- New city.
- New neighborhood.
- New school.
Whole new batch of people in my life who have no idea I let it ALL HANG OUT online—the good and the bad— in a distinctly OVER SHARE fashion.
Ive been careful to r-e-m-o-v-e my email signature (blog, twitter, facebook, instagram, you tube, book) from messages I’ve sent to the Tornado’s school & my new “friends.”
A few reasons including the fact the first thing they need to “see” about me is NOT a video of my yammers whilst wearing a sports bra.
I never thought to do this when she started kindergarten.
It wasnt a big deal—Id only be reminded moms in her class read MizFit when they’d ask me a fitness question—yet sometimes it felt…wonky.
They knew my innermost frazzlings—-and I barely knew them at all.
It’s NOT that I long to hide anything.
The pseudonyms I use (Tornado for my daughter and Ren(aissance) man for my husband) were born more out of silliness than being secretive & mainly originated from my old, mama-blog.
Because, unfortunately, so much of our lives— blogger or not—-is out there if people really want to DIG.
As a result, I approach blogging the way I write fiction:
The more perfectly you capture someone with your words the less likely they are to see themselves in your work.
Yet all *that* said: I entertained the notion of reigning it in a tad until we were perfectly & completely settled.
A CLEANSE of sorts—but of the words variety.
Then I reminded myself of the premise of this blog: a play on the word MISFIT (and not Miss. Fit).
Im transparent.
I have no filter.
This is my place to get healthy & stay healthy.Β MIND & BODY.
I let it all.hang.out.
The OAKLANDgood & the OAKLANDbad and *all* my failings as a person who’s just trying to live the best life she can.
Which brings me in my wandering, circuitous way back to you.
- Is your blog hidden from family/offline-friends?
- What subjectΒ (broad or specific) would you blog about if you possessed complete anonymity?
- What are the titles of YOUR blog posts we will never read?
please to consider this your ‘heads up warning’ there will, indeed, be a post coming titled: I SHED A TEAR WHEN I RECEIVED THE HEAD LICE LETTER once I tease-out the fitness/healthy living tie-in. thank you.
Lindsay @ The Lean Green Bean says
January 17, 2013 at 4:20 ammine isn’t hidden…but definitely not everyone i know IRL knows about it. I always kinda feel like the blog world is this separate little world and when someone IRL says they read my blog I get a little freaked out…but i’m slowly starting to get used to it!
Charlotte says
January 17, 2013 at 4:42 amThere are still times when someone I know “irl” makes a comment about my blog and I get a little uncomfortable. Why? Beats me. I hide nothing. I over share on my
Blog and to my friends.. I would love to do a sex and the city type blog if I had complete anonymity. Or an opinions blog. I love a good debate π
Cammy@TippyToeDiet says
January 17, 2013 at 5:15 amThanks to a couple of media mentions, my real name and blog name are out there, so I couldn’t be hidden if I wanted. That said, I don’t go passing out the URL at the family reunion.
Shelley B says
January 17, 2013 at 5:38 amI keep my blog separate from my real life to a degree – I don’t have a FB page for it nor do I mention it there. God forbid my IRL friends read it! (sort of being sarcastic, but sort of true). It’s a little disconcerting to put yourself out there in writing and have a friend talk about what you wrote to your face. I need the distance of written words, people!
AmyC says
January 17, 2013 at 5:49 amI’m in the same place as Lindsay – I like talking about it to some of my runner friends…but for some reason not everyone.
Maybe I’m afraid they are judging me?
Izzy says
January 17, 2013 at 6:25 amI’d be afraid of that, too, I think.
Dare You To says
January 17, 2013 at 5:52 amMine’s not particularly hidden; my friends and family all know about it. However, I don’t advertise it to coworkers for professional reasons. Not that there’s anything wrong with sharing the healthy living lifestyle, but professionally it’s better that I not cross the line with my online sharing. I keep my blog honest and ME without sharing too many details about my personal life or my family’s. It is the internet, after all!
That being said, I’m still new to the Real World, so I’m being cautious. I LOVELOVELOVE that you let it all hang out.
Healthy Mama says
January 17, 2013 at 6:01 amNO WAY.
Mine is hidden π
Kat says
January 17, 2013 at 6:03 amMy blog isn’t hidden, but I’m sure ill never talk about certain things….internets never go away π
Andrea says
January 17, 2013 at 6:09 amI think that in general I’m the kind of person who wants to just ‘let it all hang out’ and then I have to remember the fact that this is the internet and there may be people with whom I don’t want to share everything! I always forget!! I think I would rather be 100% transparent, but I don’t want my blog (and my crazy inner thoughts) to get me into trouble… so I have to reign it in. It’s a learning process π
Barbara says
January 17, 2013 at 6:14 amMy blog is out there. Read by my mother, my friends, my (haven’t seen you since middle school) Facebook friends, and probably 1 or 2 of my church pastors.
What I don’t say on my blog? A lot. π
Still, what I do say is me. Filtered but still real.
Michele @ Nycrunningmama says
January 17, 2013 at 6:17 amThis is SUCH a thought-provoking post! I’m interested to see what others say about it.
