not others. (I live on a kibbutz in Israel, after all).
And perhaps, as with many of my fears, I’ll find in time that the more I act brazenly, the closer I am to being brazen.
That one day, a day will come when I am 100%, always and everywhere, unapologetically me.
And owning it.
Jen Maidenberg grew up in New Jersey and recently moved to a kibbutz in Israel with her husband and their three young children in search of … something. Something greener, something slower. A more mindful life. She blogs about her life as an working immigrant mother and a woman on her way to 40 at http://imadealiyah.wordpress.
Lilly says
March 28, 2014 at 4:43 amI completely understand this, too.
I fear the being real.
Healthy Mama says
March 28, 2014 at 4:51 amI love when you share being brazen is accepting consequences.
I know in a sense (there is a quote about this I think?) I am fearful of my own brazen!
Yoli says
March 28, 2014 at 9:36 amYes!!!
I love this post.
Linz @ Itz Linz says
March 28, 2014 at 4:53 am“and owning it” LOVE!
Bea says
March 28, 2014 at 5:13 amI think it is something we all struggle with: “be unrestrained by convention.”
The desire to fit in is part of human nature as is the duality of wanting to stand out!
Deb says
March 28, 2014 at 6:08 amOwning it brings to mind the swagger my 7 year old has.
I want that swagger!!! 🙂
Melissa Chapman says
March 28, 2014 at 6:46 amThis post is your beginning! Your words cut right to the core. I feel them and I feel you cracking your protective shell and a brazen jen emerging
Paula says
March 28, 2014 at 7:31 amMy shell is really thick as well.
This is hard, but important I think to role model for my twin girls.
Jenny says
March 28, 2014 at 7:52 amI LOVE this! And can so relate.
I think the definition of Brazen differs by person. For me– when I read in your bio that you went from Jersey to Israel– well girlfriend– to me– that was BOLD and BRAZEN and COURAGEOUS! And something I’d never have the “stones” to do.
Inspiring! 🙂
mimi says
March 28, 2014 at 8:23 amSome things i’m not ready to tackle quite yet. Getting there, though, and that’s the important thing.
Yum Yucky says
March 28, 2014 at 8:55 amI remember Carla’s call to be brazen, and then did nothing about it. Ugh. I am brazen in some ways already, but there’s more in me. Thank for you this post today. I’ve got to raise the stakes on my brazen living. That’s the way I want it. Now it’s time to do it.
John says
March 28, 2014 at 10:48 amLove those inspiring words. Thank you for sharing this. I think everyone could stand to be a bit more brazen.
Coco says
March 28, 2014 at 7:21 pmLove the honesty here. I think we’re all more brazen then we think when it comes to things we are passionate about, but maybe we need to be more willing to be brazen for our own sakes.
cheryl says
March 29, 2014 at 4:53 amI think that moving your family to Israel and doing what you are doing is pretty “brazen”.
Focus on the “ARE” in the word instead. Because you ARE pretty brazen. Matter of perspective.
Tina says
March 29, 2014 at 6:29 amYes! Yes!!!
Elena says
March 29, 2014 at 5:59 pmThis: “Constantly apologizing for ourselves.” — is something that I am working on- every single day. Even though I think I have made progress, when push comes to shove, I retreat- making excuses and trying to be what others want or need me to be. Thank you for the reflection and inspiration!