Bashert is a Yiddish word that means destiny.
Growing up I heard it used to mean ‘predestined’ spouse or soulmate, but it can also be used to capture the seeming destiny of an incident or friendship.
At its essence bashert is defined as “meant to be.” For me, however, the 3 words don’t convey the full power behind the Yiddish word.
A few days ago I closed on/received the keys to my new condo.
I don’t know I’m excited.
I’m quite certain I’m transition-terrified.
I completely believe it’s bashert.
Allow me to back up a bit.
A little over a year ago I made my neighbor become my friend.
We’d been back from Oakland for a few months and I desperately missed having good friends a short walk away.
I had plenty of friends I could drive to, but there’s simply something about having PeopleOnYourStreet which makes the challenges of daily living a lot more bearable.
Enter my neighbor (into my life that is. she’d lived here all along).
Enter Assertive Carla (with Doodle in tow. he excels at friend-making).
Enter a friendship whose complexity and depth I never could have predicted.
Unlike many friendships born of proximity ours quickly blossomed (cue movie montage of friendlove)
and seemed bashert.
We’ll come back to her. She’s important later. But first onward to condo-shopping.
Once upon a 4+ months or so the Husband and I decided to separate.
After 20+ years together we’d grown and changed in ways we individually liked, but together we no longer seemed to fit (and that’s all I’ll ever say about that).
Enter Carla Condo shopper (alone. not yet ready to throw realtor in mix).
Enter expensive Austin housing market (not California. still overwhelming).
Enter bashert again in a way I never could have seen coming.
I found a fixer-upper condo. A price I could swing. A few major renovation projects I’d need to complete before moving in.
I hate renovation stuff and basically anything to do with interior decorating. This condo, however, was what I could afford.
I caved, called my realtor and decided to look more seriously (*and* dragged along friends. I need a Lady Posse like that.).
What we saw together was what I’d seen solo. Not much. Nothing great. All requiring work.
Enter bashert in the form of serendipitously stumbled upon 2 bedroom condo.
A place I’d not known was on the market. Swarming with interested buyers. The moment I walked the red brick path to its door I knew I was home.
“It comes as-is,” I overheard the realtor say. “All furniture conveys.”
The Lady Posse and I walked inside and my initial reaction was confirmed: This was home.
The light, the energy, the new-with-tags couch & chair: It was an about-to-be-separated-woman-and-her –striving to be resilient-child’s dream condo.
It was bashert.
And, while there have been bumps in the road to ownership, bashert has only continued and grown.
We are soon moving into a condo filled with beds, couches, dressers, dining room table and chairs.
When I joked to my realtor how I’d love the current owner’s dishes (she left the country the day we closed) the next time I saw the seller she informed me she was leaving me those as well.
(You leave husband and come here with only toothbrush! were her exact words.)
Fantastic light/energy, furniture, dishes, still in our current neighborhood–I couldn’t conceive of an easier transition for the Child or for me.
Which circles me back to the neighborfriend at the start of my story.
A woman whom I spied a few times, concluded we must be friends, and have woven entirely into the fabric of my life.
A woman whom the Child admires and adores.
Enter bashert in the form of her spontaneously deciding to sell her home and buy a condo.
Her absolute dream domicile located we-share-a-wall-right-next-door-to-mine.
I’ve remarked to people this life-shift has felt guided by a force far larger than myself.
Its been one ‘sign’ after another this is the path I’m intended to take no matter how seemingly scary it feels.
It’s time. It’s happening.
Jennifer saysOctober 16, 2017 at 5:42 am
Wow! The word bashert is new to me and after reading your story, I totally believe in it!
Coco saysOctober 16, 2017 at 5:55 am
So many amazing blessings in this transition. I love your seller’s advice. And your friend moving next store? I thought that only happened in tv shows!
<3 <3 <3
messymimi saysOctober 16, 2017 at 7:17 am
May you and your whole family be blessed by this in ways you’ve never imagined.
Michele saysOctober 16, 2017 at 8:37 am
WOW….. wishing you all the success and happiness in the world on your new adventure. Although it sounds like you have some help working the details!
Susan saysOctober 16, 2017 at 9:21 am
I’m proud of you+++ and know there will be such great stories of you and your new life.
Allie saysOctober 16, 2017 at 9:54 am
Wow. Just wow. Indeed it is bashert. Go YOU!
Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Parenting saysOctober 16, 2017 at 11:21 am
Yes, my path has felt the same, too. Destiny, fate, bashert – yes! ??
Ellen Dolgen saysOctober 16, 2017 at 11:23 am
This is fantastic! Love that word……..bashert.
Shauna saysOctober 16, 2017 at 11:36 am
Love love love this and YOU.
Wendy@Taking the Long Way Home saysOctober 16, 2017 at 7:27 pm
Meant to be. I hope your new home is all that you deserve! <3
Leanne | crestingthehill saysOctober 16, 2017 at 9:57 pm
Carla what an AMAZING story – I’m so happy for you that this transition is going more smoothly than even you could have expected! I hope the relational side of things works out well too and that your future is as bright and perfect as your new condo xx
MCM Mama saysOctober 17, 2017 at 7:09 am
Love this. Love the concept of bashert. I’m so happy that things are falling into place for you.
Sharon greenthal saysOctober 17, 2017 at 9:23 am
I love bashert moments and experiences like yours. It’s as if the universe is focusing directly on me when it happens. Mazel Tov on your new home!
Anita Irlen saysOctober 17, 2017 at 10:44 am
Ha, my mother in law uses that saying! Now, I think I understand it better. You astound me, I would rather die (spit three times) than have a close friend live next door. Friends, with a neighbor? No! Ah, big city life… Glad you are happy and home.
Jody saysOctober 17, 2017 at 2:42 pm
Haralee saysOctober 17, 2017 at 3:44 pm
Wow is it ever bashert! Congratulations.