I blog about *some* things about my kids. I don’t mention their names all too often (usually just refer to them as #1 or #2 or older/younger son) but I do put pictures and other things about them. I do it on FB and instagram so why wouldn’t i put it on my blog…you know?
My friends/family know about my blog. i don’t know how much they read it since most are not runners. HA =)
Coco says
January 17, 2013 at 6:23 amOnly two “every day” friends know about my blog. No one at work does. At this point I don’t know when/how to tell people. They already think I’m crazy for the work I do for my law blog. But, i do try to blog with the knowledge that anyone could find it at any time — so i try to limit the sports bra pics!
P.S. I have a client working on a head lice product but it’s still with the FDA so I can’t hook you up with samples for a review. :-0
Izzy says
January 17, 2013 at 6:24 amWhy do I love the notion of your new neighbors having no idea you’re MizFit!!!!!
Anne says
January 17, 2013 at 12:32 pmMe too.
Satu says
January 17, 2013 at 6:44 amThe public/private thing is interesting. What do you really reveal of yourself if you are in your sports bra on your blog?
I don’t think it’s as much as I or you might think.
My family and my closest friends know abut my blogs (I have a Finnish fitness blog too) but not everyone does. On the other hand, I use my grandmother’s maiden name as my pen name. My “real” last name is reserved to my professional self.
I wouldn’t be really happy if someone googled my publications and found my before/after pictues. π
I think I would write more revealing posts if I was completely anonymous – I could freely let all the skeletons out of my closet! π
Heda says
January 17, 2013 at 6:53 amI completely agree with you, Miz.
I am mainly a writer of fiction and find when I utilize people in my life for characters and capture them precisely they do not see themselves at all.
Linz @ Itz Linz says
January 17, 2013 at 6:59 ami hid my blog from my family and friends for the first couple of weeks. but really it was more of a i want to see if i can really do this and stick with it kind of thing than a privacy thing… once i knew this is what i loved, i was happy to share. i def don’t go around announcing it, but share it the opportunity presents itself π
Christine @ Love, Life, Surf says
January 17, 2013 at 7:00 amI would be really sad if you “cleansed” your blog because you are you and your no-filter, mizfit voice has so much good stuff to say. The public/private thing is tricky. I didn’t really hide it per se but I don’t actively talk about it with my family or friends around the neighborhood although they do know I write it (maybe except my mother and it’s probably better that way). But it is weird when someone references something that I wrote – kind of jarring sometimes.
Katie @ Talk Less, Say More says
January 17, 2013 at 7:00 amMy blog is not “hidden” from friends or family though at times I really want to say something that I probably shouldn’t if they’re going to be reading (HA!) or I rethink certain topics because I’m not sure how my family will take it or see it. That’s hard sometimes and maybe someday I’ll still do those posts but for now, I’m not ready because I’m not sure they are either.
I’m also not one to over publicize my blog with those I meet and it’s something that I go back and forth with. My new chiropractor asked why I hadn’t shared it with him sooner because he really wanted to check it out and share it with our community. I felt silly for not being more vocal about what I do and my passion for healthy living.
Ericka @ The Sweet Life says
January 17, 2013 at 7:02 amAnd THIS “no filter” is why we love you! I am pretty much the same way. I[m proud of my blog and would love for everyone to be reading it. Luckily, my bosses are men and aren’t really into “The Sweet Life”…ha ha but everyone knows about it and it’s a great conversation piece. Sometimes I get more personal than I’d like…the world of possible future employers, etc. reading about but I just say screw it, this is me and I am simply not a private person. I am what I am π
Nellie says
January 17, 2013 at 7:05 amI recently shared my blog with family and friends after being inspired to do so at fitbloggin, at first it was interesting, now its pretty mind blowing how many of my friends and family actually read every post then come back to me with commentary! I don’t put everything out there, im not wired that way but I probably have some friends that feel like they get more out of me on my blog than IRL. Sad but true.
Hanlie says
January 17, 2013 at 7:06 amI recently took my whole blog private and unfriended anyone whom I’ve ever worked with at my current company because my boss felt that as a senior manager it was unseemly for me to share my personal life with the whole wide world. I wasn’t happy at the time, but I must admit that my posts have become much more open since then. I know for instance that no member of my family will stumble upon anything I write and that makes a difference for me.
Runner Girl says
January 17, 2013 at 7:11 amMy blog is super-private.
It is mainly for me as a journal, but I have shared with a few select friends.
I can’t imagine you can hide this place for long.
Sorry Miz π
Rita says
January 17, 2013 at 7:12 amIt’s so weird.
For some reason I imagined you moving and announcing to all your new neighbors: MIZFIT IN DA HOUSE!!!
Miz says
January 17, 2013 at 7:14 amLAUGHED OUT LOUD even just imagining…
Nicki says
January 17, 2013 at 7:13 amMine isn’t hidden. I know, for a fact, my daughter-in-law of 4 1/2 months reads my blog regularly. She also reads my tweets. LOL! I have, though, had to keep some items off my blog. As much as I would like to put certain things out there, some I can’t (school board items that are not appropriate for discussion) and some I am unsure how to approach.
lindsay says
January 17, 2013 at 7:16 ammine isn’t hidden. THey know me and what i voice. But then again, i share but don’t overshare.. well most of the time.
p.s.
