What are we giving ourselves this year?

by

rsz_gift_cert_1-1

 

Ahhhh.

If you live in the USA you may still be feeling the, uh, repercussions of the Great Thanksgiving Stress-Out.

Family, travel,  food, schedules thrown off, routine replaced by mayhem.

No matter where you reside or what you celebrate we’re all thisclose to being knee-deep in holiday frenzy.

  • I’ve revealed I’m over the Let’s Make This a HEALTHY HOLIDAY!!! musings.

The thing is these were all generalities.

Vague What *I* do to stave off holiday stress musings in hopes they’d spark personal insights for you.

Today I’m about the concrete.

We’re about the concrete (yes–dragging you in. I rock at asking for help that way.).

About building a long & creative list of specific actions we can take to make these next 3 weeks as smooth as we can.

A list this misfit Jew can steal, print, hang on my fridge & use as a “go to” when at a loss for ways to lighten my holiday load.

A list to make our Holiday Season 2014 frazzle-free and PRESENT so we can cruise into New Years as our best & most healthy selves.

I’ll start us off.

Hanukkah begins in two weeks (!)

And, a result of my being as busy as a COUGAR Hanukkah Harry, I just figured that out last night.

And, as a result of my deciding to love myself where I am right now, I made a decision.

I bestowed upon myself the gift certificate pictured above.

I immediately acknowledged how *crazy* attempting to write/send holiday cards, buy gifts for friends/relatives near & far, decorating the domicile etc. would all make me with a looming move date of 12.20.14.

I immediately acknowledged how many things need to be done this holiday season (packing, organizing child for a new school, packing) *but* none of the list above have to be.

I immediately gave myself the gift(certificate) of time.

It’s not an exaggeration to say, after releasing myself from those obligations, I felt as though I could b-r-e-a-t-h-e again.

I felt so *ENERGIZED* by the sweet, sweet gift of freedom I started us–the royal social media friends US— a list of stuffs we could gift ourselves these next few weeks.

Four treats we could bestow upon ourselves which would make this holiday season feel (if you’re like I am) MORE merry & bright.

(Four ideas which work for me—and I await your #5.)

  1. Never say YES when your heart & head screams NO.
  2. If you have a work-vacation don’t use *all* the time for others—dedicate some to self-care.
  3. (should you be a weigh’er) Bestow upon yourself a break from the scale. Don’t obsess about a HEALTHY HOLIDAY!
  4. No! More! MUSTurbation. Do what you can when you can.  Shed the shoulds & oughts.
  5. Please to hit us all up with your number five below…

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Comments

  3. In a very weird way since this is yet another year of being far away from all the craziness that comes with a holiday around family, I miss some of the musts. I miss the bustle and excitement of scrubbing down the house and cooking because a group of people I love are coming over.

    That being said, I am sublimely happy to have seen more Hallmark movies than most kids already this year…love me some Christmas cheer 🙂

  7. Those are all great! I absolutely REFUSE to get stressed out during the holidays. Crazy busy? Sure, but never ever ever stressed out. I always remind myself what the holiday season is about: enjoying time with family and friends, and being thankful for all that we have. Stress isn’t supposed to be a part of it, so if I start feeling super frazzled, I just back right off or reassign the task at hand to someone else in the family. I truly think this is a result of growing up watching my loving mother nearly drive herself into the grave every Christmas season with so much unnecessary stress!

  11. All those, yes.

    And:

    If working out is your stress release, remind yourself it’s your gif to yourself, not just one more thing on the to do list to stress out about fitting in.

  13. My new stress buster is to sit on my sofa in my pj’s and order everything on line, gift wrapped, while drinking wine or hot chocolate. I usually get a massage after because my neck gets a little stiff and I did save so much money.

  14. All of yours plus breaking from tradition for tradition’s sake. Last year’s traveling Xmas made us realize that we don’t need the type of Xmas we grew up with.

    Traveling allows us to let go of all the weeks of holiday prep work and just enjoy the day.

  15. It’s been a work in progress but I’m learning to say more no’s than yes. When someone ask if I can do something or go somewhere and I don’t want to, I now say, I sure wish I could but I’m very sorry I can’t. And say nothing more!

  16. I’m with Tamara. This year my tribe of five are avoiding the in-law drama and spending Christmas Eve doing fun activities (ice skating, Light-seeing, pizza eating) instead of the “traditional” opening of presents. None of us were happy with the way Christmas Eve has panned out in the last few years, so we are giving ourselves the gift of fun and freedom to do whatever the heck we want. I want my kids to have fond memories of Christmas Eve, not memories of hurt feelings and frustration.

