(our fancy ONLY for use while G.G. viewing cups.)
Once upon a time, 15 years ago (!), a little show named Gilmore Girls was launched.
Flash forward fourteen long years and I’d changed.
Gone were the dreadlocks and thoughts only of myself & growing my training business:
(who knew *those* were the easy days?!)
And in their place thoughts of moving, creating routine and maintaining lines of mama/child communication:
(yep. I now knew it would only get more complicated.)
I began to search.
I wasn’t even sure what I was looking for– I just recalled a conversation I had once with a personal training client.
“I have 2 degrees,” she said. “Both are from Ivy League schools. I never thought Id be a RAW fanatic, but if that’s what it takes to create a shared interest with my son—I’ll do it.”
I remember thinking:
RAW? Wow, that’s love. I hate wrestling. Is that what moms do?!
This same longing for a shared interest and connection was exactly what I was feeling a few months ago.
Something which might provide a thread of continuity in what I knew would be a bumpy transition time.
Thanks to a conversation with a friend (in passing. serendipity.) I discovered precisely what I’d been searching for.
A trashy piece of TV-fluff on the surface which has provided me opportunity to reinforce my mothering-approach with her without saying a word.
6 ways Gilmore Girls reinforced my mothering
- Change comes and goes. We’re *still* fine. Having not seen even a preview of G.G. before I’d not realized this was an overarching message and it was a timely reinforcement for us. For a child NOT in a military family my girl moves way too frequently. G.G. has reminded her it is all just fine as long as we’re together.
(child note circa 2012)
- Being a misfit is OK. From the oft repeated those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind to the messages I send about just be yourself it was a happy accident Girlmore Girls backed all this up. Rory is quirky, nerdy, and doesn’t quite fit in at Chilton. She simply chooses to surround herself with others who are the same and is happily OK with it all.
(tater tots + apple sauce + skull plate = our MisFit-Hanukkah)
- It’s important to allow the CHILD an opportunity to play expert. We need to empower children. It’s important to give them wings and not just create roots. We need to show them the wisdom they already possess. It’s important to let them lead sometimes. “Mama see? Lorelai is like you. She comes to Rory’s bed and asks her advice.” ‘Nuff said.
(photo credit & instructor credit: the 8 year old.)
- Money and material things do not make us happy. Two words: Paris Geller. (More words? Hard work creates a better life. There’s no need for reliance on anyone but yourself and your tenacity.)
(the best things in life *really* are free)
- Traditions are important even if they aren’t the traditions others embrace! From being Jewish to being adopted to being unapologetically ourselves
to our addiction to G.G.chances are our traditions differ from other families. That’s not just OK–it’s cause for celebration. Now we *both* do the traditional cowgurl dance to Gilmore Girls’ closing tune:
- wallow feel embrace the sad mourn (BREAKUP) as only then can you move through
- Embrace the sad. Feel all the feelings. Then you can move on. Ahh Rory. Your break up could not have come at a better time….for us.** Your heartbreak reinforced how it’s important to grieve (change. boyfriends. lost friendships. everything.) as only then can you you push through to the *new* which awaits.
(sometimes tattoo-tears precede real tears.)
- Have you joined us in our Gilmore Girls viewing? What life lessons has it reinforced for you?
**please do NOT share in the comments if this Rory/Dean break up is one of many to come. We like to be surprised. We still on second season.