I miss you, ATX miss our MISFIT
Kim says
January 17, 2013 at 7:23 amI don’t hide mine – in fact, I wish some of my friends and family would actually read it. Maybe they feel like they shouldn’t. I’m trying to encourage readers – plus no big revelations on mine – just a daily work-out.
MIz says
January 17, 2013 at 7:24 aminteresting perspective, too. the WISHING they’d read…
Brad Gouthro Fitness says
January 17, 2013 at 7:28 amI hide nothing! All of my goodies are out there. No shame!
Trish @I_am_Succeeding says
January 17, 2013 at 7:35 amGreat question!
I share my journey with the world wide web but very few IRL know I blog and I like it that way. I have nothing to hide but seems when friends read they have so many questions and bombard e and I get overwhelmed.
The only one(to my knowledge) in my family that reads it is my daughter. I am ok with that as I really try to be a good role model for her IRL and on the web. =)
Helen DoingA180 says
January 17, 2013 at 7:35 amI started it 100% private – in fact there weren’t even any photos of my fact. Once I got brave enough to post a photo of my face is when I got found by one person. Though it hasn’t spread that much, (I’d say mine is about 90% hidden from IRL people) most of the time I wish it was 100% hidden. I don’t know why other than there are times I’d really like to put in words exactly what I’m feeling on any number of topics and now that I’ve beeen found out I don’t really feel like I can do that. In fact, lately, I’ve been thinking about just shutting down my blog altogether, or going private. Still pondering what to do.
Jody - Fit at 55 says
January 17, 2013 at 7:39 amI am confused – so you hid it from the new people or decided not to.. I never get anything! π
All my friends & family know about my blog… but I don’t write about all my most inner stuff like many other people do. Plenty I still hide away…. just not comfortable with telling family or others…
I guess I may write about some things I truly feel about me & maybe some anger stuff too if all were completely anonymous…. some people don’t like to hear the anger stuff… so.. π
Lots to think about! π
Knowledge is learning something every day.
Wisdom is letting go of something every day.
– Zen Proverb
Got this from Darwinian Fail blog
Kelly @ Cupcake Kelly's says
January 17, 2013 at 7:44 amI wish I’d kept my blog a secret from some family. They get defensive when I write truths about my childhood then proceed to text me for hours. Because of that you’ll never see any real posts about my childhood traumas or the real deep reason why I’m overweight.
Helen DoingA180 says
January 17, 2013 at 7:49 amI just had another thought: You don’t think any of your new neighbors/friends read Ladies Home Journal? Might that not spur some people to ask you about your blog?
EmergeFit says
January 17, 2013 at 8:01 amOut. There.
Heather (Where's the Beach) says
January 17, 2013 at 8:01 amI sort of wish mine was hidden from my boss and co-workers, so sometimes I do have to filter what I say. But I never hid it from family or friends. I kind of like it when a friend comments!
Carrie@familyfitnessfood.com says
January 17, 2013 at 8:03 amOMG, my daughter had head lice TWICE during 2nd grade. Five years later, I still cringe when I hear people talk about it. It was such a pain in my butt.
OK, back to the point…. my blog isn’t hidden. Most of my IRL friends don’t read it, but there are a few who do. My husband doesn’t read it because he says he lives it. My In-laws do read it every day and that’s kind of a bummer to me. So many of the things I’d love to talk about are triggered by their unhealthy ways… But, I do keep them in mind when I give healthy habit advice.
I totally get the feeling ‘wonky’ when an IRL person talks about something I blogged about. My FIL does it all the time and it kinds of creeps me out. But, I put it out there, so I have to deal with it.
Most of my IRL friends just don’t ‘get’ blogging. They don’t read blogs or care much to read mine.
Bari says
January 17, 2013 at 8:03 amMy blog isn’t hidden, but sometimes I worry about my coworkers or parents of my students finding it since it autoposts to FB and I’m FB friends with some of them. Like yesterday’s and today’s posts where I posted my weight. Or I drop a ton of f-bombs. It’s out there. I’m reminded of that when I get a call from my Dad about the language I used in a post π
I’ve had some crazy stalker but not usually on my blog – those show up on DailyMile or Twitter and get blocked quickly.
Ashley Morton says
January 17, 2013 at 8:07 amMy friends and family know that I have a blog, but don’t know the exact link. There are people at my internship who know that I have one, but again, don’t know the exact link. Due to the nature of my internship it is best to remain anonymous-ish because clients get curious and want to know all about my life. I think that if I had complete anonymity, I would choose to write about my struggles with my weight and depression which lead me to become healthy.
Fab Kate says
January 17, 2013 at 8:10 amI have multiple blogs now. Mostly because some of what I blog about, some of the people I know really don’t care so much about. I used to have two: my blog that dealt with my health/fitness/weight loss issues and the things in my life that effected that, and one for everything else. My “everything else blog” was recently split into two blogs, one for my travels, science, and conservation interests, the other for politics, religion and current events.
