Thirty days till 43.

by

Please commence gazing into this:

 

For some reason Im really excited about my birthday this year.

Typically Im more about other people’s day of birth mainly because I make time to celebrate and indulge myself daily.

This year, however, Ive been pondering and planning and *deciding* how Ill spend my celebratory 24 hours already.

Im not sure if it’s because it falls on a weekday & making that WORKfree feels decadent or if it’s because Ive been reminded repeatedly this year how fleeting life is.

Which brings me to the point of my post (no, we arent going to merely gaze into navel the entire time):

People frequently remark to me how young I look & that I dont look 42.

The thing is—I do.

I know I do.  I life-guarded too many summers during the time of “lets slather with babyoil!” to not look at *least* my age.

Of course I merely say thank you (as I do not want to denigrate their kind words), yet I know what they’re complementing is my young spirit & my ability to love and accept my rapidly wrinkling countenance aging bod.

What they perceive as ‘youthful’ is my pointy packpack.  The fact Im the comfy in my own skin-suit.  The way I’ll play and laugh with the Tornado without fretting about being “proper” or grownup.

Whether my outer appearance reflects my inner youfulnessment may be debatable, but the fact this will change is not. 

Im going to A-G-E.  A lot lot.  If Im lucky.

Whats important to me isn’t I never lose my muscle tone it’s I never misplace my love and appreciation for my aging vessel.

The below is a snippet from a recent interview.  It contains all my ‘loving my aging bod tips’ straight from my keeping-young-through-the-cardio-I-DONT-love misfit heart.

I’ve coined an acronym (because to know me is to KNOW I love me some acronyms) for my  peeps who remain skeptical about embracing our aging bodies as they are today (not ten pounds or more muscle or *anything* from now).

Appraise yourself internally not externally. Is your energy boundless? Can you literally or figuratively run circles around other moms at the playground?  Can you hoist your suitcase into the overhead bin without needing help? Make time to acknowledge and *celebrate* these facts.

Give yourself a break. My self-love skyrocketed when I embraced the fact I no longer looked twenty. No matter how “young” I may or may not look for 40+—I’d never be 20 again.  There are certain, uh, garments I may never again wear outside the privacy of my home.   There are activities I may not excel in (like Roller Derby) because I no longer have a 20 year old back.  Having that awareness allows me to take more risks because my expectations are realistic (<—- PONDER THIS. It was life changing for me.)

Express gratitude for today… tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. Do I really want to waste my time obsessing over gaining three pounds when the alternative is not being here?  And, just when I think Ive got this one covered, something happens to remind me of the frailty of life.  I EASILY choose to be thankful for my careening toward old age bod when faced with the alternative.  And, most days, Im able to also choose LAUGHING at the coming/already here indignities of the aging process.

And thats where I am on this THIRTY MORE DAYS! Monday.

  • Appraising myself from the INSIDE out.
  • Planning a fun, festive & work-FREE birthday.
  • Giggling at the Groupon I just received for BOTOX.

and you?

How do you *pause* & celebrate YOU as each birthday passes?

Got any additional tips for aging with joy not a grimace?

Wanna come play with me on 7.18?

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Comments

  3. This makes me so happy! I love adults who can be playful and silly. I saw on a blog today this quote –> ” you are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely” Life IS too short — enjoy it 🙂
    ALSO i love the part where you say, “Express gratitude for today… tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. Do I really want to waste my time obsessing over gaining three pounds when the alternative is not being here?”
    THIS IS ESPECIALLY TRUE TO PEOPLE IN MY AGE GROUP. Everyone is always “lose weight lose weight lose weight” . ahhh i can go on and on. I’m definitely reposting ! thank you for this, have a great BDAY!

  4. You captured much of how I feel! I’m excited for your birthday too, to see how you do spend the day! I turned 45 this year and also get the “you look younger than you are” thing. It’s not because I look 20 but because I celebrate each day too and have plenty of fun and silliness in the mix.

    When I turned 45 in March, I celebrated with a 4500y swim, 45 bike, and 45 pullups over three days. (http://unblob.blogspot.com/2012/03/birthday-week-kick-off-swim-4500y.html; http://unblob.blogspot.com/2012/03/45-pull-ups-birthday-adventure.html; http://unblob.blogspot.com/2012/03/final-45-installment.html)

  5. I turn 43 in September and I’m taking a leaf out of your book this year! We are never to old to play and frolick and be awesome.

