6 ways Gilmore Girls reinforced my parenting.

by

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(our fancy ONLY for G.G. viewing cups.)

The below is in celebration of the fact Gilmore Girls is returning for four NEW 90 minute episodes.

The Child and I have already begun our preparations.

Once upon a time, 15 years ago, a little show named Gilmore Girls was launched.

I was a happy newlywed living in Chapel Hill, North Carolina and cared NOT AT ALL about the WB channel or its offerings.

Flash forward fourteen long years and I’d changed.

Gone were the dreadlocks and thoughts only of myself & growing my training business:

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(who knew *those* were the easy days?!)

And in their place thoughts creating routine and maintaining lines of mama/child communication:

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(yep. I now knew it would only get more complicated.)

I began to search.

I wasn’t sure what I was looking for– I just recalled a conversation I once had with a personal training client.

“I have 2 degrees,” she said. “Both are from Ivy League schools. I never thought Id be a RAW fanatic, but if that’s what it takes to create a shared interest with my son—I’ll do it.”

I remember thinking:

RAW? Wow, that’s love. I hate wrestling. Is that what moms do?!

This same longing for a shared interest was exactly what I felt last year.

I wanted something my daughter and I could launch in Oakland and maintain in Austin after we moved.

Something which might provide a thread of continuity in what I knew would be a bumpy transition time.

Thanks to a conversation with a friend (in passing. serendipity.) I found precisely what I’d been searching for.

A to her eyes fun piece of TV-fluff which has provided me opportunity to reinforce my mothering-approach and yet never have to say a word.

6 ways Gilmore Girls reinforced my mothering

  • Change comes and goes. We’re *still* fine. Having never seen G.G. before I’d not realized this was an overarching message and it was a timely reinforcement for us. For a child NOT in a military family my girl moves way too frequently. G.G. has reminded her it is all just fine as long as we’re together.

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(child note circa 2012)

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(tater tots + apple sauce + skull plate = our MisFit-Hanukkah)

  • It’s important to allow the CHILD an opportunity to play expert. We need to empower children. It’s important to give them wings and not just anchor them with roots. We need to show them the wisdom they already possess. It’s important to let them lead sometimes. “Mama see? Lorelai is like you. She comes to Rory’s bed and asks her advice.” ‘Nuff said.

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(photo credit & instructor credit: the 9 year old.)

  • Money and material things do not make us happy. Two words: Paris Geller. (More words? Hard work creates a better life. There’s no need for reliance on anyone but yourself and your tenacity.)

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(the best things in life *really* are free)

  • Traditions are important even if they aren’t traditions others have! From being Jewish to being adopted to being unapologetically ourselves chances are our traditions differ from other families. That’s not just OK–it’s cause for celebration. Now we *both* do the traditional cowgurl dance to Gilmore Girls’ closing tune:

  • Embrace the sad. Feel all the feelings. Only then can you move on. Ahh Rory. Your break up (deliberately vague here for new watchers) could not have come at a better time for our duo. Your heartbreak reinforced how it’s important to grieve (change. boyfriends. lost friendships. everything.) as only then can you you push through to the *new* which awaits.

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(sometimes tattoo-tears precede real tears.)

And you?

  • Is Gilmore Girls one of your favorites? What life lessons has it reinforced for you?

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Comments

  1. YOU were the first person I thought of when I heard they were returning.
    I’d never watched the show until you and your daughter said you did!

  2. Would it be weird to watch GG and Walking Dead at the same time? You post about GG so much that now I really want to watch but I’m totally obsessed with Walking Dead right now and that just seems like to weird a combo 🙂

  3. The only reason I was disappointed my baby wasn’t a girl was because I’d miss being able to have the Loreli/Rory dynamic.

  4. I do think I am finally ready for kids. I hope I have a Rory to guide me through this parenting process 🙂

  7. You know, I’ve still never seen this show but I’ve seen the headlines about it coming back on Netflix or something. I seriously need to check it out!

  8. I loved the series and don’t know if I can watch any updates.
    Even though the ending wasn’t what I wanted I think it is ended for me.

  9. Don’t judge me. I’ve never watched Gilmore Girls! With all the renewed interest in it I now have to take a look, and learn all of the lessons you learned from it. Wow.

  10. I’ve never watched the Gilmour Girls, but I know plenty of “girls” who love it and are excited about the new episodes that are coming. I think it’s great to have something so nice to share with your daughter (and I love her cowgirl dance!)

  11. What I learned from Gilmore Girls was that mothers and daughters can have this amazing close friendship as well as being mother and daughter. I never had that with my mom but I’ve sure got it with mine. The connection between Lorelai and Rory is something special.

  13. What a fun post to read! So upbeat and funny.. love your style and your cute pictures! I never watched GG’s before….but with all the recent coverage….I’m in for this go around! Thanks for this…..can’t wait to enjoy!

  14. I love GG. I just watched all 7? seasons last year after only having watched sporadic episodes here and there growing up. I’m super excited that they’re coming back! I don’t have any girls, but do have sister in laws who are huge fans!

  16. Gilmore Girls is on Netflix, yes? I have NEVER watched it before but I have a feeling… I would like it NOW – because I tend to like shows that I have been off the air for awhile…… And I like to binge watch them! 😉

  17. I started watching GG nine years ago when I was on maternity leave with my daughter. I never even considered watching the show WITH her until now. Hmm, maybe time for some mother-daughter bonding on Netflix!!!

  18. My daughters are 27 and 21, so we’ve logged plenty of GG time. I would add, sometimes a night in pajamas, watching tv and eating junk food is the perfect solution for anything.

  19. Hi Carla! Okay I don’t have any daughters but I must confess that I’ve watched LOTS of GG. I’m rather amazed at all the other commenters who said they have never seen it. It is a bit mushy and dramatic but I LOVE how you’ve taken many of the jewels from the show and reminded me of them. My favorite is: “Change comes and goes and we’re still fine!” So VERY true. ~Kathy

  23. Loved Gilmore Girls! And so excited for new episodes 🙂

    I found GG very progressive in some ways (the breakup you referred to, for example – and the concept that a woman doesn’t*need* to be in a romantic relationship which is somehow so foreign in Hollywood).

    In other ways, I found it problematic and a little backwards (such as the lack of choice and the assumption that the accidental pregnancies mean that these people will just automatically have and keep the child – without anyone even bringing up the idea of other options, such as abortion or adoption, if having children isn’t right for those women at that point in time).

    Overall, however, there are so many applicable life lessons from that show. It makes my heart happy 🙂

  24. My son and his family are GG fanatics. He has two boys and a girl. Today, I heard on NPR that it’s one of the all time best tv shows. I must begin at once.

    (BTW, NPR interviewee also said it cemented the CWs focus on life through a young female’s perspective.)

  28. I have been a GG fan since the very beginning. And I agree there are so many great lessons through the show. Did you hear – they are going to bring GG back for a reunion!!!

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