The split of my other blog had a lot to do with my identity… or secrets if you want to call it that. I talk a lot about my experiences in poverty, and raising kids with disabilities, and how national policy plays into that, so I’m often posting things that are controversial. Sometimes those controversial posts are syndicated. I do it because I believe things need to be said to society at large. I don’t particularly want to share this as a PERSONAL story to casual acquaintances.
My other blog, my travel and conservation blog, I simply now blog under my whole, real name.
Keeping multiple blogs isn’t just about identity, though. I have a number of readers on my health and fitness blog who read for the weigh ins, and really don’t care whether or not I saw or heard pika on my last hike, or how to spin wool with a traditional malacate. At the same time, I don’t want to get sidetracked on my blog with comments about my political or religious views when it’s my place to go for fitness accountability and support.
I’ve also started an “online gratitude jar” where I post, every day, one single thing I was grateful for that day. It’s more a way for me to keep positive and focused on the good things than a blog, but it is public.
Miz says
January 17, 2013 at 8:12 amWAIT. How have I missed your online jar?!
off to look:-)
yer outed.
misszippy1 says
January 17, 2013 at 8:12 amWhen I first started my blog, I was pretty quiet about it. Then I decided that if I wanted to grow it, I needed to be loud, so I added the tag lines to my emails and let ’em rip. If I were to start over in a new city, I think I’d go with it being out in the open, simply b/c it has become such a big part of my life. Interesting topic!
Miz says
January 17, 2013 at 8:13 amMore than anything I wanted to preserve (initially) the ability to say I HAAATE THE COLD!!! I MISS AUSTIN. IM SOOO OUTTA HERE WHEN THE CHILD GRADUATES FROM HIGH SCHOOL! THE ROADS ARE TOO TINY! THE TRASH IS SO CONFUSING!! WAAAAH I MISS WEARING SHORTS ALL THE TIME!! but then I realized I still can.
ON MY BLOG.
I dont greet new friends or strangers with inappropriate bursts of the above & it’s ok to online rant even if they’re reading.
Which they arent.
yet π
deb roby says
January 17, 2013 at 10:05 amIf your trash is like mine (and most are), it’s trash every week, recycling and green recycling alternating weeks. Is it not that simple?
MizFit says
January 17, 2013 at 10:12 amoh there are no words for how different it is here.
trash
composting
recycling (two kinds. two bins)
TIIIINY BINS.
anything excess has to be lovingly bound with TWINE and placed with your blessing on the sidewalk…
Denise says
January 18, 2013 at 8:23 amWelcome to California – we recycle everything and in the most complicated way possible so that it’s HARD to do the right thing. (I’m native and I know we’re crazy!)
Sarah Kay Hoffman says
January 17, 2013 at 8:42 amAwesome post! One title you would never see from me is, “WIAW.” I wil never do one of them, and you reminded me that I need to finish that post on why:) xo
Mollie says
January 17, 2013 at 8:46 amWhat is that thing you’re flashing???
Miz says
January 17, 2013 at 8:51 amit’s my secret superhero HYPERWEAR weight vest π
http://www.hyperwear.com
Tamara says
January 17, 2013 at 8:46 amWhile I don’t broadcast my blog URL loudly to friends and family, I don’t hide it either. I’ve found that most aren’t really interested in reading what I have to say (and I’m find with that!).
Lately I’ve been wanting to write about frustrations re: marriage, division of labour/power, mama giving up much to raise children etc. but my blog is not the right place to voice those less than positive thoughts. (for that, I’ve turned to guest posts on a friend’s blog, but not publicized it π )
Other posts I’m not really interested in writing? WIAW and outfit of the day!
Miz says
January 17, 2013 at 8:49 amthats so much of it here, too.
less the HIDING!HIDING! my life and more it doesnt quite MESH with my chosen niche.
my solution? Im bustin’ out of the niche π
at the seams…
Tamara says
January 17, 2013 at 7:43 pmI’m thinking about a second blog…
(PlightoftheAmbitiousMama.com…)
Heather says
January 17, 2013 at 8:46 amMy blog isn’t hidden at all, I post my links on my personal facebook page! I however don’t share EVERYTHING personal going on in my life. I don’t need a crazy stalker!
Mollie says
January 17, 2013 at 8:47 amIf I blogged my post you’d never see would be “my mother-in-law makes me crazy!”
Geosomin says
January 17, 2013 at 9:06 amThis is why I have an online persona for blogging where I can rant and rave, and my facebook is just regular old me. They are relatively separate, but someone paying attention who knows me both ways via online and FB could put it together if they tried hard enough. I just find I sometimes need blogging anonymity to rant about family or work or whatever I like and not have to defend it or talk to people about it later. Too many family members are online and I find it weird what people will remember. Ever since I posted on FB about a good breakfast I’d made and then literally everyone I ran into that day asked me (and my husband) how it was I realized just how much I both need to think and filter some things and still have an unfiltered outlet. I don’t say anything online I wouldn’t regularly…and go from there. Luckily I don’t have a fitness persona or health blog or anything to promote online…just me. I do have an awesome academic job tho where I need to sort of be a role model, so I try and keep my crazy free time antics separate. So far so good…
Julia says
January 17, 2013 at 9:11 amAs a non-blogger I never considered this.