  6. I love that you are excited about your birthday, and that people like you are making the forties look fun and not something to dread! Also, YES to the whole “life’s not guaranteed” thing. So HELLS YES to enjoying every day!!! 🙂

  7. I’m only in my 20s, but need to remember this as I age.

    It happens to us all even though I can not imagine to me 🙂

    You rock, Mizzy.

  9. I feel the same way about birthdays. I am 44 but that is just a number, I love who I am at this stage of my life. Life never gets easier but you learn that the tough times will pass. I focus on health and fitness, instead of looking good in a bikini and loosing weight. I feel more beautiful now than ever, I embrace my wrinkles and grey hair because I am living in the “now”. When you long for the past, that is when you start having an internal battle, one you will loose eventually. I love your posts, they always get me thinking and keep me present. xo

    • I cant decide if it is prideful or not to say ME TOO!
      but
      uh
      ME TOO 🙂
      and thank you.

  11. I love the reminder to examine ourselves internally.
    My blood work and all else rocks.
    I hate my cellulite.

    I need to navel gaze 🙂 and look internally more.

    Great post as always, Carla.

  13. I was just about to say that you don’t look 42 or almost 43 and that’s because you don’t act 42. Your heart is young, your body reflects it, yet your mind is so wise. Now that’s worth celebrating! Can i bring you chia cake? tee hee

  14. I’m always really excited about my birthday, maybe it’s an only child thing? I too would agree I feel like life has gotten better with age and I know some day my skin will wrinkle and if i’m lucky it will be laugh lines

  17. This is an especially timely post for me as my birthday was yesterday. We share the philosophy of you are only as old as you feel (and act). For some reason, I have always loved birthdays and celebrated myself them to the fullest. This year that included a decadent carb-filled brunch with my family. And I loved every minute of it. Happy 30 More Days!

  18. Just 24 hours for the birthday? We like the birthday week LOL!

    I love the birthdays. It’s a day that I tend to reflect a lot on and how much more I enjoy life now than I did when I was younger.

  20. Another great one! “Do I really want to waste my time obsessing over three pounds when the alternative is not being here?” I so needed to hear that!

  23. Well, as the old expression goes, aging sucks but it beats the alternative! No, really, aging does bring aches and pains and reading glasses and forgetfulness… but it also brings, IMO, more self acceptance and more wisdom and less caring about what others think. Do I wish I LOOKED younger? Well, these jowls, ugh. But I’m thinking I’m going to follow in Oprah’s footsteps and be fabulous at 50! (And this post has inspired me to count down the days!)

  25. With each passing year, I say to myself, “you’re still young! You’re only (insert age here)” 😉

    But really, enjoy your birthday and celebrate YOU and your life 😀

  26. Words of wisdom! You should totally celebrate for the whole month of July though…it is your bday month 😉

  27. I love this post! A while ago I realized that pretty much everything I do these days is about the “inside.” And that feels good and right at this stage of my life.

    Happy countdown to your birthday! Make it a fabulous 24 hours! 🙂

  28. July 19th? I’m in — after my dentist appt. 😛
    Appreciate your body
    Go the extra mile every day
    Except when you need a break!

  29. I’m trying to embrace every birthday each year as I get older. Like you, I loved the sun a little too much in my teens and 20s. Care to share your Groupon deal for Botox? 🙂

  30. I hope you have happy days leading up to your birthday and a happy birthday! 🙂 I like the “express gratitude for today” part. I’m always looking ahead, but it’s good to just appreciate the now.

  31. Well, you could have been writing to me cause you know how hard I take aging!! 😉 Well, at your age, honestly, I felt great & was some of the best years for me – the 40’s.. REALLY! I did not feel the aging or the bod stuff then.. it was the 50’s so come talk to me when you hit them. 😉 I KNOW YOU WILL EMBRACE – just teasing you!

    BUT this post has lots to say & lots for people to think about because honestly, the way my bod is changing is really hard for me. I know it is inevitable but it is still hard.

    THX CARLA! I can’t wait to celebrate with you virtually! 🙂

  33. God I just LOVE your spirit. That’s what keeps you “young” — its that zest for life, that passion for truly living each and everyday as if it were your last. PS can I come help you celebrate??? How fun!