  17. I will take a Meditative deep breath every time I walk through a doorway. (This might mean going into the bathroom when I don’t have to!)

  19. If you have pets that destroy decorations, give yourself permission to not put up any. Instead, use the time and energy to be with family, and go visit friends and relatives who do decorate.

    Also, weird gifts count. Yesterday, i got one of the young men who lives with us the gift of an eye exam, his first in 3 years. No need to wrap, and he probably won’t have a gift to open on the big day, but he’s happier with this and he needed it. Feel free to celebrate and give your way.

  20. This year, I am taking a hard look at my relationships with my family. While my family is not full of drama or fights, there are usually one or two tiffs that bring us into a tense situation. I am taking a class right now for my masters program and one of the topics that we have covered this year is conflict resolution. This topic is especially important because relationships can be so fragile, and knowing how to work with others and get along even when it is difficult is one of the best skills a person can have. There are five conflict management techniques and all of them have pros and cons.
    1. Avoidance: this is best to give people time to calm down and think about the situation, but it can also lead to a problem not getting solved
    2. Accommodating: this is good because it can help build relationships stronger by letting others do what they feel is best. On the other hand, a person may feel as though they are being taken advantage of if they are always letting others have their way.
    3. Compromising: This method is great because every one wins! But it can get a bit hairy because some may feel as though everyone loses.
    4. Collaborating: Two head are better than 1! But 84 brains can get overwhelming.
    5. Competing: Probably not the best method for dealing with family, but it does solve a problem quickly.

    I think this holiday season, I am going to work on these methods to ensure that my time spent with family is quality time, and not an experience that I dread.

  22. Love the gift card! My #5 is that it’s okay to be selfish! My husband and I are going on a trip just the two of us for christmas. The family isn’t thrilled but it’s not about them. And I’m good with that.

  23. Love this – gotta work on #1 a lot!!!
    My #5 would be to give/share experiences instead of gifts – if I could only get my boys on board!

  25. YES to it all & #1!!!!!!

    I am all about doing what is right for me – yup – that is healthy living.

    I am thankful Hanukkah did not start in November or even right at the beginning of December this year!

  26. I don’t feel like my ‘musts’ are under my control. Seemingly, all my in-laws have birthdays in the holiday season, both my father-in-law and mother are dealing with injuries… so a lot of the tedious ‘musts’ are actually protected by the law of ‘family first’.

    Ignoring some of my other musts could lead to me being out-of-work, which actually sounds appealing in the short term.

  28. Oh my gosh yes to #1!! That is my number one goal for all of next year. My #5 is embrace imperfection and enter into a no-comparison zone – no comparing and worrying about who’s done more decorating, cookie baking, hosting the perfect event, etc. One of my mantra’s this season is “Life is not a Norman Rockwell picture!”

  30. I had something to do every single day of my Thanksgiving break… primary care doctor appointment, eye doc appt, dentist, etc. Plus cleaning the whole house, writing Christmas cards, etc. Each and every day was planned out from beginning until end – so over Christmas break I am going to take one day to PLAN NOTHING. I will not write a single thing in my planner for that day, I will not force myself to do anything, I will do what I want and what I feel and I will not feel guilty about it (that is the hardest part for me).

  31. OH GIRL! love. i’m giving myself the gift of BEING HAPPY! and recognizing what a good mom, daughter, sister, friend i am. because i know i am. so there! 😉 xo

  32. I love all the holiday preparations and celebrations….my cards (home made) are pretty much mailed (42 in the mail…about ten to go). My gifts have been purchased year round so I am not rushing around at the last min. to buy. They just need to be wrapped and shipped…which is happening this weekend. The tree will go up on my daughter’s b’day (the 18th) just like every year. The activities for my preschoolers are planned and I have already started my progress reports (40 of them to do!) so that I am not stressed to get them all done those last days of work before break. My workouts are complete by 5:30 a.m. so they are out of the way! The meals for the week are prepared on Sundays so that I only have to compliment with a salad or side when I get home from work. I am giving myself a wheelbarrow for Christmas so that I can do more gardening over the holidays….LOVE this time of year! Not stressful at all if you pace yourself and get organized!

  33. #5 Doing what’s right for YOU! There’s a bit of family drama this year {understatement of the year}, so Gary & I are removing ourselves from the situation. Not easy to do, but I need to do what is right for me {and Gary}.

  37. I’m giving myself the exact same certificate this year. I have basically decided to ignore Christmas this year. I go every year to get my niece for a week so I spend Christmas and New Years Day driving for 12 hours. My new grandbabies aren’t home yet. We are having KFC on Christmas Eve. We are taking mom to her sisters for a week and I am going to epend the week with my 13 year old niece and do NOTHING! A week long pj party.

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