Fascinating thought process. I will never, ever blog π
Madeline @ Food Fitness and Family says
January 17, 2013 at 9:13 amMy mom has spread my blog like wild-fire among family and friends. I have NO IDEA who all reads it and occasionally get an email from a relative saying they do. That’s my OMG moment. Every so often someone from HS emails me with a question, etc. and that makes me smile. I am a little guarded on what I write online though because I know my grandma is reading π
Gail says
January 17, 2013 at 9:21 amMy blog’s not hidden and my mom reads it regularly – yeesh. I recently got a phone call from her — “Gail, are you OK? I was reading your blog and you sounded so … so desperate.” I then had to explain to her the confessional nature of blogging.
MizFit says
January 17, 2013 at 9:39 amand Ive had the same convo—FLIP SIDE π
“no. Im not all that ok. the blog is merely a snippet of my 24 hours day…”
Kelly@ShapeDaily says
January 17, 2013 at 9:52 amThis is completely understandable. I write articles for a blog and have been resistant to the idea of starting my own health and fitness blog because I’m not as brave as you all who “let it all hang out”. If I did have my own personal blog it would probably mean that I mustered up the confidence to share my (whole) life with the world wide web and so I probably wouldn’t hide it from anyone because what if they stumbled upon it one day anyway? Friends and family may be suspicious, but if you’re keeping it from other mothers at school that makes a whole lot of sense- women can be caddy and judgmental at any age.
deb roby says
January 17, 2013 at 10:03 amOK. I shall have to find my friend’s old posts about head lice that kept her home from work for a week one summer. They are hysterical. And come up with her ideal treatment. (didn’t they have lice in Texas?)
Now to the real questions: I don’t blog a lot of me. I rarely blog the truly negative body hating. I don’t blog much of the health problems. I keep a lot of me hidden.
Even then, I cringe to know that my next door neighbor reads my blog. Those friends who do blog? OK. Those who read a lot of blogs? OK, too. They are part of the community. Those who don’t? Nope. Not having any of it.
Which, I admit, is strange.
Kierston says
January 17, 2013 at 10:06 amCan we go out for coffee and talk? π
MizFit says
January 17, 2013 at 10:10 amFITBLOGGIN!!!!!
Axel says
January 17, 2013 at 10:20 amI don’t think you can or should blog if you expect to compartmentalize the readership. Although I did start off with mine under a pseudonym/handle, the advent of Social Media connectivity (FB and Google+ especially) meant ‘real names’. I still try to protect my kids’ names, though I’m not sure how much I’m really achieving that.
Mrs. Swan says
January 17, 2013 at 10:41 amMy mom and dad read my blog so there is much that I cannot blog about. There are at least two things I would like to if I was anon but that will never happen so I don’t. I do not use my husband or kids names though. Since I dig up info on people at my job I know how easy it is. There is actually a fairly well known running blogger that for shit and giggles I went digging and found her address. I thought about letting her know by email how easy she is to find but then I figured that would be kinda creepy.
Amy says
January 17, 2013 at 11:01 amI started my blog three years ago (!) this week. I actually missed my blogoversary! And it is completely a secret from my family and most of my friends. I think that is because I wanted to be free to write as honestly as I could, and since most of them are discussed, it just felt strange to let them in on it. Three years later, I still haven’t ‘fessed up, which makes it hard now to promote my blog. I don’t ever discuss it on my Facebook or Twitter feed because I’m worried what they’ll all think. I suppose I should get over it. No one ever cares as much as you think they do, right??
MizFit says
January 17, 2013 at 11:03 amNo. they probably dont, do they? More than anything I feared …. preconceived notions perhaps? and then I realized THEY WOULD REALIZE Im not always prancing around in a sportsbra talking fitness, healthy living and tattoos.
or am I? π
Lori says
January 17, 2013 at 11:10 amThere are some things I do not share on the blog. I never say the company I work for and I don’t give out my parent’s names. Some of my family members read my blog. I didn’t give them the address, they just found it accidentally – which shows that even if you don’t tell someone, it will be found π That makes me uncomfortable at times. Why does it not bother me that a complete stranger reads it, but it does when it is someone I know??
There is some stuff I don’t share because they aren’t things I blab about IRL, and I behave on the blog pretty much like I do in IRL.
Titles I want to write, but probably won’t? The occasional “Why Everyone Pisses Me Off Sometimes” would be one LOL!
Sally Chippendale says
January 17, 2013 at 10:22 pmI had to reply to your comment, I feel the same. I couldn’t care less about what strangers think too. But when it comes to those who know me its an anxious feeling. Lol love your what your post will never be, Its why I never mention my in-laws, ever.
Shannon says
January 17, 2013 at 11:11 amJust last night I had a conversation with the youngest Rotten he is 12. He started acting funny about me taking his picture a couple of weeks ago. He brought to my attention that at school some kids googled his name in computer class. It brought up pictures from my blog of him working out. It embarrassed him because he is being teased about his weight already at school. Broke my heart. I never thought this would happen.