  34. I am really trying to do your ‘A’ but in the summer when everyone seems to be thiner than me it is hard! :/

    • this is like EVERY OTHER THING IN MY LIFE TOO (translation: I get it :-)).
      I have to rise each morning and recommit.
      no matter how I, uh, felt yesterday.

      xo

  35. There is so much I love about this post. Some days I struggle with the knowledge that no matter how much strength I can build or how much more weight I can lose, I will never look like my twenty year old self again. Then, I remind myself, that’s ok.

    Better to work hard to be the best me I can be than sit still and “just be” letting the time pass.

  37. Love the post and you!!!!
    And speaking as your elder (I got you beat by 1 1/2 yrs)
    I’m all for all your points and practice them myself!
    I know I will never be the 20’s version of me, but I’m ok with who I am and how I am right here at 44.5 and improving 😉

  39. You DO have the best attitude! Aging is normal, natural, and a positive thing, when viewed in a positive way. Internal appraisal, like your other tips, are key at every age.

  40. It’s funny but I’ve never been a big birthday person and just realized that my birthday is fast approaching. I love your “G” – that’s been a huge one for me as I’ve gotten older and have watched my body recover from injury.

  43. Ah, youngster. At 54 I still try to think this way.

    This made me think of an old Gloria Steinham quote. When she turned 40, somebody told her that she looked young for her age. Her answer was, no, this is what 40 looks like.

  45. Your post is very timely as I turn 32 today. Thanks for the reminder to celebrate each passing year!

  46. Your spirit, positive attitude, and grateful heart shine…radiate. Yep.
    You know I’m superfantastically excited for 36. I keep telling hubby, it’s a milestone, which of course it’s not, but I want to celebrate! 7 more days…

  47. Happy 30-days-til-43! Let me also agree that I lovelovelovelove your attitude and your brain! 🙂 I dreaded 30 until I realized on my morning run on my 30th, that I felt younger and happier than I did at just about any point in my 20s. Now, I just realize I need to train harder because as I approach a new age group (35 in 2014), it will be that much more competitive! 🙂

  48. Lovelovelove that attitude and your brain. Happy 30-days-til-43! 🙂

    I feared 30 until I realized when I was out for a birthday run that I was happier, healthier, and just more comfortable being me than I had been at all in my 20s. I love my 30s! I am only dreading 35 because I go up an age group in racing and things get more competitive, heh.

  51. Not gonna lie – I’d rather have my 43 year old knees than these 53 year old ones! I remember telling a friend when in our 20s that I had a goal to be an interesting old person. Let’s go for that goal together though how are we going to know when we’re old?

  52. I am definitely the type that would rather celebrate someone else’s birthday than my own. Which works out perfectly, because my younger brother was born on my birthday 4 years later! Best birthday present ever! hehehe. BUT if I had to choose, I’d spend the entire day outside having “active” fun. 🙂

  53. I wish I could come play with you on your special day!!!

    Love your attitude and your outlook on birthdays and the difference between how you look and feel.

    I’ve recently stopped looking back on each year on my birthday and rather started looking ahead. No longer upset about what I didn’t do during xx year, but excited for what I hope to do in the next.

    I think having a baby helped me refocus and change my outlook. I owe it all to my little guy =)

    • Me as well.
      I just want to LIVE to see mine grow up and discover her path in life.
      It all becomes about sticking around I think once we have kids or find a partner in life or a passion or…

  54. Friday morning the Tornado and I got up early (4am) to fly to Chicago to see my niece graduate from Northwestern. (Talk about feeling old — my sister’s youngest just graduated from college, while mine just “graduated” from kindergarten.) Asking the Tornado if she was angry/tired at being up so early, Miz made an “angry face” and asked “do you feel like this?” To which the Tornado responded, “like an old woman?” Out of the mouths of babes…

  56. Oh you young ‘uns. The fun is just beginning!

    In 12 days I’m rolling over the decade that begins with 6! To celebrate, first next week I am attending the super fun Strength Camp up at BodyTribe. -Last year, FitStanley joined me.

    On my birthday, it is dinner out and BRAVE.

    The following Monday, my girlfriends give me a party with red and white food (how creative can we get?) and their suggestions for my bucket list.

