My search for hygge.

by

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hygge uses candles to bring light to the dark.

Ive fallen in love with a word.

Unlike falling in love with a person I have no recollection the first time we “met.”  The idea, sense and awkward pronunciation, however, has remained with me.

Hygge.

The term comes from a Norwegian word meaning “well-being” (the Danes began using it in the late 18th century) and is pronounced hue-gah.

The unique thing about hygge is, even in Norwegian, it doesn’t really have clear definition as it’s more a feeling than an act.

It also doesn’t have an English translation better than the general art of building sanctuary and community.

Hygge.

I’ve long been fascinated by the fact Danes are some of the happiest people on earth despite loooong, dark winters (during the shortest days they see only 6 hours of sunlight).

Our shortest winter days in Texas are nothing close to that– yet I still dread the annual lack of sun.

Unlike writer-friends who welcome early nightfall and seize it as a sign to cocoon indoors—darker afternoons depress me.

I’ve dreaded this year’s falling back on 11.1 pretty much since we ‘fell’ last year.

Hygge takes on greater importance to the Danes during the winter.

This Texan, in preparation for the dark, El Nino winter ahead, has decided to join them and search for/create hygge in Austin.

austin winter weather'

Screenshot of last winter’s weather forecast.

For me hygge symbolizes the ultimate act of prioritizing self-care.

Indulging through connection with others and  through ritual.

Hygge is not punishing or denying ourselves (hence the happiest people on earth creating it?) in the name of self-improvement.

(I’ve read Danes rarely binge/purge or yo-yo diet. Given this life-approach that would make sense.)

Hygge.

I’ve created a definition of hygge for myself.

For me it will center around making time to relax (alone and with others. hygge works both ways) and creating a warm atmosphere in my home (which still feels like a house) so all who live here/visit feel rooted and connected.

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hygee can be a long, soothing bath…with or without friends.

For me hygge seems mental. An attitude.

“Things” are often involved (snuggly sweaters to winter darkness fighting candles) yet the emphasis is on the feeling and connecting.

For me hygge seems behavior based.

It makes sense hygge leads to happiness as it simultaneously emphasizes how we act toward others and how lovingly we treat ourselves.

For me hygge seems to be creating intimacy with those you’d only be loosely connected to otherwise.

Hygge is like hosting a constant crappy dinner and carefully choosing who you’d want to attend?

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and always more hygee candles…

For me hygge seems slow.

The longer I’ve explored hygge as approach to life the more it appears hygge cannot be rushed.

Period.

Are Danes less busy than we Americans?  I say no.  I’d contend they just choose their priorities.

For me hygge seems social.  Unless it’s not.

As I dug more deeply into the word and its practice I found a growing gap between old school practitioners and the newer generation.

Hygge used to necessitate being with people (social support is key for overall happiness!) yet for the Danes this has shifted.

Younger Danes have mad it now OK to hygge solo.

Hygge for me is reading at night while snuggled in a fleece blanket.

Hygge for me is a long walk–with only the Doodle for company–just as dusk is coming.

Hygge for me is the feeling I get when family members gather around a too tiny table for laughter and connection.

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hygee can be silly.

I guess, for this WannaBeDaneTexan, hygge is defined  as the art of creating intimacy through (seemingly) small everyday acts.

It’s an overall feeling of pleasure and being present whether alone or with others.

And you?

  • Had you heard of hygge before?
  • What would hygge look like for you?

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Comments

  1. I’ve never heard of this word before, but I love having dinner parties in the winter with friends.
    I’d only add candles.

  2. I love that there are words out there that don’t have a true meaning. It makes you think and interpret it how you will. Why does everything have to be defined? I’ve never heard of it but I think Hygge is all about finding a place of comfort and happiness. That’s wide open!

  3. I have never heard the word, yet I have definitely struggled to find the illusiveness of what is means. I’m already thinking of how to bring more light to the fast approaching winter!