I tried removing the photos that pulled up from the posts and they are forever in google.
So the plan going forward is no pictures of him unless he is comfortable with it and from here on out my kids will always be referred to as the Rottens nothing else.
It is hard when you share your life online to know where to draw the line.
Like you said though if someone wants info. they can get it everything is so public and accessible these days. There is a whole lot more good in the world and what comes from sharing our lives on here than bad. I guess its all about finding a happy balance with everyone in the family.
mimi says
January 17, 2013 at 11:31 amNo, my family don’t read my blog. They figure in it, and i want them to be mostly anonymous. If they want to reveal all on a blog of their own it’s their choice.
If i had complete anonymity, i’m not sure how i would use it. Probably not much different from how i am now.
Posts you won’t read — well, some difficulties don’t translate well to my writing style.
Anonymous says
January 17, 2013 at 11:34 amI don’t imagine I will ever share.
:/
Run DMT says
January 17, 2013 at 11:48 amBest of wishes to you in you new home state!
Nope, my blog open for the world to see. Much the real life me, I’m an open book. I do use my kids real names. I avoid mentioning about where I’ll be with my family for fear of stalkers or someone trying to harm my kids. All of the events I blog about happen AFTER we experience them/ Does that make sense?
Doug says
January 17, 2013 at 12:02 pmI remember when I first started blogging a few years ago – I tried to do it a lot towards personal fitness, workout equipment, etc. that I was using at the time to keep myself in shape after surgery. Pretty soon, though, I started realizing that maybe having everyone (and their friends) involved in my personal life was getting a bit much and toned it down a bit. Isn’t it funny, though, how we’ve shifted from personal diaries/journals kept in our homes to public outpouring of our minds? Kind of an interesting little twist of life, to say the least π
Quix says
January 17, 2013 at 12:09 pmBeen thinking about this a lot lately. I started as a “share everything” blog and link nowhere, but then as things changed a bit at work and mentally and with my life and while I share just about everything related to my racing, eating, body composition journey, etc, there are some things I just don’t feel comfortable talking about. Also, I only link my blog on twitter since I don’t have a gaggle of work people there. Plus, I’ve probably said some potentially conversation inducing things about people I know there. Also, also, I don’t hold back on the language.
Zliten and I are working on a new online space together now that we want to share with the world, and I’m debating whether I want to maintain that “safe to snark and be meeee” space or whether I’m just going to be ok being a little more censored. It will be an interesting year!
Roz@weightingfor50 says
January 17, 2013 at 12:31 pmMOST of my family and non-workfriends know about my blog. I have chosen not to share with a couple who I think would be snarky, though somehow I’m sure it gets back to them and and you said, they can dig if they want to. I only tell a couple of my colleagues at work about it, I think its pretty important to separate work and “other than work” life. Blog titles you’ll never see from me? “What a lovely rash” “steamy weekend with Anderson Cooper” “Given up coffee – am a bitch”, “home vasectomy kit from Amazon” and “Fun with chin hair”. Clearly, I’m far too childish for too much self censoring today, but joking aside, there are some personal details in everyone’s lives that don’t need to go on a blog! Sometimes I cringe at the overshares, but thats just me. Hugs Miz!
Erin @ Girl Gone Veggie says
January 17, 2013 at 1:15 pmMy stepmom and future mother-in-law read my blog, while it’s weird to think about them knowing all the stuff I blog about I don’t think I blog about anything seriously wild or crazy.
Clare @ Fitting It All In says
January 17, 2013 at 1:29 pmI reveal a lot, but maintain some privacy for my safety. But plenty in my life think I reveal too much! I feel that I’m doings this proudly, so I’m not ashamed. But there are certainly people I don’t tell on the first (or fifth) meeting!
Jasmine says
January 17, 2013 at 1:58 pmNOBODY IRL (other than blogger friends that I have actually met IRL) knows that I write a blog.
It is my private outlet. I know that I WOULD hold back if my blog were to become just another of my usual life dealings.
Maybe it’s not fair. Maybe it’s dishonest in some way. I have wrestled with that a bit at one time. Honestly though, this is for me- to grow, to learn, to be able to express myself completely.
I would like to think that if people did see themselves on my blog then they might not be too upset, but who knows??? I don’t share things on my blog that I wouldn’t talk to the people I write about, but most people can clearly see that my blog is pretty much ego-centric. It really is all about me and how I relate to the world. Also- so much about my hopes, dreams, goals.
Nothing is specifically off limits at my blog. There ARE certainly things I have chosen not to share. Sometimes I just don’t want to be a downer- that’s mostly where I hold back.
Kristen says
January 17, 2013 at 2:22 pmI love this post! I kept my blog hidden from family and friends for the first few months of it’s existence, but then I started to be more open about sharing it with them. I feel like I have to filter myself a little because they read it though which bothers me. Maybe I shouldn’t care what they think. Some acquaintances also read my blog and it feels a little funny because it’s like they know me better than I know them because they read it. It just feels a little odd at times.