    And I’m opening up the bucket list idea to everyone! What should aim to do in the next 40 years? Cause I’m going to hit the century mark.

    I can’t wait!

  57. at 10 months to 30, I am 10 shades of unready to reach that particular milestone. I *wish* I had your outlook. I think being an actor, under a microscope, makes it harder.

    I wish…

  58. I AGREE Cat. For me I do know lots of it is never having been a great beauty. Im fine 🙂 but looks have never been how I defined myself. And also defining myself as a writer. There is zero pressure there with regards to appearance.
    It IS easier.

  59. Being a member of the male persuasion, age just makes me better. As do the pounds I pack on and the hair I lose. Thank goodness for being able to deceive yourself.

    Mid-40’s was when I finally realized that I’d never be that “20-something” ever again. But now in the “late 50’s” I’m perfectly happy with my aging self. The happiness of maturity more than makes up for the step (or two, or three) that I’ve lost. The relationships and perspective that I’ve gained are a fair trade for not being able to do everything I used to do. And the memories and experiences I’ve got are something I wouldn’t trade for anything.

    And inside me somewhere, there’s a fit, slim 18-year-old who’s as pissed as hell and can’t get out.

    • uh oh. Have you been in my email today? It seems the masses DO think it’s far easier to age as a man.
      Now I want a guest post from the MANs POV 🙂

  61. Learning to appreciate our bodies for what they can do- their strength, flexibility, function- helps me when I’m not always happy with what I see. I think maybe what people are getting at is you don’t look like most 40-something year olds! It’s obvious you take great care of yourself, and that makes you look (and feel) young.

  62. I absolutely love how you own your choices and yet remain so positive with your attitude. You have a unique ability with that. And a unique ability to show us what feeling ‘young’ is really all about.
    When we feel good, it’s especially fun to celebrate ourselves! I hope your day is exactly what you’re hoping for.

  63. I turn 30 in 73 days, and I’ll be honest with you – I can’t wait. CANNOT WAIT. Why?

    Because, unlike most of the people I know my age, I’m fitter now than I have ever been in my life. I’m happier. I’m more confident in who I am, and I don’t fear aging. I embrace it. I love this post, because it’s exactly how I see getting older. I love everything about what you symbolize, Carla.

    PS: LOL about the botox. 😉

  66. Great attitude. I’m almost the opposite – but it’s more to do with things I haven’t achieved as much as anything… it’s like life has passed me by and I’ve missed out (relationship, kids etc) and getting older reminds me that it’s now too late!

    I do realise though that I need to consider myself lucky that I’m still walking about this earth. (So will try harder to remember that!)

    Deb

  67. I love your attitude Carla. We need to find the joy in life where we are. Too much time can be spent looking back or looking forward and then we miss the now.

    I will be turning 53 a few days after your birthday. I have never been bothered by my age but I must say I don’t love some of the things that have changed in my body in the last decade. Arthritis, bursitis and things I don’t have control over. But as my doctor pointed out to me, because of my healthy lifestyle which includes healthy food and exercise all of these things are less severe and can be managed. The thought of that makes me smile.

  70. Great, thoughtful post. Thanks for sharing! I love celebrating birthdays, my own included! My mother and I give each other a birthday week filled with kind words, and little surprises – even though we live across the country from one another.

  71. Love this Carla. And I need to follow your lead and embrace an upcoming birthday. Mine is a ways away, but it’s a biggie, and it’s making me very “reflective”. I know there is NOTHING I can do about it, and I’m happy getting older…but sometimes I just don’t think I’m where I thought I’d be at this age, and I wonder how things got a bit off track. That said, I’m grateful like you, and hope to age for a long time to come. Have a wonderful day!!!

  73. Seriously, could you be anymore “on” with your posts? I guess that’s why you’re one of the best!

    I hope that I continue to respect and honor my body. I to look and feel my best for as long as I possibly can!

  75. As I get ready to turn 50 I have been contemplating much of the same. I’ve gone through a gamut of emotions but in the end I know that how I feel on the inside (emotionally and physically) really is what counts.

    Also? Any age can look older or younger depending on a lot of factors…

  77. I gazed at your navel and (after being distracted by the zensah bra–love!) realized my half birthday (careening toward the half century mark) was 2 days ago. I adore your attitude toward this whole aging thing. Adore it!

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