  4. It’s my first time hearing about this word. And I must admit, my self-love practice needs some improvement. Staying at home left me with some habits I didn’t have when I had to show up at the office every day.
    Lovely word. I need to add it to my inspirational board.

  5. I think there’s a book about an American who tried to live like a Dane for a year and find her happy?
    I’ll see if I can find the title

  6. I have never heard of this word, but I love it. I love fall with the darker afternoons and I love fall back with the light going back to earlier sunrises. I love snuggling in my chair in the early morning dark with my book, or computer and my cup of coffee. I think I learned the art of hygge early in life, with quiet evenings with the family playing games of cards, or reading books by the fireplace. Love the word and its meaning

  7. I think this is why the Danes are so happy and why we Americans are not.
    Connection and community is prioritized there.

  8. I love learning about words in other languages that are singular and to the point for them but translate to phrases or feelings for us. English has one of the most extensive vocabularies in the world — particularly when it comes to slang — but it is still such a limited language. Other cultures have multiple words for “love” yet we do not. We did coin Afro and bootilicious, though…

  9. Love this! I like your take on it, too.

    I haven’t heard of it before but for me I expect it would be BEING PRESENT – and figuring out what I need in the moment, and doing that. Prioritizing ourselves is so important.

  10. you always teach us something new! and i love this concept! I totally pronounced it your way first too. But now, I must find my Hygge ways. Pondering.. self care.

  11. I have never heard of the word hygge before but given that it’s already snowing here and our long winter is about to set in earlier than usual, I could use some self care rituals to keep me cheery and chipper!

  13. I love that you not only make us think, but teach us new words and ways to express how we’re feeling. I love being around people and LOVE my solitude, but I’m realizing that the need for a community (in person, not just my online lovers) is growing stronger each year.

  16. I read up on this last year and it is such a perfect concept, I think. As much as I fight cold weather, on a lower down level of consciousness, I find I actually embrace it. I see myself slowing (to the extent that a mother of two on-the-go-children can slow) and seeking out easier, quieter, more inside endeavors. It would seem we all need a little Danish heritage, no?

  19. What a great word! I love the long nights of winter. The dark is where I find comfort and peace in my own little world after everyone has gone to bed. It is just me, my thoughts, and my laptop. I cherish that time like none other.

  20. I’ve never heard of this word before, but I love the idea of creating sanctuary and community, particularly with the “dark time” fast approaching.
    We just moved north (Central Ontario, Canada), and I admit that I’m feeling somewhat unnerved. How dark will it get? How much snow? Will we be able to get out and see people? Being new here, I’m already missing human contact on my shaky days … what will winter be like.
    Perhaps I should post a Hygge event on the bulletin board in town. 🙂

  22. Yes, I learned about hygge when I was in Denmark many years ago. It is about intimacy and cosiness… I think of it is ‘cocooning’ in a way.

    Danish is a very odd sounding language to my Canadian ears and I recall it being said something like HOOOOga.

    Hope you find lots!

  23. Nope- but I think I live it. I love just hanging with my adult daughter as we work on a sewing/craft project. I love hiking with my extended family. I love walking to the pool, getting into a mantra-flow state and walking home while the sun is just coming up. I am happy for the earlier sunsets as I go to bed early so I can get up at 4 to get in my “me” time and be at work by 7. And I hope it rains every single day this winter!

  24. I’ve never heard of “hygge”! Cool meaning, though, even though it could mean something slightly different for everyone.
    Are we kind of/sort of on the same wavelength today? I touched briefly on feeling connected in today’s post 🙂
    Happy Monday!!

  25. Love this new word {and concept}. I will interpret hygge as self-care for my SOUL. Taking the time to read before bed because it calms me down or drinking a cup of that bone broth I made this weekend because I know that besides being healthy, I feel it nourishing my soul as well.