Amanda says
January 17, 2013 at 2:44 pmMy blog isn’t under my legal last name, but considering my entire immediate family and much of my extended family know the URL, blog titles you won’t see from me would be any and every sort of reference to a rant about my family.
And right now we’re in that season of life where, believe you me, those rants exist in abundance!
Oh well, at least all the topics of the deferred rants are alive and well and making me nuttier as we speak, so there are blessings yet π
Cindy says
January 17, 2013 at 2:48 pmI am pretty open about my blog but I do hide it from my work life. That is just asking for trouble.
I have had some issues with people confronting me thinking I was talking about them on the blog or to them specifically. That has been strange as they have always been incorrect. I do edit what I say as a result.
Pavement Runner says
January 17, 2013 at 6:20 pmI wouldnt say that it is hidden. I just don’t talk about it too much. Everyone knows that I run. Everyone knows that I run really far. Most people know it exists, but I just don’t share too much about it and generally get shy when it is brought up amongst friends. Weird. Not that I am ashamed of it, never. Just seems like it’s “my” thing that I share online.
We totally need a coffee/tea date, neighbor.
Deb says
January 17, 2013 at 6:39 pmMine’s not hidden and I use my real name on it. I don’t think my mom has ever seen it even though its in my email signature on every email I send her (I don’t think she knows what a link in an email is, TBH) but my bf’s mom reads me, as do a lot of offline friends. While it means I leave a few things out (mostly bitchy things) for the most part I say what I want to say. If I could say anything though? I hate to admit it, but there would probably be a lot of ranty whiny posts about things like my family relationships and my sex life (sometimes)… lol.
Michelle @ Running with Attitude says
January 17, 2013 at 6:40 pmVery thought provoking!
I guess my blog is still somewhat under wraps – some friends and family do read it, but I don’t really talk about it. There are topics I don’t discuss and still don’t refer to my husband and boys by name. My blog is still fairly young, as time goes on I’m sure I’ll share more.
GiGi Eats Celebrities says
January 17, 2013 at 9:58 pmOh I am not shy and I will have the weirdest blog post titles EVER – I don’t care about SEO… LOL!!!! Oh and listen to this: my family DOES NOT read my blog or watch my videos AT ALL! They hate what I do, HATE IT! Refuse to look, think I am stupid, hate my personality… LOL – All the more reason to KEEP ON TRUCKING!!! I love comedy, they hate it… I just say, they are not my target demo – and they’re NOT!!
My next blog post title will be: Charlie Sheen, Naked and Lacking – Ah ha ha ah ah aha ha!!!
sally Chippendale - only gluten free baking says
January 17, 2013 at 9:59 pmI love this post and I think being hidden is a good idea sometimes. Since I have a baking blog and people just want to see the recipes, its stops me from over sharing. When I do I often wonder whether people from my old life/school/work are reading, but then I have the attitude of who cares what they think. I do notice a few of my referees come from people searching sites and that freaks me out a bit. Have you seen those? whois.domain and things?
PlumPetals says
January 18, 2013 at 6:18 amI haven’t actively hidden my blog, but I haven’t actively promoted it either. For the longest time I didn’t post any pictures of myself. I think as I found confidence (through the blog and through my healthier lifestyle practices) I became bolder and I wanted to share my positive experience of getting healthy and attempting to lose weight.
Denise says
January 18, 2013 at 8:34 amNone of my family reads my blog. My parents don’t understand what a “blog” is. My husband – like RenMan – figures that he LIVES my life and doesn’t need to read it, too. My kids are embarrassed to think that someone as old as me would know what a blog is, much less have one. Work colleagues know I blog but don’t have the URL.
Still and all, even having blog buddies who know me offline and read my blog has made it so tough to write anything meaningful most of the time. Depression, diabetes, and an eating disordered brain just aren’t topics you necessarily want to discuss with folks you’ll actually have to face at some point.
I miss the days of total anonymity when I could talk about my crazy dating problems (pre-husband), my husband problems (post-dating), why having a 20 year daughter living with us is driving me (more) crazy, my weight loss problems, etc. If someone gave me a day of having a secret blog, that’s what I’d talk about!
Ronda says
January 18, 2013 at 11:07 amMy blog is anonymous, pretty much. You’ll never see a pic of my face or the face of anyone in my family. I don’t use my real name,etc.
However, I have told a handful of friends and family members about the blog and they do periodically check it out, but not often.
The one title you’ll never see on my blog but that I wish I could write about would be “My Crack Head Brother”, since that is what’s on my mind this week, but it’s too sensitive a subject to talk about with strangers.
roxie says
January 18, 2013 at 12:05 pmI’ve been blogging for 12 plus years, so the lines have become somewhat blurred. Several folks have moved from “internet friends” to friends IRL, but mostly, my blog is separate. And the flow is only in that direction – from blog to real life. I write under a nom de net with most details obscured.
purelytwins says
January 18, 2013 at 12:16 pmblog post title that if we saw would not read — anything with poop or stool talk — oh wait, we did do posts like that – we read them and so did others, so guess safe to say having a blog title with poop is ok π
haha
xoxo
She Rocks Fitness says
January 18, 2013 at 3:13 pmI let my readers see who I truly am, but I try not to reveal too much, because then it would veer away from the purpose of my blog. Don’t get me a wrong I could share my redunkulous dating stories with my readers, but that could possibly be a whole other blog. HA!
Elle says
January 18, 2013 at 4:01 pmThis is why I have 2 blogs… my food/recipes blog is quite UNpersonal and my family and some friends read it. The other one is more personal and no one in my family or REAL life know about it, except my husband and he doesn’t read it. I would be surprised if he even could find it! hahaa
Funny, I thought I was the only shy one!
KCLAnderson (Karen) says
January 18, 2013 at 6:20 pmMy blog is not hidden…and everyone in my family and friends circles know about it, but I have had my fair share of password-protected posts so I could process my feelings about someone who is still alive and who might not appreciate such ramblings if she were to see them.
Lia says
January 18, 2013 at 6:25 pmI think so many of us can relate to this post. I have my personal blog that is open to everyone, but I have my newer relationship blog, which I love, but don’t really advertise to many. It is just fun and I have a very different tone and it’s all about love, sex, and how to hook a guy, so I kinda keep it private. Like, my dad doesn’t know about it. Or my boyfriend. Hahahaha!
Heather @ Bake, Run, Live says
January 18, 2013 at 6:28 pmMy blog is not hidden, however, I don’t think I share a lot of information. Little bits and pieces which works just fine for me.
Tina says
January 18, 2013 at 9:20 pmHi Miz, I thought I saw you earlier this evening while walking around Lake Merritt in this gorgeous weather we’re experiencing. I totally would’ve blown your cover if it was you and I stopped to say hi, but I probably would’ve been too shy and nerdy to say anything.
I live in the area so if you have any questions or need help finding anything, feel free to email me. And welcome, by the way! Make sure to hit up the Grand Lake farmers market on Saturdays and the Jack London Square FM on Sundays.
isabel says
January 19, 2013 at 3:50 amLearning makes a good man better and ill man worse.
Heather @ For the Love of Kale says
January 19, 2013 at 8:33 amYou make me think. I love it.
Bonnie says
January 19, 2013 at 11:08 amSUPER interesting post and great discussion going on in the comments above; I really enjoyed reading people’s perspectives on the issue.
First of all, man isn’t change hard? Adjustment? New places and faces? I hope the transition goes well for you, the Tornado and Ren Man…I know there will those times of missing what you had and I hope you’re able to voice it, be real (I know you always are!) and then embrace the good stuff around you too! Sometimes it’s good to get it out there…like if I’m crying over missing family or something and my husband worries or tries to help – I just say, “hey! it’s not a bad thing! I’m just letting some tears out!” π – feel free to “let your tears out” on the blog.
Our lives are VERY open. And we’ve talked about it before. It all started w/my husband’s cancer journey – that’s how I got into blogging – to update people on his health. Then it turned into our adventures. Then I became a trainer and now it’s a health/fitness/our adventures-focused blog. My mom loves it and shares it around (so kind and supportive!), I post it on facebook, and I don’t know who reads (although I think it’s more than I might realize?). I have nothing to hide and process a lot online in hopes that it helps others as the act of posting and thinking helps me. It keeps me accountable and serves as an online journal. Not sure how much that will change when/if we have kids, but I’ve learned a lot from other bloggers w/kids. Many clients “google” me and find out a lot about me, but it seems to instantly connect us (had someone share about their cancer experience saying, they didn’t “tell their last trainer this” but after reading some of my story he wanted to share where he was coming from.
Pros and cons to sharing…and perhaps I’m not a controversial blogger to share a ton of extra info with people and then get much backlash, but I share and pray that it helps others, connects me to them, and is a fun and meaningful thing for me to do! HOLY LONG COMMENT! …Sorry, Miz! π
Deb says
January 19, 2013 at 5:23 pmBoth of my blogs were once hidden from everyone. I used childhood pictures of myself on the blogs and twitter and never linked them to my real name. Eventually I promoted my non-diet blog on FB and started linking it with the real me, but the diet blog stayed hidden until last year sometime when all of my worlds collided and a few people were able to find it if they looked hard enough.
I still don’t link to my diet blog on my FB page, though have cards printed now so do ‘own’ both blogs.
I don’t have a child or partner to worry about however!
Deb
Cynthia (It All Changes) says
January 20, 2013 at 8:29 pmMy blog was never hidden but I didn’t tell anyone about it, have a facebook page or twitter for almost a year. It was my secret place to write and see if I actually liked it.
Now my mom reads everyday and I don’t hide that I blog. But I don’t offer it up openly either. Fitbloggin’ was “vacation.”
I had to tell my boss this year though because I had approved vacation and they wanted to send me to a mandatory training. I needed to explain why this wasn’t just vacation. Such an awkward experience. But I’m awkward.
Samantha says
January 21, 2013 at 9:32 pmMy blog isn’t hidden, some know about it, some don’t. I finally did a linkedin because I am looking for work, but no facebook.
If I was entirely hidden, I would be more open about my fears, my failures and my shaky future. Knowing my mom especially will read some of my stuff makes me rein it in. And to be honest, maybe no one needs to read that stuff about me. π