  28. I never heard the word before. I like it. I do hate to see the shorter days and longer nights. I have to rouse myself to get up and slap myself around to stay up. Not enough hours in the day is what I feel in November and December just because of the shortened day light.

  29. I am a summer/daylight person through and through, but I finally found my “hygge” last year during the winter with running. Most winters I’d just stay inside and miss out on (what little there is) vitamin D and being in nature. Running is a great excuse for me to get outside and stay warm. I’m planning to do the same thing this winter and hopefully it’s just as awesome!

  30. I have never heard the word hygge before, but I love it and I love how you’ve chosen to define it. As someone who used to DREAD winter and connected it to severe anxiety (to the point that I thought I’d never leave my house again), and then became someone who chose not to hate winter, I am moving more towards a hygge-ified relationship with winter. And I like it!

  31. This is something I needed today. (I don’t know why, but you and I always seem like our paths cross right at the exact time I need it). Self-care is something I have been working on prioritizing this year – and stepping back was what I needed earlier this year, and now I am ready to prioritize me again.

  32. Very nice.

    For me, the feeling of well being – or self care – comes down to satisfying as many senses as possible at once. It may be why the winter months with darker, shorter days are among my favorite: so many soft fabrics, the smell and look of a fire, the taste of a stew, the sight of my home’s cozy interior against the backdrop of bleak outside. In the summer, there are others, but either way, for me the comfort comes through those things we treat or expose our senses to.

  34. Tempted to ask my Danish clients about this, but I think they’re on vacation – maybe that’s one way they do this!

  35. I’ve never heard this and the whole time I was reading it I said it in my head the way you said we’re not supposed to.

    I love the concept, though. Very beautiful.

  36. Very interesting, I have never heard of hygge before but will be looking into it more for sure! It reminds me of a book I read earlier this year and was just thinking about, Body Peace. Thanks for sharing.

  37. I have actually heard the word and love it. I too search for hygge during the long winter months in New Hampshire. It has already gotten endlessly dark. I must find ways to keep my well-being during this time of darkness.

  38. I’ve never heard of the word, but love it’s unofficial meaning. My brain pronounces it completely different, sounding like High-Ge.

    I think it’s beautiful and I need to find my hygge..

  39. I use to LOVE the time change – back when I was a student and later when I was a stay at home mom. Nothing more wonderful than being in the kitchen with the lights warming the windows and dinner on the stove when everyone comes home at dusk. Now – I work 10/12 hour shifts so the time change means leaving home in the dark and arriving home in the dark, even though my husband beats me home and has the lights on. (He could use some work with the whole dinner on the stove thing.) The concept of hygge is wonderful and something I feel I could really get behind. In fact, it is something most people probably need and don’t realize! Thanks for such great food for thought.

  40. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of “hygge,” and yet I’m seemingly ALWAYS on a new search for “it.” Your posts always have a way of reaching me when I need it. I’ve been in a rut lately (hello anxiety!) and I really need to chill, make time to relax and reinventory all of the little (& big) wonderful things in my life. (Oh, and even in AL where we have a good amount of sunlight, I am 100% with you on DREADING the “fall back.” I need my sunshine.)
    Anyway, here’s to discovering “hygge”…

  41. I HAVE heard of hygge (through YOU?)

    “…hygge seems social. unless it’s not.” – my hygge includes those baths – alone. my alone time to recharge allows me to be more social otherwise. win win.

  42. Thank you for this wonderful article. I’ve also been interested in hygge for some time now, you bring up some excellent points on the importance of self care.

  44. Ive had a few people ask me about that. I did see a few places in my research hygge was originally a Norwegian word for “well-being” and first appeared in Danish near the end of the 18th century. I wonder, now, if that’s true?

  45. HYGGE. Never heard of it before. Good to learn about it from you here.

    For me, I always try to find my own sanctuary.

    So far, I know it’s the time I went to the sea. Sitting there and watch the waves.

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